better than the best
by zlash08
Summary: "He is my self-inflicted pain..my preposterous diversion..my momentary bliss..my blameworthy experience..my poisonous religion..he is my annoyance and yet..he remains to be...my only happiness"   "forehead did you forget your meds again!" AU sasusaku
1. sleepless

Here it is! My first fic! It's a bit rushed so I'm not sure if I have mistakes here and there. I hope you like it though! Enjoy!

chapter 1 **SLEEPLESS**

TICK TOCK TICK TOCKTICK TOCK…

"AAARRGGHHH! I hate that friggin' clock!" , pillow placed on both ears.

TICK TOCK TICK TOCK TICK TOCK…

SIGH.. Turning sideways, I poked the slumbering girl beside me.

"Ino"…*poke poke* "Ino…"*poke poke*…Still no answer.

"INO!" I accompanied it with a strong shove this time.

"WHA?" startled, my best friend shot up. I gave her the most innocent look I could muster. She gave me a blank stare before she glanced at her alarm clock propped at her bedside table. The clock read 2:30 AM. That's when she exploded.

"WHAT THE HELL YOU PIXIE SIZED BITCH! IT'S 2 FREAKIN' 30 AM!" she hollered.

I should probably describe her first. She has this long blonde hair worthy of a shampoo commercial, beautiful, scar less skin, a body I'd die for and expressive baby blue eyes-eyes which are currently trying to kill me with their glare.

I adopted my kicked puppy look and directed it at her. It didn't work of course.

"Don't you use that on me you puny little scumbag! I could kick you in the face right now and never feel guilty!" she stretched her endless left leg and fake-kicked me.

I inched away from her lower limbs and in the process I almost fell from her single-sized bed. Her bed is so small we usually end up sleeping beside each others' legs, my face beside her feet and my feet beside her—shoulder. She's so much taller than me and I hate it!

I sighed and looked up the ceiling; trying to count the number of specs I can see despite the dim light my ever dependable nightlight emits. She herself sighed and placed her hand on my shoulder. A sign for me to start talking. Her "pissed off state" replaced by her "understanding mode".

"I can't sleep. The stupid clock keeps on ticking."

She snorted and gave me a look of pure astonishment.

"I can't believe it! You're our top student and everything, yet you don't know that that's what clocks do!They tick!" she exclaimed while waving her hands in the air.

I sighed again and tried to swallow the lump in my throat.

"I know… I just wish it would shut up and stop ticking."

She gave me a sidewards glance.

"What do you want me to do, find a clock that sings?" I couldn't help but roll my eyes at her response.

I went back to my favorite hobby for the moment, specs-on-ceiling-counting. I could see her in the corner of me eye. She was trying hard not to pull her hair in annoyance.

"Look we've been through this a billion times already! Gods I could kill that son of a toooot!" I smiled at her inability to call _his_ mom the "B" word. She's such a nice mom that we can't stomach the thought of calling her such even though her son is quite the bastard that he is.

"It's not his fault Ino," I smiled weakly at her. "I've always been disturbed with the clock thing."

"Wanna bet?" she placed both her hands at her hips and raised one of her eyebrows, reminding me of my favorite WWE superstar, The Rock. "When did the-stupid-fear-of-the-clock start? The stupid-drive-in-the-rain-in-your-bike start? The stupid keep-quiet-when-you-think-no one-notices, which I notice by the way, start? The stupid blank-stare-at-the-door-start? The stupid jog-til-you-drop start? The stupid lying-on-the-soccer-field-even though-its-filled-with-disease-carrying-mosquitoes-at-night-time-to-catch-a-glimpse-of-falling-stars start? The "

"Okay okay fine!" Better stop her before she wakes the entire apartment up. "Quit it with the stupid things I do crap! Sheeeesshh!" She rolled her eyes at me. "I'm the one hurting here! Why is everyone out to get me these days? Even my own bestfriend seems to find the "dark side" entertaining!" I crossed my arms and glared at her.

"Why don't you just call him?" she asked. She started twirling her hair in her fingers, a sure sign that she was beyond bored.

"It's 2:30AM! What do you want me to say to him -Hey Sasucakes, I saw you with a really hot chick this afternoon. I would've been proud of you for nabbing that gorgeous girl but I thought you were supposed to be with that smokin' redhead? The one with you was definitely a brunette! Not that I care or anything but you promised me, promised me three effin' times, that you'll try to be good now. Having two girls in 1 day is considered good now?" I was left breathless after my rant. I didn't notice that my hands went to my hair and started to pull. "OUCH!" I let go of my hair and sighed again.

My phone vibrated on the bedside table. My mouth went slack when my ever loyal bestfriend got my phone and read the text.

"No comment," she said with her perfectly-plucked left eyebrow raised.

"What?" she's gone crazy again. Why do I always get myself stuck with crazy people?

"It's a blank screen so it means no comment," she bit back tilting her head. I tried to grab my phone but she raised her arm. Naturally I couldn't reach it. I huffed and pouted.

"How can you possibly be sure that it's what the blank text means? It could mean "Hey I'm dying so I can't type so I'll send you a blank text" for all you know?"

She sent me a devious glance and said "It's from your imaginary boyfriend." At that I jumped and got a second attempt at grabbing my phone, which was not successful for she stood and raised her arm higher.

"I hate you, you bitch! I'm telling Shika that you agreed to go out with Kanky!" I all but shouted at her.

She grinned and stuck her tongue out at me. "It's okay. He's too lazy to get mad anyway and it's not a date. And besides, I'm not going to that alone you know. You're supposed to be there with me and Gaara is supposed to be with Kankuro," she had the audacity to wiggle her eyebrows at me. Gods I hate her so much!

"Fine! Just give me my phone back!"

This time she smiled and gave it to me.

"Know what? If I had known that getting you to agree to go out and have fun would be this easy I would have done this sooner," she sat down the bed and tried to get comfortable again.

"What did he say?" I asked to no one in particular. Then I felt pain on my head. I realized only too late that she had bonked me on the head.

"It's a blank text! I thought you were supposed to be smart!"


	2. only his friend

Before I start I'd like to give a very warm thank you to those who took time to review.

EndlessFlame911: I'm very happy that you see potential in this story. It's my very first fic so it really means a lot to me (^_^)

Illneverknow: Sorry if I got you confused. But hopefully as the story progresses you'd be enlightened. (^_^)

Oh I forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.

Naruto isn't mine, although I really wish it was.

**Chapter 2: Only his friend**

"_What did he say?" I asked to no one in particular. Then I felt pain on my head. I realized only too late that she had bonked me on the head._

"_It's a blank text! I thought you were supposed to be smart!"_

I rolled my eyes at her and started typing while grumbling about sadistic bitches and inconsiderate bestfriends.

_ME: what's wrong? Are you okay?_

I wait for a few seconds before my phone vibrated. My body then reacted accordingly upon seeing that it's from _him_. And by accordingly, I mean increase in heart rate, sudden intake of breath and apparent decrease of temperature in my fingers and toes. My friends dub my reaction as my "pathetic rag doll" mode. Whatever biatches, I know you love me anyway!

_IMAGINARY BOYFRIEND: stupid insomnia._

It figures. He's lucky I'm still awake. Who am I kidding? If I'm asleep, I know I'd wake up once I see that he's the one texting me. I'm so pathetic. I hate myself sometimes.

_ME: Have you tried counting sheep?_

It doesn't work for me but others tell me it does. Not all of them count sheep though. Naru likes to count ninjas, Shika likes counting clouds, Ino likes counting flowers in the field and I heard from Tennie that Neji likes counting his hair, weird right? I doubt she was telling the truth though. She was pissed at Nej when she told me that. I'm rambling to myself again. I think Ino and Naru's craziness is rubbing off on me.

_IMAGINARY BOYFRIEND: 6 billion and counting_

_ME: What is it?_

_IMAGINARY BOYFRIEND: hn_

_ME: The brunette or the redhead?_

Here I go again. Self-inflicted pain, how are you? It's nice to see you again. You seem to be present in all my days lately.

_IMAGINARY BOYFRIEND: ?_

Quit it with the innocent play Sasucakes! Aarggh!

_ME: Quit denying cassanova, I saw you this afternoon._

_IMAGINARY BOYFRIEND: the redhead. Brunette's outside on the couch._

I comfort myself in thinking that at least he can't bring himself to lie to me. And in case he does I'd know he's lying anyway. Many years of friendship do that to people. I'm his friend. SIGH. I'm _only_ his friend.

_ME: bitch fight? Really Sasucakes, you shouldn't cause too much of those. It's unhealthy for the "girl world"._

Why am I still talking to this guy? I should kick his balls for doing every crime a boy could do to a girl!

_IMAGINARY BOYFRIEND: They didn't fight. But they got me real tired after._

I started to take deep breaths through my mouth trying to calm myself. It wouldn't do well if I start hyperventilating. My throat started to hurt and my tear ducts are preparing themselves to do their work. I looked up the ceiling to prevent tiny droplets from falling. I smiled despite myself. How many times must he hurt me before I get numb? I hate him so much! I shook my head and sighed. It's not his fault. He doesn't know he's hurting me so it's my fault, my fault for _allowing_ him to hurt me.

_ME: How many times do I have to tell you not to mention your sexcapades with me Sasucakes! I hate it when you do that! It's gross!_

I felt Ino sit up and peek at my phone. She then looked at me. Upon seeing the hurt look in my face, she took my phone and started to read my inbox and sent items.

"You're acting like a rag doll again forehead. Are you a masochist or something?" she raised both her hands in front of my face when I tried to answer her. "Don't answer that! I really admire you, you know? How the hell do you understand his itsy bitsy sentences?"

I wanted to answer her but my phone started buzzing. I took it from her and looked at the screen. She positioned herself beside me and craned her neck so she could also read what's on my phone.

_Message from SASUCAKES. Read?_

Of course I'm going to read it, DUH!

_You only say it's gross because you don't have the guts to do it yourself._

I could practically feel him smirking from the other end of the phone. He didn't deny it! He had sex with two girls and told me! He had a threesome and told me! That prick! I told him not to tell me stuff like that! And what's wrong with waiting for my husband to do that stuff with me, a husband that would preferably be him? I HATE HIM!

"INOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I hugged her and started to sob. Why does it have to be me? Why can't he just share his stupid after sex info with his stupid friends? I can't take this anymore! Come morning and I'll give him a piece of my mind! Ino made a "tsk" sound and told me to go to sleep.

"Quit crying forehead, or you'll look like a zombie in the morning," she added.

_ME: Whatever Sasucakes. I'm sleeping. And I don't care if you can't sleep. Go disturb Naru or something._

_HIM: Okay. I'll introduce them to you in the morning. I'm not sure which one I should keep for the week. You choose for me. And I can't disturb the Dobe, I'm in my pad not in my dorm room._

Of course he's in his pad! I don't think he'd like what happened last time when Gai-sensei caught him in a heap of blankets with a naked girl in his dormroom. Gai-sensei's speech about the youthfulness of birds and the bees could be heard all over the the school! It didn't help that Naru had taken pictures of his "supposed hairy ass" and put it in their locker room. It was safe to say that Naru went to practice with a sheepish smile and a nasty black eye while shouting at the top of his lungs.

_"It was worth it you guys! The look on Teme's face was priceless!"_

* * *

Ino's evil alarm clock sounded 15 minutes before 7AM. I sat up and turned it off. I have Biology 101 at 7:30 and I don't want to be late in Anko sensei's class. She's cool and she rocks! And she'll have my head if I come in late.

Standing up I noticed that Ino wasn't on her side of the bed. There was a note on the wall beside her pillow saying "_Forehead, I had to go to school early. The soccer team starts their training for the season finals today and Gai-sensei says it wouldn't be 'youthful' for the cheerleaders to be absent during their 'journey to greatness!' as he put it, which means we have to cheer for them during their games AND during practice. P.S. please have pity on your eyes and do ice compress? Your eye bags look hideous. See yah later biatch! -INO"_

Oh so I'll be going to school alone today. Its okay, I need the silence anyway. I started getting my stuff and placing it in my overnight bag. Then I fixed the bed and got my bathroom essentials beside Ino's and went down to the showers. Before I got in a girl with eyeglasses and fiery red hair stopped me-Karin-Sasucakes' on and off girlfriend, and one of my closest friends. Great! Just great!

"What the hell happened? Did you convince Ino to watch A Walk to Remember again? I told you it's not healthy to cry over that! You've seen it gazillion times!" she said, gesturing to my tired eyes. I huffed and pouted.

"No I didn't watch A Walk to Remember, I just had a hard time sleeping last night," I tried to get past her but she held my shoulders and looked at me pointedly.

"Is this about your ex? Sakura, it's been over a year! Quit crying for him already!"

"No Karin, it's not about my ex," I crinkled my nose and sighed. It's more like _your _ex- I wanted to add. But I decided not to. I don't want her to feel bad for me. Karin and I have been friends since we were 7. I met her a year before I met Ino. I got more attached to Ino because Karin has her way of making me feel inferior without even trying and Ino is the one making me feel like I'm special. Aside from _him _of course.

Her eyes softened. "What is it then? You know you can tell me right? But if it's about this guy you've been pinning over since times immemorial then I don't want to hear it," I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. She raised one of her eyebrows at my expression. I'm so tired of this.

"Karin, if I don't get in the shower in 5 minutes I'll be late. Then Anko-sensei will kill me and she'll fail me and I could kiss my scholarship goodbye and I'll just work in a bar and be a stripper! I know this is your apartment complex and you own the land I'm standing on right now but if you won't let me pass I'll gut you and kick you in your girl-balls!" She smiled and backed up raising her hands.

"Fine, you don't have to be violent," she laughed a little and turned away. "I just wish you'd tell me who the guy is. I could help you get together with him you know?" she got out of the building with a wave of her hand.

"Yeah right, you'll just laugh at me and call me stupid for falling in love with the person you've repeatedly played with," I whispered to myself.

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-Thanks for reading!


	3. stupid things i do take 1

Hi guys!

Here I am with chapter 3! In this chapter I'll introduce more characters. I think you've noticed that in each chapter I try to add a character and explain a thing or two about them. Here, I'm going to introduce Sasuke's teammates and a little bit info on Sakura's brothers. I also have here the explanation of some of Sakura's stupid-things-I-do-crap. The story is going a little slow because I don't want you guys to go "Hey when the hell did that happen? And why is so and so acting like that?"

Oh and big thank you to those who reviewed!

illneverknow: I'm glad you got that and I'm even happier that you liked it! Thank you so much for finding time to review. It means a lot to a beginner like me.

woodbyne: you will never know how happy I was when I read your review! It got me inspired to write this next chapter. I wasn't really planning on updating yet because of a lot of things-family, annoying problem-filled friends, stress at work and other dramas in life. But after reading your review, I smiled and started typing. Thank you so much! (^_^)

_italics- flashback_

normal-present

naruto isn't mine.

* * *

**chapter 3- Stupid Things I Do take 1**

The journey to school was uneventful. I walked as fast as I could, which was pretty fast considering the amount of things I was carrying. On my left hand I carried my overnight bag. I can't risk leaving it at Ino's room. On my right shoulder I have my school bag, a very big red bag with shiny little trinkets. Naru calls it the "mob bag", Karin calls it a monstrosity and I call it Cherry. Aside from my school essentials, it has everything I need inside-toothbrush, toothpaste, tampons, tissue, medicine for emergencies, spare clothes, my family picture, my Zen Stone plus and my amazing night light. People who tried carrying it for me (Kiba, Naru, Shino and Neji) complained that it could cause an arm to fall off. I can't help but smile remembering what happened the day before.

"_I don't find it heavy at all you guys!" I explained while trying to sooth Kiba's sprained arm. He got it when a kid ran past him while he was carrying Cherry, the little boy's shoulder bumped my bag and the momentum caused the weight of the bag to bring Kiba down._

"_Hn. You shouldn't bring your whole house everywhere you go Sakz. It could cause us the championship. Who the hell is going to play goalie now that Kiba's injured?" the ever amazing assistant team captain and team manager of the Leaf Shinobis, Uchiha Sasuke, looked at me questioningly. "If only you took my advice and left it in my dorm room this would not have happened."_

_I puffed my cheeks and refrained from answering. I can't just tell him that I've become wary upon entering their dorm. His dorm mates would tease me endlessly saying stuff like "Hey, Uchiha's girl is here! Clear the way or you'll get your ass kicked," my screaming match from long, long time ago (well, I was screaming and stupid Sasucakes was smirking) with their resident playboy got them the idea that we were in a relationship. A relationship wherein I was the boss and Sasucakes was more than whipped to deny me of everything I want. Him obeying me and giving me everything I want? Sheesh! I wish! He wouldn't even give me the time of the day when he's with his flavor of the week. He just remembers me when he needs something. _

I stopped my recollection upon entering a small gate. I arrived at my destination with still 30 minutes to spare. My happy place-a bench under a cherry blossom tree near the cafeteria but not quite-was unoccupied. Not surprising though, I'm the only one who goes there. It's in a small park inside the school. There you could see exotic plants and lots of butterflies flying about. I go there at times wherein I need to think, away from the noise my close peers make when we're together. Not that I don't make noise with them since I'm usually the noisiest, together with Ino and Naru. But sometimes I just like to keep quiet and allow myself to feel without their scrutiny. They usually freak out once I stop talking.

"_Sakura-chan? Are you okay? Did Teme do something nasty to you again? I'm gonna kick his ass!" _

"_No Naru, he didn't do anything. I'm fine." _

"_But you're quiet! You're never quiet! You only go mute when he talks to you or something! It's like he has the remote control and used it on you! Your mood changes when he's around and your volume changes too! And your eyes are a bit puffy! I'm gonna find that bastard and make him pay for what he did to you!" he insisted and started walking away._

"_But Naru!" I tried to stop him. It's not Sasuke's fault. He didn't know that bringing me to his date with Karin would make me feel this way. He needed someone to arrange the venue for their 1__st__ month celebration as a couple and it so happened that the owner of the restaurant he was planning on renting was a friend of my mom. So naturally he asked me to be there in the sidelines to supervise his surprise for his beloved redhead. He was supposed to take me home after their date but he forgot. Guess he got a little excited since Karin liked the surprise, probably did another celebration in each others arms after that. It was raining and I had to walk 20 blocks to get to the bus stop. My mind was screaming with the injustice the world was giving me. My throat felt like it was roasting inside the oven and my eyes were starting to get red because of my constant rubbing. No matter what i do, tears still keep falling. Its okay, if I let it all out my throat would stop hurting. My heart would be the only part of me left with pain. I love the rain. It hides my tears. I swear I heard that line from somewhere. _

_When I got home that night my big brothers were all there, Nagato, Sasori and Pein. We seldom get together because they live in a different village, Ame, where their work is situated. They all went to big bro mode when they saw me drenched from the rain._

"_Weren't you supposed to be with Itachi's little brother?" our eldest, Pein-nii, asked while wrapping me in my pink fluffy towel. My brothers and Itachi, Sasuke's older brother, go way back. They were teammates since grade school. "I think I have to make a call to the Uchiha's and tell him that his foolish little brother got you soaked from the rain." _

"_Ahmm… Yeah but I had to buy something so I told him to go ahead. It's not his fault," I answered while looking at my feet. I really don't feel comfortable lying to my brother's. It's like they know that I'm lying, especially Sasori-nii._

"_What did you buy then?" See? He knows I'm lying already!_

"_Oh that's why I went home! I have to get my bike to go buy that stuff I'm supposed to buy!" I rushed to the backyard and got my bike. When I was about to go out Nagato-nii blocked my path._

"_Princess, it's pouring outside. Mother and Father will likely have our heads if you get sick," I shot him a stubborn look. Our parents left my brothers in charge since they had to go to our aunt's house to help her with her new baby. He sighed and handed me his jacket, it was from his team from school, the Akatsuki, and it was waterproof. I smiled and kissed him on the cheek. They could never deny me anything._

"_Thanks Aniki!" I then proceeded to bike my way to oblivion. Sometimes shouting to my heart's content when it thunders, synchronizing it with the sound so no one would think i was going crazy. Who in their right mind would bike around in the rain and scream their guts out? No one, no one but me, I'm so pathetic. Now, when my brothers are home and I feel the need to cry, I just go out and bike around the neighborhood. I don't want them to see me cry. It's more effective under the rain too! Tears and raindrops go so well together. _

Sighing, I dropped my overnight bag beside the bench I sat on. Great, I hate remembering the stupid things I do because of stupid Sasucakes. He is so stupid! Arghh! But I'm even more stupid because I get myself stupid for him! I sighed and hugged Cherry and got my notebook for Biology. I need to study for our quiz for the day. Anko-sensei doesn't announce quizzes but knowing her, we'd have one today. It's a Monday after all and she always feels extra sadistic on the first day of the school week, probably to make up for the two days of rest in terrorizing her students. I then heard shouts from my left. I smiled to myself. The Shinobis are done with their morning bout of "youthfulness". I wonder why they're here. Did Gai-sensei make them take the longer route to their dorm or something?

"Why do we have to pass this way Teme? It's a gazillion miles away from our dorm! And the pool is that way! I want to see them ladies in their itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini!" that should be Naru.

"Shut up Dobe. I didn't ask you to follow me," and his highness, the playboy of all playboys. I kept my eyes on my notebook and tried hard to stop myself from looking their way. If I catch Sasucakes' eyes I might go overdrive and go in pathetic rag doll mode again. That or I'll kick him senseless for sharing his after sex info with me.

"Maybe Sasuke-san thinks that an extra mile would help us in our training! And then develop our stamina for the upcoming championship! Yosh! I salute you vice-captain! I will pass this way each time we finish our morning training!" and that should be Lee-san. I hope he doesn't notice me. I lowered my head and tried to hide behind Cherry. I'm a bit relieved to see that one of the bushes was hiding me from his view. Not that I don't like Lee-san, it's just that it's too early to deal with all his "youthful" crap. I don't know why he's so determined to make me his "princess" and confess his love "with a thousand burning suns" each day. I mean what's there to like about me? I look really weird; I have pink hair for crying out loud! I'm a nerd, "_a cute nerd!", _a voice sounding like Naru supplies my musings. I'm not really into parties and stuff. I think I'm pretty boring to talk to. I'm really short and I obsess about silly things like saving candy wrappers. The candies were of course given to me by _him. _I'm such a dork! I even saved the straw I used when _he_ bought me that coke once! Ino's probably right, I'm going crazy and time will come that I couldn't hold it any longer and just end up kidnapping _him_ and locking _him_ up so no one else could have him. Then I'd laugh that evil laugh villains use in movies and end up killing myself in shame when I realize what I've done.I peeked at them and saw their captain, Hyuuga Neji, glance at me. I gave him an awkward smile and communicated through sign language to not let Lee-san look my way. He nodded showing he understood and called Lee-san's attention. It pays to have cool friends!

"He has his reasons Lee. Now why don't you go on ahead and get our plays at Gai-sensei's office. We need it in order for us to memorize it fully," he paused then added "I wonder if you can get to our dorm earlier than we do if you do that?"

"YOSH! Of course respectful captain! I will do as you say and reach our humble abode earlier than you or I will run 30 laps in the school soccer field this afternoon!" Lee-san nodded for emphasis and sprinted his way to the gate.

I smiled at my current hero for the moment, "Thank you soooo much Nej! I owe you one!"

"It's alright Sakura. I'd say we're even after you saved me from Tenten's wrath that one time," he looked at me, amused. "Does Lee scare you that much?"

"Not really, it's just too early to deal with him," Naru got my attention after that. He was looking rather confused at something beside me. I looked at what he was looking at and saw the almighty Uchiha bending down to carry my overnight bag.

"Sasucakes? What are you doing?" I reached for it and tugged. "Let go."

He raised his eyebrow and smirked. "You slept at Ino's last night. Get this after your class," the shorter version for "Karin txted me and told me you were at Ino's. Why are you bringing your whole house here in school? You are so foolish! I will put this bag in my dorm room and you will retrieve it after your classes."

I sighed for the nth time, "Did Karin tell you? And I can't leave this in your room; you still have classes after my last subject," I can see on the corner of my eye that his companions were leaving already. Naru was winking at me and Nej was shaking his head hiding a small smile. What's up with that?

"Its okay, my dorm mates will let you in," he then proceeded to grab Cherry and remove the notebooks and pens I needed for class and handed it to me.

I had no choice but to accept my things, wondering how he knew what notebooks to get. If I deny him of what he wants, I'll surely be late for class. "Crap! I'll be late for Anko-sensei's class!" I ran off leaving him behind. I didn't get to hear his amused chuckle. It also slipped my mind that he was going to let me choose which one of his latest bed-mates was to be his flavor of the week that day.

* * *

Aaaaaaaaaannnd that's it!Hope you enjoyed guyz! And please leave a review if you have time. (^_^)


	4. get me out of here

Yo! Here I am again with another chapter

Here I'll introduce my side pairings aside from sasusaku and add in other characters as well. Next chapter will probably be the last of my "character introduction" chapters and then I'll focus more on the main pairing.

illneverknow : I give you lots of hugs for liking the story. Hope you continue on reading and giving me reviews to fuel my crazy mind to write more. =)

EndlessFlame911: I'm happy that you liked the story so far. I agree that it's a bit low for Sasuke to do that, he's a jerk to Sakz and he doesn't even know it. And yes, Neji has a not so little brotherly love for Sakura. Sak's Akatsuki bros will have more appearances in later chapters. =)

woodbyne: believe me, having overprotective big brothers is not that nice sometimes. I should know, I have to deal with 3 of them. I could give you one of them if you like (^_^). I'm glad you approve of the amount of angst. When I first made that up I thought it was a bit overboard. You can hit Sasuke if you like. I felt like hitting him too when I wrote that. lol. You're right in saying that Sasu did do more than just make her walk in the rain. I'm still in the process of writing that though. ;)

Thanks for the review guys! Hope you like this next chapter.

naruto isn't mine.

* * *

**Chapter 4: get me out of here  
**

"You did well?" a girl with pearly white eyes asked me after Biology.

"I'm not sure Hina," I crinkled my nose and pouted. "I was out of breath when I got in class and I sort of blacked out or something. I honesty couldn't remember a thing about everything I studied last night and this morning!" I wailed. I'm 99% sure that I failed that quiz! Stupid Sasucakes and his stupid bag stealing tendencies!

We were walking down the corridor smiling occasionally to acquaintances and familiar faces. We're headed to our usual hang out place, the grand stand. We proclaimed it "our spot" because A) It was directly facing the soccer field, B) It's surrounded by trees so it's a bit cool, very conducive for studying or lazing around. C) Its spacious and well equipped with the mats the judo and tae kwon do team use (the team captain, my friend Tennie, is very lazy and fails to return the equipment to the proper storage area). The first requirement is of course for the Shinobis, the second is for me Hina, Shika and Shino, and the last one is for Tenten, Chouji and Ino for their stunts.

When we arrived Shikamaru and Ino were already there. Shika was leaning against the wall with his eyes closed while Ino was sleeping with her head in his lap. Shika's hands were gently playing with Ino's hair. I smiled and took a picture using my camera phone. I heard Hina giggle beside me. I looked at her and we exchanged a dreamy glance. I already knew what she was going to say so I beat her to it.

"I know, right?" I sighed and leaned my head on her shoulder. "We would never get to the point wherein someone we love will do that with us," I pouted and she laughed merrily.

"At least we're not one of their fan girls who go gaga over them?" she reasoned. I rolled my eyes at her. "Okay fine. At least they have no idea that we are one of their fan girls. They don't think of us as low lives that would follow their every bidding. There, satisfied?" she amended. I laughed and pulled her so we could sit in front of Shika.

The lazy boy opened his eyes and when he saw us he gestured for us to keep quiet. "Lower your voices," he whispered. "I don't want her to wake up yet."

"Why Shika?" I asked. "You want the Pig to have enough rest? Are you worried that she would get sick from waking up super early for Shinobis' training? Awwww how sweet of you!" I pinched him in the cheek. Hina was smiling and nodding her head indicating that she agreed with me.

"SHHHHHH!" he covered my mouth with his hand. "If she wakes up, she'll start complaining about not getting to style her hair and do her make up properly due to the schedule Gai-sensei gave them, something about not having enough time or something. Tch, troublesome woman!" my mouth was still covered so I wasn't able to warn him that his girlfriend was already awake. Awake and starting to get pissed that she was being called a troublesome woman again.

Hina was about to tell him to stop but he continued. "I don't understand her. Why does she have to style her hair so bad? She still looks beautiful even if she doesn't do anything to it. And she doesn't need make up to look pretty; she's clearly one of the prettiest girls here sans make up. I don't see the purpose of her action. Troublesome!" My mouth was released because our blond companion jumped him and kissed him senseless.

Hina and I couldn't help but laugh at Shika's face after the kiss. His look was in between surprise and boredom. "I was supposed to punch you for that troublesome comment but you earned your way to my good graces again. I love you Shika-kun!" Ino announced, still hugging her man.

"Tch, I love you too you troublesome woman."

"What did you just call me?" Ino held both his ears while shouting at his face. I cracked up and held my stomach.

"Are you being manhandled again Shikamaru?" Naruto arrived and squeezed himself in between me and Hina. "Hi Sakura-chan! Hi Hinata-chan! How are my favorite ladies doing today?" he greeted, placing his arms on our shoulders and held us close. Ino snorted while I laughed at Hina's reaction. Her blush was so freaking obvious it's a miracle Naru doesn't notice. Well, he IS King Oblivious so it's no surprise.

I smelled something nice before I felt somebody sit beside me. I looked at Sasucakes and sighed. It's obvious that he just had a shower. He was wearing a dark blue shirt with the Uchiha crest at the back and the standard black uniform pants male students wore. I really like his after shower smell. He smelled like the soap he used and something else. I can't pinpoint what it is so I simply call it the "Sasuke-scent". It was really hard stopping myself from burying my nose in his shirt. I gave myself a pat on the back mentally for my self control. He got hold of my Biology notebook, exchanging it with Chemistry and Advanced Calculus. He didn't say anything. He just looks straight through the trees in front of us.

"Hey guys! Guess what?" Tennie came almost bouncing up and down while holding onto Neji's arm. "Gai-sensei informed me that we, the amazing athletes of Konoha High, are to have a retreat this weekend, something about youthful teamwork development and all that shiznat."

We were all members of the school's varsity. Most of the boys played soccer except Shino who preferred swimming; he held a good amount of love in wearing swimming goggles, and Chouji who's really good at wrestling. Tenten had judo and Tae Kwon Do together with Hina-yep, the gentlest girl I know kicks ass at martial arts. Ino's a member of the volleyball team aside from being a cheerleader. The Pig is so conscious of her figure that she does all she could to have as much physical activity as possible, without ruining her poise of course. I myself am a member of the ladies soccer team, the Kunoichis. The other girls are practically part of my team because they are usually present in almost all my practices and even play with my team sometimes. It just sucks that we lost to Sound High in the semi-finals.

"Where?" the newly arrived Kiba, with his dog Akamaru and bestfriend Shino, asked. "And Sakura, you might want to hide if you don't want your aspiring boyfriend to smother you with his undying love with a thousand burning suns," he added while helping the blushing Hina up to stand.

It didn't take a minute before a flash of green caught my eye. I made an "oof" sound when Lee-san tackled me. "Sweet Cherry Blossom! I have been looking for you in the entire academy. I almost thought that you didn't feel youthful today and called in sick! I was about to phone your house when I bumped into Sai," I flinched at the name but otherwise remained calm. The others looked at me in concern and I could feel Sasucakes straighten his back and grunt. "He told me that you were heading here with Hinata-chan".

"So the stupid bastard is back and is a stalker now?" Naru asked while standing up. "Where did you see him Lee? I need to talk to that pale-assed jerk."

Lee-san stood and was about to accompany Naru when Tennie stopped them. "Do you guys really wanna do that?" the other boys except Sasucakes and Shika (who was doing his best to doze off, that lazy ass!) were following Naru's action too. "It's been a year and all."

"We know it's been a year Tenten but he hasn't returned to school for almost a year too!" Naru replied with his fist clenched. "Probably too guilty for what he did to Sakura-chan".

"Naru its okay," I placated him. "I'm okay now," I smiled weakly at them. "It's no big deal."

"No big deal?" Ino asked appalled. "I was there in your entire sob fest forehead! I was there when you turned into a machine and distanced yourself from us! I was the one who heard your sobs at night for weeks! And you made me feel real bad because I know I couldn't do anything to make you feel better."

"Shut up Pig! It wasn't that bad! And I only cried for about a day! It wasn't like it was the end of the world. And it's not his fault okay? I was the one who told him he could have sex with anyone as long as the one he does it with wasn't me. It's my fault not his!" I hissed at her.

"You told him what?" Sasucakes asked. I almost didn't hear him; he said it with his voice so low that if he wasn't beside me I wouldn't have heard.

I turned to him and saw that he was beyond pissed. His eyes were piercing and I gulped. I hate it when he's mad. It makes me want to break down and cry. It takes me back to when he almost got us killed in a car crash because he got a surprise of a lifetime seeing Karin half naked on her couch with a random guy.

"Ahmmm..I uhhh.. ahmmm.. Please don't kill me Sasucakes! I didn't mean it! Its just that I thought I wasn't ready and felt that it would be unfair for him to get himself a girlfriend that wouldn't give in all the way," I held his arm for emphasis. I don't wanna die yet! What did I do to get him pissed?

He looked at me with one of his eyebrows raised. "Hn," he looked at the others and said "It's alright. Don't bother Sai. I'll talk to him," he held my elbows from behind and guided me out of our circle.

"But Teme!" Naru whined.

"Uchiha, tell me when you plan on seeing Sai. I want to have a word with him as well," I glanced back and saw that Nej was a little bit pissed too.

Tennie huffed and held his face. "It's okay Neji. They have their reasons for breaking up with each other," she gave him a peck on the lips. "Now calm down and relax. Your hair is getting frizzy," Neji smiled and sat down with her on the mats.

I sighed and looked away.

"What's wrong?" he released my elbows and walked beside me.

I looked at him, taking sight of his perfect face his beautiful eyes. I never get tired of looking at his eyes. It was so deep and held so much pent up emotions. It makes me smile when he shows his "real" feelings. He keeps it bottled up inside and rarely lets it out. "It's nothing important," he raised his eyebrow at that. Psh! Him and his non-verbal communication. "See this?" I showed him the picture of Shika and Ino I took earlier. He looked at me and shrugged. I sighed again and continued "Then there was Tennie and Nej!" I raised my hands in my face and blew air out of my mouth.

"What did all of them do to get you all frustrated?"

"Sasucakes! Don't you see? Everyone is happy and I'm miserable! They have their own "someone" and I have no one!" I raised my hands in emphasis. "Even Hina has someone!" He looked at me and I continued. "Like you don't see the love triangle she has with Naru and Kiba!" He put his hands in his pockets. "I want to have my own someone too!" we stopped walking and I realized that we were in front of Chemlab1, my next class. "I just feel so alone right now," I whispered. I looked at him and saw that he was reading something from his cell phone. Stupid jerk! Here I am telling him my sorrows and he's not even paying attention. I'll get back at him somehow. If he suddenly appears in my window next time I'm going to bang it in his face! Let's see how he would feel after that!

Just then a redhead with dark eyes got out of the classroom.

"Hey Sakura! What's up?" Tayuya, my lab partner for the semester, chirped. I said hi back and smiled at her. She's really smart and I admire her for her outlook in life. We sort of have the same views and we get along well. She always brings food for me and our other seatmates in class. Her dad owns a restaurant and was business partners with Chouji's dad. Speaking of Chouji, I didn't see him today. He was probably at wrestling practice again.

I was about to introduce Tayuya to Sasucakes when she tugged his shirt and kissed him. "Hi handsome," she rasped after the kiss. My mind went overdrive. Shit! Was Tayuya the redhead he was currently banging?

The door opened again and a brunette with jade eyes appeared. It's Ami, my lab partner last sem. She and I got off quite nicely because we share the same temperament. My eyes almost bulged out from their sockets when she also reached for Sasucakes and kissed him. Kissed him torridly at that! My fingers went cold and I started taking deep breaths. This cannot be happening to me! It just can't! The girl I saw with Sasucakes yesterday couldn't have been Ami! I knew I should have looked longer to see her face instead of running for dear life towards the mall exit!

"Good morning hot stuff. How have you been?" she caressed Sasuke's raven locks. "When we woke up, you weren't there," she didn't even notice me jaw-slacked beside the boy.

My throat hurt like hell and I would give anything to get out of this place! I need to scram and fast! I could feel tears prickling my eyes that I had to tilt my head upwards to prevent them from falling.

"Sakz," that voice. That voice that I dream of almost every night is calling for me. I didn't look at him. I know it pisses him off when he talks and I don't pay attention. But I simply couldn't care right now. He's going to make me choose between Ami and Tayuya for him! Is he freaking mental? I continued looking up the ceiling instead. "Sakz, look at me when I'm talking to you," I think I'm going to be sick. I could feel my stomach flipping over. I have to get out of here!

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Hmmnn.. This chappie got a little longer than planned. Anyhow, I hoped you liked it. Please review!


	5. running fast stupid things i do take 2

Here I am again with another chapter. Sasuke is a bit OOC here. (^^,)

First off thank you for those who took time to review.

EndlessFlame911: I sure hope this next chapter would still hold your interest. If not for your first review I wouldn't have had continued writing. Thank you! (^_^)

Illneverknow: Saku does deserve someone better. It just sucks that she's in love with Sasu though.

annoyed girl: lol. He is, isn't he? But I hope you won't take it against him though, there _was _a time when he wasn't such a cold hearted player. (^_^)

woodbyne: OMG I love your reviews! Makes me smile and stuff. I really tried to finish this chap before your test. I hope you get to read it before you take it. I wouldn't want you to fail because of me (^_^) I hope you do well!

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naruto isn't mine.

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_italics:flashback_

**Chapter 5: running fast( stupid things I do take 2)**

"_Sakz," that voice. That voice that I dream of almost every night is calling for me. I didn't look at him. I know it pisses him off when he talks and I don't pay attention. But I simply couldn't care right now. He's going to make me choose between Ami and Tayuya for him! Is he freaking mental? I continued looking up the ceiling instead. "Sakz, look at me when I'm talking to you," I think I'm going to be sick. I could feel my stomach flipping over. I have to get out of here!_

Ami noticed my predicament and touched my forehead with the back of her hand. "Are you okay Sakura? You look a bit green?" I could sense a bit of worry I her voice.

"Excuse me; I think I need a trip to the ladies' room," I walked real fast away from them. When I was out of the building I went on a full blown sprint and ran as fast as I could. I didn't care that my school shoes were hurting my feet. I was hell bent on leaving and fast. Tears began trailing down my cheek and memories came flooding back.

"_Mom have you seen my new soccer shoes? The red ones Sasori-nii bought?" I shouted while throwing everything I got from my cabinet. Where the hell are those spikes? I'm going to be late for my game!_

"_They're in the living room dear!" Mom answered from the kitchen. "Sasori-chan told me to tell you not to use them for you game yet, said you have to get used to wearing them while practicing so you won't get blisters during the game."_

_I raced to the living room and paused upon seeing someone there. Sasucakes was there holding my "game bag". He was already in his full Shinobi regalia, complete with green and black face paint. I smiled and approached him. "Hey there!" he looked at me and stood._

"_I dreamt of you last night," huh? Did he just day that he dreamt of me? I stared at him for a moment. He was so serious; there wasn't a trace of humor in his eyes. My heart started to pump real fast. It felt like it wanted to jump out of my chest! That week he was extra attentive and extra caring towards me. He would walk me to our house from school and sometimes have dinner with me when my parents aren't home. He even cooked breakfast for me the day before. He arrived at my house really early and prepared pancakes and omelets (the only meal he can cook). We ate it together before we went to school. I really didn't want to put any romantic notions to his actions because I have a feeling that he was just in a phase. His parents were on a cruise to the Caribbean and Itachi was on his 1__st__ year in college. He was alone in his house and he needed my company. He must have been lonely in that big house of theirs. He really should transfer to the men's dorm inside the campus. At least he'll have Naru and the guys there to keep him entertained._

"_What was the dream about?"_

_He looked at me and shook his head as if trying to clear it. "Its nothing," he held my elbow with his free hand from behind and walked me towards the door. "We have to go Haruno-san. I will return your daughter after the games," I laughed when I heard my father say "You better be sure to bring her back in one piece young man." _

_We were walking silently towards school. Our house was only a block away after all. My mind was conjuring lots and lots of scenarios for the dream he mentioned. What if in the dream he realized that he was in love with me? That's why he's being uncharacteristically quiet. Not that he's a chatterbox but he kind of makes me talk to fill the silence. Then if I talk his ear off he would try his best to make me shut up. The cycle will then repeat itself until we part ways._

_Wait! Maybe he did love me, or maybe started to realize that he is? Why would he spend almost all of his free time with me? Bringing me lunch and even cooking me breakfast? He even watched A Walk to Remember with me the other night even though he loathes chick flicks! He was appalled though when I got his shirt wet from my tears after the movie. Wait a second? If he's in love with me what am I supposed to tell Karin? She may have numerous boy toys but she kind of likes him! I can't hurt her!_

"_What are you murmuring about?" oh he's talking to me. I looked at him and crinkled my nose._

"_Huh?" I didn't realize that we were already at the school gates. Konoha High was packed with students from different schools. "I didn't say anything," he looked at me skeptically and raised an eyebrow. _

"_Hey you two!" Kiba was running towards us. "What took you so long?" He tried taking my things from Sasucakes but was denied access. Kiba or Naru were usually the ones to help me with my things. They swore they would help me in any way they can ever since that time when I saved their lives by tutoring them. If I didn't do so they would have failed miserably and their moms were really scary when disappointed. Kiba shrugged and asked jokingly "Did ya tutor him too Sakura?" I laughed and we proceeded to our respective benches._

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"_YOSH! Nice game team!" our coach, Konoha's green beast, Maito Gai shouted at the top of his lungs. Him and Lee-san look scarily alike I was surprised they weren't related. "We will meet again same time tomorrow. Rest well and continue to be youthful."_

_It was past twilight and I was about to leave when Sasucakes stopped me. He told me to follow him to the soccer field. When we reached half court there was a blanket and a picnic basket. Am I dreaming? Is he finally going to confess his love or something? _

"_Sasucakes?" He was looking at me with an unreadable facial expression. It was like he was gauging my reaction. Gods I'm so nervous! I've been waiting years for this! I've wanted to hear those three words since I was 5! Well at 5 I didn't know I wanted to hear it but I know I wanted to be with him forever and ever!_

_He held my shoulders and made me sit on the blanket. He then sat beside me and opened the basket. "I have all your favorite foods here so your scary brothers won't accuse me of making you starve."_

"_My brothers aren't scary. They're nice," I felt my hands starting to shake. My nerves are getting the best of me._

"_They hate me," he lied down and stared at the sky. "Lie down. You won't be able to see them if you sit up."_

"_They don't hate you Sasucakes," I lied down beside him. "They just don't like it when I spend my time with boys aside from them. What are we doing here anyway?" The curiosity is killing me! If he's going to return my feelings I am going to die! I'm gonna die a happy death!_

"_Tch! They glare at me every time I visit your house," they do? Oh I'm gonna gut them real bad! I didn't know that they do that! "I thought they were just being over protective brothers but I noticed that they don't emit the same aura to the dobe and the others," he nodded as finality "They hate me," if their stupid over protectiveness is going to ruin my chances with Sasucakes I'm going to burn their precious rooms! "Look!" he pointed towards the sky._

_I looked up and saw a single star falling. "Hey! It's a falling star!"_

_He held my left hand and put it in his pocket."Make a wish before it disappears," I smiled at his antics. His mom told us when we were 6 that if we want the falling star to grant our wish, our hand should be at our pocket, so the wish wouldn't get away. Ever since that day he always wore pants with pockets._

"_What's your wish?" I asked him. I'm going to get as much information as possible from him. He seldom has his "talkative" moods so I have to take advantage. _

"_To have the girl of my dreams," his eyes were closed and he had a small smile "Crap! Now my wish won't come true!" He glared at me. I laughed and looked at the sky again._

"_Why is that?" This side of him is really fun to be with. _

"_Because you made me tell it!" He removed our hands from his pocket, frowning. "You're not supposed to tell others your wish or it won't come true!" He glared at the sky as if willing it to produce more falling stars. "I guess we'll just have to catch as much stars as possible to reverse it."_

"_You're crazy Sasucakes!"_

"_No I'm not," he closed his eyes again. "I just don't know how to talk to girls you know. Every time I try I just say something stupid at best," what is he talking about? I'm a girl yet he talks to me just fine! _

"_Are you trying to tell me that I'm not girl enough for you?" I'm pissed! Here I was expecting that he would confess his love for me and what does he do? He insinuates that I'm a boy!_

"_I didn't say that! You're the only girl I feel comfortable with! And besides, I've known you forever so you don't count as a girl, you count as my friend," oh so that's how it is! When he comes to me bringing a girlfriend I'm going to wring her neck! I hate whoever she is already! "That's why you have to help me catch falling stars so my wish would come true. So you won't have to deal with my nonsense anymore" _

_I wanted to tell him that I want to deal with all his nonsense. I want to deal with everything he has to offer, be it bad or good. Instead I huffed and pouted "Fine! But half of the wishes will be mine okay?" I am going to beg the falling star to give him to me and I'm going to make sure that he won't feel alone anymore._

That happened five years ago but it's still fresh from my memory. If only I could turn back time, I would definitely do it! I want _my _old Sasucakes back, the one who respected girls and didn't jump from one bed to another, the one who believed in happily ever afters and magic. I miss him so much! It hurts when I see him like this. I continued to run towards the soccer field. I need to breathe! My eyes sting and my feet are killing me! That and I wanted to puke!

When I managed to pass the Quad someone called my name. I stopped and caught my breath putting my hands on my knees taking deep breaths. I heard footsteps coming closer and saw a pair of sneakers thrust onto me. I looked up and saw Sai. He smiled his smile, a smile that didn't reach his eyes.

"Saw the whole Chemlab fiasco. I still had the keys to your locker. I figured you'd need this," he explained gesturing to my worn out running shoes.

"Sai," I whispered, smiling sadly. "I missed you."

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hmmmnnnn.. It's kinda weird writing Sasu like that. tsk..

I bet you're wondering what's behind Sai and Sakura's "lovestory". I'll get to that in later chapters.

I'll say sorry in advance for any mistakes. I made this at 3am and I'm a little bit woozy. Nevertheless, thanks for reading and please leave a review.


	6. kitty

hi guys! i'm back!

This chapter is a little different from the previous ones. It is centered on another character's POV. This happened way before the events in chapter 1.

crazymel2008: wow! It's like you read my mind! Before I posted chapter 5 I already decided to have chapter 6 as someone else's POV. I won't say who it is but it's a bit obvious. Thanks for the review! =)

illneverknow: I agree. Sasu is stupid! And blind! But let's hope that he stops his stupidity in time before our dear Saku gets fed up and gives up on him.

woodbyne: I hope you aced that test. (^_^)

haha Sasu's hair does look like a chicken's ass!=) I'll explain his change of heart in the future.

I'll try to squeeze Sasu's dream in later chaps for you. And the glaring thing of Saku's bros started since they were little. They didn't "trust" Sasu with their precious sister. (^_^)

EndlessFlame911: Yep, Sasu was sensitive as a kid. I'll try to explain why he changed in future chaps. On to Sai, I haven't really decided if he should be bad or good. Right now I'm trying to write him "neutrally" – (^_^)

What do you guys think? Should I have Sai as a good guy or a bad guy?

enjoy reading!

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Naruto isn't mine.

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**Chapter 6: Kitty**

"You can go around the campus if you like." My adoptive parent, Shizune, stated while typing away in her computer. She works at Konoha University as the secretary of the School Directress, Hashirama Tsunade. Said Directress is fond of gambling and drinking so my mother is usually the one saddled with her responsibilities. She's always busy so I rarely see her at home, thus, the purpose of my visit.

I nodded and headed towards the door. "Will I see you later at dinner?" I love her cooking.

"I'm not sure. If I finish this report maybe I could." She sighed, stretching her neck from side to side. "Will you be alright?" she added. I doubt that she'll be able to cook for us tonight. The papers stacked on her table were worth two days of work.

"It's okay. I can manage." Ever since I was a kid, I had to rely on my own abilities. I lived in the Refuge for the Homeless for as long as I can remember. It was until 9 years ago that I was adopted. I was 8 at that time and was a bit sickly then so Shizune had me home schooled. My tutor, Danzou, taught me everything, from Math, cooking to martial arts.

I roamed around campus and found myself under the shade of a tree facing the high school soccer field. I put my bag down and looked around. No one was minding my presence so I sat down and got my sketch pad. There were students practicing all kinds of sports and I could hear a man in varying degrees of green clothing shouting something about youth, a coach, maybe? There were a few boys snickering behind him.

I got myself comfortable and started looking for a subject for my new sketch. Drawing had always been my way of entertaining myself when I got lonely. I was mostly alone because our caretaker at the shelter didn't allow me to play outside. I got sick real quick and they couldn't afford trips to the hospital with the meager budget they had. As I got older, it became a means of expression. I draw what I feel since I rarely have the chance to converse with other people. I don't feel the need to surround myself with others and I'm fairly content at being left alone. Silence somewhat calms me.

There was this girl near the goal post in front of me. She was looking at something in the middle of the field. No, she wasn't looking at something; rather, she was looking at someone. She was rubbing her hands together seemingly wanting to warm them, taking deep breaths and she looked like she wanted to cry. I was intrigued so I continued observing her while drawing at the same time.

She had long pink hair fixed into a high ponytail, nerdy glasses and a not so little forehead. She's a small little thing and by the way she was looking I could compare her to a little kitten wanting to bolt. There were so many feelings passing through her face in a single minute. Not five minutes later she broke into a run around the field. She didn't stop running until a blonde cheerleader practically forced her to stop. She then fell to the ground and just lied there, panting. Hhmmmmm, interesting. I smiled to my self. I didn't notice that I had drawn a scared little kitty with big, watery eyes. I made a mental note to color its fur pink and have its eyes green when I get home.

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"So how did your little school tour go?" mother made it home before dinner and was now preparing the dining table. "Genma! Dinner!" she called out.

I heard footsteps and saw a man with dark drown hair enter the kitchen. "Hey squirt!" my adoptive father, Shiranui Genma, messed my hair and sat on the table. "Did you have fun at Mom's workplace?" he looked at the table and clapped his hands, "Pumpkin broth! Yummy!" I like him. He's funny and childish at times. He still tends to treat me like a child and he does his best to annoy his wife, says its fun to witness her violent reactions. I personally think he is a masochist.

We seldom eat as a family since he travels a lot so its a bit refreshing to be with them. "It was fine mother, father." We started eating.

"Did you find a good subject or a new inspiration perhaps?" father wiggled his eyebrows at me.

I stared blankly at him. He does this almost every time. "No father, I did not find myself a girlfriend"

He frowned and huffed, "You should have one already! You're 17 and if you don't let those hormones of yours out, it might-ooof!" he didn't finish his sentence for his hair was yanked by our female companion.

"Quit promoting pre-marital copulation!" she put her hands on her hips and glared at the object of her annoyance, "teens do lots of it without much encouragement already!" she turned to me and sighed. "Don't listen to him, he's clearly not thinking straight."

"It's alright." I know better than to believe him. Last time I did, a dog bit me and I fell on the stairs. "I didn't find myself a girlfriend but I did find a very interesting kitty."

"A kitty?" my parents chorused.

"Yes." I nodded and smiled. "Can I visit you again tomorrow?"

My mother raised her eyebrow but nodded nonetheless. "Of course! You can visit as often as you want." She said touching my shoulder.

I smiled and continued eating, all the while thinking about a certain pinkette.

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The next morning I headed directly to the soccer field. I saw the blonde cheerleader but "Kitty" was no where in sight. I sat down on my spot yesterday and waited. Ten portrait and six landscape sketches later, she still didn't show. Maybe she didn't go to this school and she was just visiting somebody here the day before. I waited again for thirty minutes. After that, I lost hope and sighed.

I stood and headed towards the school exit. I was putting my sketchbook in my bag when somebody bumped me.

"So sorry!" the redhead who bumped me was still running when she apologized. If not for her hair and her eye color, I would have sworn she was "Kitty". They look a lot like each other, the redhead only a few inches taller and the glasses she wore were different from the nerdy glasses "Kitty" wears. They must be sisters. She wore a different uniform from the other girls so she must be from another school.

There goes my new found interest. It would be stupid for me to go to the other schools to find her. I can come and go to Konoha U because of my mother. I doubt the other schools would allow such. I sighed and went on my way. Maybe she'll visit again tomorrow.

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hmmnnn.. In who's POV do you want the next chapter?

thanks for reading and please leave a review! (^_^)


	7. red vs pink

hello!

I'm back with chapter 7. This chapter is a continuation of the events in chapter 6 which happened way before chapter 1. I'm sorry if some of you guys got confused with my changing timelines. I wrote it this way so i wouldn't have to have numerous flashbacks. I personally think having little flashbacks will not be able to explain clearly what happened. (^_^)

illneverknow: Sai is sad and he's pretty lonely too. So is our Saku. They need to help each other out. (^_^)

EndlessFlame911: lol. The important part there is that you figured it out. (^_^)

Thank you sooo much for reviewing in each chapter. I'm still new to this and I need a lot of feedbacks to make my writing better. And I love responding to your reviews! Keep it coming!

Honestly I myself was also undecided on who's POV it would be this chap so I had it in two characters.

woodbyne: yep you got it! It is Sai.

And a big BOO to your teacher! She's a meanie if she made you learn/study the wrong lessons than that which actually came out on your test.

This chapter is still a "filler" chapter. I still have another chapter to go before I continue with the "which girl do I bang" continuation. Then Saku will go in "angst mode" again. Your love for angst clearly shows that you love drama and that you can relate with the characters' experiences. I hope I can satisfy your "angst hunger" in this story. (^_^) This is by far the longest review I received! Thank you so much

so here it is! enjoy!

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naruto isn't mine

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**chapter 7: red vs. pink**

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"Why so bum chum?" A blonde boy asked me. He flashed me a wide grin and thrust his hand in front of me. "Hi! I'm Uzumaki Naruto! Are you new here?" Who is this person? Does he not understand the concept of personal space? Boundaries?

I looked at him pointedly "No, I'm not interested in you," I turned around and headed for Mother's office. I heard him sputter but I continued walking. His indignant "HEY! I'm not gay!" was heard all over the corridor.

"Naruto! There you are! Have you seen Sakura?" I turned around and saw the redhead who bumped me last week. I stopped and debated if I should approach her or not. After all, I'm not 100% sure that she and "Kitty" were related. I sighed and turned around. I changed my mind; I won't go to Mother's office. Instead I'll proceed straight to the soccer field.

Ever since that day I've been coming back to the place I've seen "Kitty" but with no such luck. I've finished nine portraits of her, mostly without her glasses. She had beautiful eyes. Her glasses somewhat shield their beauty. I've only seen her once but her face was etched on my memory, the hurt, the longing, the love was there, all for the world to see. It would be a waste if her feelings were unrequited.

I hope I could meet her. So that I can have a reason for the dreams I have at night. I have to prove to myself that she is "worthy" to be dreamed of. If I meet her and she turns out to be one of those bimbos who follow me around then it would be good. I won't have conflicting feelings anymore. It would be easier to let go and have peace in my own head. I tried to forget her on the fifth day of my "search" but my mind keeps telling me to continue finding her. Never had I been more determined to meet a person. My brother always told me that having "what if's" was a foolish way of living. It would be better to do something now than not doing it and live a decade wondering what would have happened had you done it.

I wonder if I'll be able to see even a glimpse of her today. I sure hope so.

I sat down on my usual spot and got my sketchbook. I flipped the pages and stopped at page wherein I drew "Kitty" under a tree, looking at the stars. Her eyes were dreamy and she had a small smile. On her right hand she was holding a rose about to bloom, on her left she had her glasses. I was contemplating on adding a few finishing touches on the drawing that I didn't notice a stray ball coming my way.

"LOOK OUT!" The warning came too late and the object hit my sketchbook. It was thrown a few feet away from me. I was about to stand when somebody picked it up.

"I told you to refrain from always using your right foot," a raven haired male scolded whoever it was who kicked the ball. My eyes were focused on my sketchbook he was holding so I have yet to see who he was talking to.

"But Sasucakes I didn't use my right foot, I used my left! That's why it didn't go in the goal!" Came the frustrated reply. I looked up and was quite surprised when I saw her. "I'm so sorry; I didn't mean to hit you," she offered me a shy smile and I stood up relieved that I finally found her. One week of coming back to this place was finally rewarded.

"If you had followed my instruction earlier this would not have happened."

"If I didn't follow your stupid instruction I would have had that ball in the net! You know I can't aim well with my left foot but you insisted that I should use it!" She huffed and looked at me apologetically. "I wouldn't have hit him, again I am so sorry," again she offered me a timid smile. I couldn't help but look at her eyes, they were very expressive. I wanted to remove the thick lenses that were covering it.

"If you obeyed me and trained your left foot enough you would have a better aim. Then the chances of you having a goal would be far better than hitting innocent bystanders sitting twelve feet away the goal post," in my peripheral vision, I saw him look at my sketchbook. He looked up, "Do you two know each other?" I'm not quite sure but did he sound angry? He was scowling.

"Huh?" My muse looks cute while confused. I have to draw that expression sometime. No. I'll draw it once I get my sketchbook back. "What are you talking about Sasucakes?" She tilted her head and looked at "Raven" questioningly, her nose crinkled. I'm definitely going to draw that.

"Excuse me but I would like to have my book back," I extended my hand to "Raven". He looked at me suspiciously and handed me my belonging. I turned to "Kitty" and smiled at her. "Do you always have your glasses on?" My hands are itching to take them off.

"Most of the time," she cocked her head to the other side. "You look familiar. Have we met somewhere before?"

"I don't believe so. If we did meet in the past, I wouldn't have had forgotten your name," I extended my hand to her. "I'm Sai," we shook hands and she smiled.

"I'm Sakura," she gestured to Raven, "And this guy here is Sasuke."

I didn't pay attention to the third person in the conversation. "But how do you play soccer if you have glasses?" I touched the specs and took it off her. "You might break them," there, I can see her jade orbs properly. I handed her the glasses.

She was looking at her friend with her eyebrow raised "Are you okay Sasucakes? What are you scowling about?" she then looked at me and sighed "I'm a little bit far sighted," she wiped grass strains from her glasses. "And I'm so used to having them on that I forget to remove them before practice," she went around me and went back in front "I didn't hit you right? You're not hurt or anything?" Her concerned eyes were assessing me. I felt a smile tugging at my lips. I feel that she has all the requirements to become a "mother hen", I should know, I live with one. Mother still baby's me sometimes.

"Don't be stupid. Are you that blind to see that the only thing the ball wiped out was his book? Tch, annoying!" The guy named Sasuke then walked away.

"Hey where are you going? You were supposed to teach me the bicycle kick!" She didn't get an answer. "What is wrong with him?" She whispered to herself. She turned to me and waved "It was nice meeting you Sai. I have to get going. I think my friend is having PMS again," she ran to catch up to her friend.

"Will you be here tomorrow?" I need to see her again.

Her companion turned and glared at me. "No she will not be here tomorrow," he said in a low voice. Sakura laughed and turned to me.

"Yep! I need to practice my left kick so this guy here would get off my ass during training," she grinned and hit the raven playfully. "We have to go. Bye! Nice meeting you!" That and they were gone.

I sat down and smiled to myself. I just found myself a new inspiration, my muse. I feel that she would be the person I was looking for, the person to bring color to my dull life. It's been so long ever since I felt the need to be with someone. Ever since my family died, I have long given up in finding a companion, thinking that solitude was better. When I'm alone, no one can see me, no one can break me. I have convinced myself that being alone and feeling nothing was better than being with somebody and end up being hurt once they leave. But having her around me makes me want to feel again. She's like a breath of fresh air. And her face is like a canvass that erupts with various expressions. Her eyes convey so much that one could easily tell what her heart is yearning to say. She's not afraid to show the world of how she is feeling. I would also like to have that ability. She would teach me how to feel. She will show me how it is to love and be loved in return.

"Sakura," I looked at my sketchbook and wrote her name below my latest drawing of her.

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**Change of POV**

"Sakura!" We turned around and saw a redhead heading our way. Following her was the Dobe who was smiling knowingly.

"Karin! What are you doing here?" They had their customary hug and nonsense chitchat. "Don't you have classes? You know your GPA would be affected if you-"

"Oh shut it babe! I own the school!" Karin flipped her hair and turned to me. "They wouldn't dare lower my GPA just because of one measly day of not coming in," I smirked at her and she smirked back. "Hi gorgeous! I missed you," she went over me and hugged my arm. I felt rather than heard Sakz' sharp intake of breathe. Is she sick? I looked at her and observed. She looks okay. She seems to find the ground suddenly very interesting. What is wrong with her?

"Soooo what are you doing here Karin?" The Dobe hugged Sakz from behind and murmured something in her ear. She smiled sadly and nodded. Why is she sad? She was happily talking my ear off a while ago. "Aren't you supposed to be in Sound High wreaking havoc to the school population?" Why is he such a dobe? Deciding that its fine hugging anybody like that? Doesn't he respect people's sense of personal space? I glared at his arms, mentally ripping them off the pinkette's body.

"Ooooh big words!" Karin punched him and laughed. "Is that you Naruto? I'm surprised your brain hasn't turned to mush upon using too much of its neurons," she looked at Sakz. "Are you okay babe? Did somebody bully you again?" She looked around and added, "Where are they? I'm gonna kick their asses!" They have always been close. Kiba even thinks its extremely sexy seeing Karin practically drape herself on the pinkette every chance she gets. Sakz doesn't mind, used to the redhead's attention and touchy-feely quirks. The perv in Kiba dubbed their closeness as "lesbian tendencies". Sakz punched the living daylights out of him when she heard about it.

Karin looked at Sakz again and gasped "Oh my gosh! You took off your glasses! That's why you looked different! I was thinking that you cut your hair but it was the glasses!" She appraised her and smiled. "You look better," Sakz smiled and I couldn't help but smile with her. She does look better without her glasses. "But it shows your forehead though," the smile dropped and she sighed. "hmmm. Maybe we should go to the parlor across the school to get you bangs eh?" She tried to drag Sakz away but the Dobe stopped them.

"Maybe not today Karin, Sakura-chan needs to help me with our science project," science project? We already finished that last week. What is going on? Am I missing something? I looked at Sakz and she was rubbing her hands.

"Are you cold?" She looked at me and smiled weakly. She shook her head. Maybe she's sick? Why is she not telling me this? Just because there was this jerk that dared show interest in her, she would suddenly not include me in her life? When I see whats-his-name artist again I'm going to rearrange his face! "Whatever! Keep your secrets to yourself, I don't give a shit," there was something in her eyes that told me that something was wrong but I couldn't for the life of me pinpoint what it is and why she was acting that way. It lasted for about three seconds then her eyes hardened. She's mad at me now. Tch! What is wrong with her? I'll never understand women. First she was happily telling me about her day, she was even skipping while we were walking, then she goes all quiet and looking sick and finally, she goes all mad in a span of four minutes! "Let's go Karin," I went to the direction of our dorm without waiting for the redhead. I know she would follow. She always follows me.

Before we could get far I heard the Dobe shout "Sakura-chan! Let's get some food!" I could picture her expression right about now, she would refuse the offer. She's not really fond of the non-nutritious food the Dobe is addicted to. "No ramen I promise! Icecream and chocolates? My treat!" That she would like. Cookies and Cream flavored ice cream paired with milk chocolates always makes her day. Is she feeling ill? Why would the Dobe suggest that they eat her comfort food? He even offered to treat her? This not-knowing is getting on my nerves. I felt somebody hugging me.

"Sasu, I missed you," Karin. I never thought I would ever get to the point of having her. She was bestfriends with Sakz and she was continually throwing herself at me. I told Sakz this one time and she went silent mode on me for a month. She didn't go to our weekly gatherings and she refused to answer my phone calls. Had I known that she would react that way, I wouldn't have told her. I feel different when she's not around. I snap at everyone and everything. Itachi laughed at my face when I told him about it. "I didn't know you went swimming in De Nile foolish little brother. You should face your fear early. Or you'll remain the virgin that you are forever," I sputtered and then eventually cursed him.

Lesson to self: Never ever talk to Itachi about problems. The result is usually appalling.

Karin was always with me so I learned to appreciate her presence. She and Sakz had so much in common. Sakz was the only girl I could stand to be around with. She didn't make me feel awkward. I figured that since of both of them have many similarities then I could learn to be at ease with Karin. I didn't expect it to turn into something sexual though.

Karin is always "in heat", as Kiba would call it. She was my first and she opened my eyes to the pleasures a warm body can give. In time I got addicted to her and couldn't picture a day without her and our daily _activities_. Then we started formally going out. It's like she molded me into a different person, a person she can control. I didn't mind it though, its fun being controlled sometimes.

I have fond memories of her when we were kids. I still smile every time I remember her cry when she accidentally hurt Sakz. We were playing in the park and she pushed Sakz a little too hard on the swings that she fell. I was playing with Naruto and Gaara in the sandbox when that happened. I ran towards them and looked at the damage. I shouted for my big brother as loud as I could, I was even louder than Naruto. I was just 7 and I did not know what to do. Sakz didn't cry but she almost did when Itachi cleaned her wound. Her scary big brothers were not amused with her scraped knees. Sakz cracked up upon seeing Karin cry. "Why are you crying Karin?" The girl in question looked at the looming big brothers and she teared up more. "Your scary brothers will eat me," she whispered a little too loudly. Naruto still brings that memory up sometimes and we would end up laughing our asses off.

"Well if it isn't Sound High's queen bee here to claim her boy toy!"

"Shut up dogbreath!"

I didn't notice that we were already in front of my dorm. "I'll just change clothes, I'll be right back," I cannot take the chance of taking her inside. She'll ravish me in seconds. I can't have that with Kiba around. He'll rat it out to the others and then Sakz will then look at me with disappointed eyes. She makes me feel like I'm cheating on somebody, which is weird since Karin _is_ my girlfriend.

She is strongly against sex before marriage. Its better that way I guess. At least I won't worry about her getting it on with some random guy. It would be a long time before she gets married and it would give me enough time to make sure that her potential grooms are worthy. Why am I thinking about her? I changed my clothes and got my car keys. I have a hot redhead waiting for me outside and here I am thinking about my best female friend. Maybe it's because of the artist freak. Yes it's because of that. I don't trust her with that jerk. I'll give Sasori a call later to tell him about that good for nothing scumbag. Then I'll-wait. I have to stop thinking about this. I have a girlfriend to please downstairs.

Think redhead-not pinkette. Think of rumpled beds and a whole night of passion-not stargazing and harmless movie nights. Think of sexy smirks-not gentle smiles. Think of bars and booze-not ice cream and milk chocolate.

"Sasu? Are you okay?" Think Sasu-not Sasucakes.

Think Karin-not Sakura.

Fuck I'm going to murder that freak once I see him! He's making me think of stupid stuff! Why would I compare Sakz and Karin? I think there's something seriously wrong with me.

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Do you guys think that Sasu is beeing stupid? I personally think so. Stupid Sasucakes!

Should I continue with the flow of the story or should I change course?

hope you enjoyed! please leave a review! (^_^)


	8. snippets of moments

Yo! Back with chapter 8!

Here I'll focus on Sai and Saku's relationship as viewed by their friends. It took me a while to finish this. Hope you guys like it!

woodbyne: I'm glad you liked Naru and Saku's closeness. Sakura hasn't told anyone about her feelings for Sasuke but all her friends know about it. It's pretty obvious and only Sasu is blind enough not to see it. Stupid Sasucakes!

I'm starting to like Sai too! He was supposed to have only a minor role but its fun making Sasu jealous so yeah. (^_^) Next chapter I'll go back to my original timeline and you'll be able to read Angst!Saku again. Hope you'll like it.

Hahaha.. please don't kill your sister! I, too have the urge to kill my siblings sometimes when they do something like that to me. But I stop myself and think of other ways to get back at them. Sibling love-hate relationship!haha

Your review IS longer than the last one. Thanks for your awesome reviews! I also look forward to them each time I post a chapter! (^_^)

illneverknow: I'm so thankful that you liked the previous chapter. It's a relief that someone appreciates my work. Yey!

EndlessFlame911: I agree! Sasu is very oblivious! My bad, wrong choice of words. Hehe. Thank you for your review!

I viewed your profile and saw that you currently writing a GaaSaku. Hope I could read it soon!

enjoy reading!

**_bold italics: flashback_**

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naruto isn't mine

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**Chapter 8: snippets of moments**

_tooHOTforYOU: Ino, you already met Sakura's boy toy?_

_shopaholicBlonde: Boy toy?_

_tooHOTforYOU: You know. That guy that follows her around, the really hot raven?_

_shopaholicBlonde: Oh Sai? Yep, he introduced himself to us. Seems pretty serious about Forehead too. But Forehead is being stupid as usual. _

_tooHOTforYOU: Stupid? How?_

_shopaholicBlonde: I told her the guy likes her and she goes "What's there to like about me?"_

_tooHOTforYOU: We gotta do something to that self-esteem of hers._

_shopaholicBlonde: She's confident when you're not around Karin. If you would just stop making fun of her it would really help._

_tooHOTforYOU: Shut up! You're the one calling her Forehead! Some bestfriend you are!_

_shopaholicBlonde: Whatever. Gtg. Shika-kun is here. _

I logged out and met my lazy boyfriend half way. "What are we gonna do today?" I convinced him to meet me at he mall to do some shopping. I need somebody to carry the shopping bags I'll have later.

"I already got out of bed and got myself dressed. What more do you want me to do?" Great! How the hell did I end up with this lazy ass? Oh I fell in love with him! Why did I fall in love with him again? It's really hard to think of a reason when he's being this, this troublesome! Great, now I'm acting like him.

I was about to shout at him when a walking couple caught my eye. Forehead was walking towards us. She was smiling brightly and her enormous red bag, Cherry (she's crazy, naming her bag), was carried by non other than Sai. They were happily chatting that they didn't notice us.

"Shika-kun! Its Forehead!" I dragged him behind a counter and ducked behind it. I'm going to use my super spying skills to gather information!

"Ino, aren't you supposed to drag me _towards_ Sakura? Why the hell are we hiding here?" My bestfriend really looks happy. I've never seen her _this _happy, except of course when she's with her Imaginary boyfriend, Mr. Playboy. But after being with him, she usually turns into a big pile of "emoness" so that's not good. "People are looking at us Ino. I think they're suspecting that we're crazy." Sai bought her ice cream, he even got the correct flavor. He did his research. Hmmmnnn. "Ino, a security guard is heading our way. What are you doing? Put that umbrella down," she's laughing! She's enjoying herself! "I'm sorry ma'am, I'll get it for you. Ino, please give the kind lady her umbrella," somebody got my shield-a yellow umbrella- and I looked up. There was an old lady and a rather bulky looking man. He was looking at me suspiciously.

"What are you looking at huh?" I glared up at him. He was really tall and really big too. I think if I add two Chojis together he would still be bigger.

"I'm sorry sir, she's just a little hungry. Don't mind her. She goes crazy when she's hungry," stupid Forehead! Hey wasn't she supposed to be over at the ice cream stand? "Shika, didn't you remind your crazy girlfriend to take her anti-psychotic pills?" Anti-psychotic pills? Forhead you are going down!

"Shut up forhead!" The minx laughed! She laughed _her _laugh. I haven't heard _that _laugh for ages! Last time I heard her laughing like this was like 2 years ago! Back when we were still fifteen. Sasuke broke her! Dating Karin of all people! That jerk! I wanna strangle him!

Shika-kun and I got out of our hiding place and faced our friends. I crossed my arms on my chest, so much for my super spying skills. I glared at my grinning bestfriend.

"We're going to have movie night," Forehead raised a DVD case. "You guys want to join us?"

"We are going to watch A Walk to Remember," Sai's eyes crinkled when he smiled.

"How many times have you watched that movie Sai?" I have a feeling its more than 5.

Sai thought about it for a few seconds. "Twice," oh two times isn't that bad. "This week," huh? "We watched it three times last week and once the other week," I knew it. Trust Forehead to torture a guy with her favorite movie. Poor Sai, he must have fallen asleep while watching. Shika-kun can barely last ten minutes before snoozing when we watch it with Forehead.

"We also have food," he raised the bags that he was carrying. It looked really full for two people to be able to eat it all.

"Sai bought almost all the milk chocos in the shelf," she pointed at the plastic bag Sai was holding. "I think it's a month's worth of my heavenly treat!" She clapped her hands. She grinned and held his shoulder. Hmmmn. Forehead, being touchy? Sai looked down at her and smiled. She smiled back. "You're trying to make me fat, aren't you?"

"Not that I am guilty of your allegation but if ever you do by chance get fat, you will still be the same Sakura-hime that I know," OH MY GOSH! He's sooooo sweet! He even calls him princess! Why can't I have a boyfriend like him? I looked and Shika-kun, the ass was yawning! I oughta punch that yawn off his face! "You're added weight won't change whatever it is that I feel towards you," I looked at Forehead and saw that she was blushing to the roots of her pink hair. Take that Forehead! I told you he likes you!

**Change of POV**

I'm late! I'm late! Shit! Kakashi-sensei is going to kill me! Stupid Teme! If I'll fail algebra he is going to pay big!

I passed the shortest way to the faculty room to save more time. If I don't pass my project before 4PM sharp I'm going to kill that stupid Teme! I ran to a stop when I passed the grandstand. Is that Teme and Sakura-chan? But I left the bastard in our dorm room? Does he have magic powers? That jerk! He had magic powers and he didn't tell me! I'm going to kick his pale ass!

"Hey bastard!" He turned around and I was about to shout again when I noticed that he had a different hairstyle. The chicken ass is gone. "Sai," what is this weirdo doing with Sakura-chan? No wonder the Teme was extra grumpy today. Heh. He should really get over his denial and just admit it to himself that his over protectiveness of Sakura-chan means a lot more than mere friendship. Who the hell breaks his cellphone with his bare hands because of the "Sorry Sasucakes, I can't today. I have movie night with Sai this evening" text?

Sai was putting his pointer finger in front of his lips "Shhhhhh," is he telling me what to do? "Hime is asleep. Refrain from making noise," EH? Sakura-chan is asleep? "It would be a shame if your high pitched feminine voice would wake her up."

"Are you trying to tell me that I'm gay again?" I'm gonna kick his pale ass to Sand High and back!

"I did not insinuate that but if you insist, then I suppose that could be arranged," oh no he didin't!

"Oh no you didn't!"

"I believe I just did," he smiled that infuriating smile of his! I'm going kill him! I was about to when I remembered Sakura-chan. I glanced at her. She was lying on a small pillow-which I suppose she carries inside her "mob bag"-propped on Sai's lap. She was sleeping with a small smile on her face. I looked back at the pale-faced bastard and saw that he was drawing something. I peeked at his shoulder to see. He was drawing Sakura-chan. I sighed. I can't disturb her peace. I almost never see her this peaceful. What with Teme being an ass and all. It's all I can do after she rescued me from my Momma's wrath. I would have failed miserably without her.

"Oh shit! I'm gonna be late!" Kakashi-sensei is going to kill me! "I'll get you later for that bastard!" he nodded and smiled at me. Stupid Teme-lookalike!

I glanced at them one last time. Maybe having them together isn't such a bad idea after all. If he makes Sakura-chan happy then I guess there's nothing wrong with it. Teme will just have to suck it up cos I won't join his "we-can't-trust-that-good-for-nothing-bastard-artist" campaign. Even if stupid Sai calls me gay with his fancy words every chance he gets.

**Change of POV**

I looked at my boyfriend and he looked back at me. "No Neji, I won't do it," I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Tenten," he sighed, "it is going to be alright," he held my shoulders and pulled me near him. I stood my ground and didn't move. "Are you still afraid of my uncle? Did I not tell you that he was not referring to you that night?" I'm not scared of his uncle!

"I'm not scared of your uncle!" I huffed. I just get a little bit uncomfortable when he's around. He was looking at me when he said that thing about disrespectful brats. Hey! It's not my fault! How was I supposed to know that talking while having dinner was disrespectful? We talk all the time while eating at home!

"Then what seems to be the problem?" I think he's losing his cool. We've been arguing about this issue for more than thirty minutes now. "It is customary for our clan to celebrate the day of my uncle's birth with the entire family. You, as my girlfriend should be there," he massaged his forehead. "It would be disrespectful of you not to come."

I was about to answer him when we heard laughter and thuds of running feet. We looked to the right and saw Saku with Sai. They were jogging around the school oval. Saku was laughing and Sai was smiling. The two of them are always together these days.

The stopped when they spotted us. "Hi guys!" Saku waved and approached us. Her eyebrow shot up upon seeing my expression. "What did you do Nej?"She put her hands on her hips and glowered at Neji. It looks funny. It's like David facing Goliath. She barely reached his shoulders but still she tried to look menacing. Key word-tried.

"What gives you the idea that it is I who did something and not the other way around?" I let out an amused chuckle at his expression. It looked like he was having trouble deciding if he should find the situation funny or if he should be appalled at Saku's accusation.

"It's okay Saku," I held Neji's left arm. "I can take him head on," then winked at her.

"I know you can but if ever you need back up don't hesitate to call me," she smiled up at Neji. "Haven't seen you guys lately," she looked at me and huffed. "Where are you guys hiding?" Oh so now it's us who's hiding? She was the one always absent in our gatherings. I don't blame her. Sasuke throws "fits" when she's around with Sai. If there's someone to blame it would be Sasuke and his obliviousness.

I looked at her companion and smiled. Sai was looking at her like there was no one else there. The I-only-have-eyes-for-you look. It's nice seeing that it's not Saku giving that look and having somebody else direct it at her instead. I don't know if Saku notices this though.

I hope this goes well for Saku. She really looks happy with Sai but I have a bad feeling that she would still waver if Sasuke will give her even a little bit of attention.

"Where are you two going Sai?" I asked Sai. It took three seconds before he tore his eyes away from Saku. He looked at me and smiled.

"I am accompanying her for her afternoon jog," he caught a few strands of Saku's hair and played with it. "And I am helping her with her left kick."

"You play soccer?" It was Neji who stated the question I was going to ask.

"No but I am willing to learn," at that Saku smiled.

"He doesn't really do anything," she looked at Sai fondly and they shared a smile. "He's just there on the sidelines cheering me on."

"Hn," Neji looked at Sai contemplatively. "If you want I can give you pointers," I figured. Maybe he decided that Sai wasn't all that bad. He used to be so against him at first. What with Sasuke telling us that Sai was some sort of stalker. I don't know where he got that notion.

"That should be helpful," Saku laughed Sai's response and hit him playfully.

"You need all the help you can get Sai," she turned to me and Neji. "We have to go you guys. We have to finish early so we could laze around the field before I go home," they turned to leave. "See you guys around!" That and she waved before leaving.

"They actually look good together," I voiced out. I heard Neji hum his agreement.

"They do. But I think you have already noticed the similarities between Uchiha and Sai-san," he held my hand and I leaned onto him.

I sighed "Yeah I see it. Let's just hope that this ends well for the three of them," I looked up and saw that he was staring at a distance. "It's going to be okay Nej," I held his face. "Saku is a big girl now. She can take care of herself," he nodded and I smiled. Saku will always be our "little sister" no matter how old she gets. "And if she ends up hurt I will personally castrate those two ravens!" I added smiling evilly. He chuckled and kissed my forehead.

I tugged his hand and headed for the school exit. "Now take me shopping so I can find a suitable dress for your uncle's party," he released breathe of relief after I said it. He followed me without question and got in step with me.

**Change of POV**

Walking slowly I reached my destination. The grandstand was empty when I got there. Not surprising, it's past twilight after all. I was supposed to go to Karin's but I changed my mind. The stupid Dobe pissed me off. I haven't seen Sakz for days and my attempt to check on her was thwarted because she had movie night with that stupid freak of an artist. What did she see in that guy? He is clearly up to no good.

I turned to walk to the field when I noticed something. There was someone lying down on the middle of the field, a girl and a boy. Tch! Probably horny teens taking advantage of the low lighting of the location.

"Look! There it is! I told you we would find some! Now give me your hand!" That voice sounds familiar. "Quick before it disappears!" There was a low chuckle and I felt my knuckles turn to fists upon realizing who the pair was. "Great! Now it's gone! What are you laughing at?" My eyes narrowed and I was itching to go to them and drag Sakz away from that freak! I continued approaching them. They did not even notice me nearing, absorbed in whatever it is that they were doing.

"Nothing Hime," I can see the shadow of his hand reaching out to his companion. "Here, you can have my hand now," I heard Sakz huff and she pouted.

"I told you to wear pants with pockets!" She crossed her arms and glared at him. "How can your wish come true if you won't put your hand in your pocket?"

_**"Make a wish before it disappears," I took her hand and put it inside my pocket. I saw her smile and I smiled to myself. The world brightens when she smiles.**_

"What is it that you wish for Hime?" I felt the need to strangle him as more memories flashed to my mind.

**"**_**What's your wish?" I looked at her and saw that her eyes were curious. Her jade eyes were sparkling with mischief.**_

**"**_**To have the girl of my dreams," I didn't know why I chose that as my answer, I just felt it so right to say it.**_

It wasn't so confusing when we were fifteen. Now I feel a headache starting when I think about it.

"To have the boy of my dreams," was her dreamy reply. "Sai you made me say it! It won't come true!" The stupid jerk laughed and held her close. I am going to kill that bastard!

_"__**Crap! Now my wish won't come true!" I glared at her. She shouldn't have had me tell it. I removed our hands form my pocket and glared at her more. She looked at me with an amused expression.**_

"We can stay here all night if you like Hime. We will catch all of the stars that will fall so that you'll have your wish granted."

_**"You're not supposed to tell others your wish or it won't come true!" I looked at the sky willing it to produce more falling stars. "I guess we'll just have to catch as much stars as possible to reverse it," I held her hand again and waited for more of falling heavenly bodies.**_

She nodded and looked up. "How about you, what will your wish be?" she asked while looking at him. I was less than twenty feet from them.

"For your wish to come true," Sakz sighed and positioned herself firmly against him. What is she doing? She shouldn't be that close to him. She should not be close to him at all!

"Thank you Sai," she whispered. She tilted her face up and kissed his cheek. "Thank you," I wanted so much to rip them both to shreds. What are they doing? They shouldn't even be here! Sakz should be home by now! It's already dark and she's still here flirting with that jerk! Doesn't she have a sense of self-preservation? She even kissed him! Does she not know what teenage boys have inside their twisted minds?

"Sakz," if she does not acknowledge my presence and refuses to leave I swear I'll do something that she would not want to see.

Both of them looked up and jade eyes caught mine. It went from confusion to shock. "Sasucakes," she breathed. She held on to the bastard's arm tighter and she looked like she was alarmed. The boy with her did nothing but placing a calm hand to her lower back.

"It's okay Hime," he said soothingly. "It is just your _friend_. He won't do us any harm," not if I can help it. Get your hands away from her you freak!

"Are you mad Sasucakes?" She was tearing up. "I'm sorry if I did something that upset you," she added quietly. I forgot how she almost always cries when I get seriously pissed.

"You should get home," she looked at Sai and I was inclined to pull her up forcefully if needed.

"It is okay Uchiha-san," I was not talking to you, you jerk. "I will take your _friend_ home," he looked at me knowingly. "I already asked permission from her parental units and her siblings," and they allowed it? I thought they were supposed to be protective. "Your _friend_ is safe with me," he put much force in saying the word "friend", what the hell is his problem?

"You should get home early," I disregarded whatever it was that the freak said and directed my words at Sakz. "You have an early class tomorrow," she shifted and looked at Sai with a pleading look.

The jerk sat up and extended his arm. He pulled Sakz up and he got the mat and basket they had with them. He put his free arm on her shoulder and smiled down at her. "What do you say we continue this in your backyard? Then we eat icecream and chocolates while viewing a movie?"

Sakz smiled weakly at him and held onto his hand on her shoulder, seemingly needing support. "That would be wonderful Sai," is she okay? I told her not to associate herself with that jerk! Look how it affects her! She looks pale and she looks like she can barely stand without swaying.

"Anything for you Hime," he looked at me and cocked his head. "We should be off Uchiha-san. It was nice seeing you," I'm sure it was, freak.

Sakz was looking at the ground "Bye Sasucakes. See you around," her voice was so low it was barely audible.

They walked away and I felt heat traveling from my nape to my back. I need to let off some steam. I took my new phone and dialed. I bought a new one after I _accidentally _broke the other one. It took only two rings before the other line was answered.

"Sasu?"

"Karin. Where are you?"

"At home, why?"

"I'm coming over."

I ended the call and went on my way.

When I got out of Karin's room I was more relaxed. Thoughts of a certain pinkette and a certain freak doing what I just did with the redhead got me peeved again though. I have to figure out a way to get rid of this feeling.

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my longest chapter so far. (^_^)

What do you guys think about it? I had a hard time switching from one POV to another. Did it come out okay?

review please!


	9. comparing ravens

Yo! Chapter 9 here!

This chapter is a continuation of chapter 5. I hope you guys aren't confused with the way the chapters were written.

woodbyne: you're right about Sai knowing how Sasu feels. Sasu's just being obliviously oblivious..hehe. Yep, he's pretty sexist alright! And he's extremely possessive too! You can see in this chapter what else his jealousy made him do. (^_^)

Thank you for liking the other POV's of the previous chapter. I personally thought it didn't work out, but since you liked it, I guess it did! yey!

I'm not really sure if this chapter fills your angst fix. I hope it does though. And good luck with that Othello essay! I know you'll do well in it!

EndlessFlame911: I love jealous Sasu too! hehe. I really can't help but compare Naru's voice to that of a girl. I seldom watch the English version cos I like the Japanese version better. I think the voice actor is Maile Flanagan. Correct me if I'm wrong. (^_^)

I like how you put your observations in your review. It really made me smile.

Hope you _do_ post your gaasaku. I'll be waiting for it. (^_^)

illneverknow: wow! You called my writing FABULOUS! Really! Thank you so much! And yeah Sasu is a jerk! If I was Saku I would have kicked him senseless a long time ago. (^_^)

Kate Uchiha: thank you for finding time to review. Sorry for the confusion. I'm still not that good in organizing my thoughts. (^_^) if you still get confused feel free to tell me, I would gladly clear it our for you.

A big thank you to those who put this story to their fave's list and put it on alert- BadassAlec, crazymel2008, Kate Uchiha, Marie Blubert, woodbyne, EndlessFlame911, ilneverknow, miko the neko, Natascha-chan, TheCynic'sDream, and WhiteRose95.

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Enjoy!

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_Italics: flashback_

Naruto isn't mine.

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**Chapter 9: comparing ravens**

_When I managed to pass the Quad someone called my name. I stopped and caught my breath putting my hands on my knees taking deep breaths. I heard footsteps coming closer and saw a pair of sneakers thrust onto me. I looked up and saw Sai. He smiled his smile, a smile that didn't reach his eyes._

"_Saw the whole Chemlab fiasco. I still had the keys to your locker. I figured you'd need this," he explained gesturing to my worn out running shoes. _

"_Sai," I whispered, smiling sadly. "I missed you."_

He still looked the same. Gorgeous eyes-so much like _his _eyes, ink black hair-so much like _his_ hair, pale skin-so much like _his _skin. But the difference lies in the feelings. Sai _is _inlove with me, whereas _he_ is not. Sai is so much better than _him. _Why can't I just love Sai? He's nice, caring and he doesn't treat me like crap. He values my opinions and listens to me. He puts my needs first and I'm sure that I would be the only girl in his life. He puts up with all my weirdness and even likes me for it. And most of all, he respects me. He's the epitome of my dream boy and what did I do? I let him slip from my fingers. Not only that, I ended up hurting him.

"_Hime? Are you ready?" it was our first anniversary as a couple and we are going to celebrate it having dinner together._

"_Coming Sai!" I did one last look at myself in the mirror before I hurried out of my room. _

_Sai was talking with Sasori-nii. My boyfriend was drawing faces on the puppets that my big brother made. They both looked up when they heard me come down. Sai smiled and I couldn't help but smile back. He's really gorgeous. I don't know what he saw in me but who am I to complain? If only his hair is a little bit different and his voice would drop a little bit lower and his eyes just a little bit deeper and his-wait, what am I doing? I'm doing it again. I have to stop comparing Sai with Sasucakes. I know my relationship with Sasucakes would remain as it is. I am his friend and I will remain as one forever, even if it kills me to see him with somebody else. He has the tendency to get attracted to girls that are close to me or if not those who I get along with pretty well too. So I usually get stuck with him and his date a lot. It's not healthy for my eyes and throat. So these days I try my best to keep myself from him as much as possible. Good thing I have Sai. _

"_What time will you be back?" Sasori-nii's question woke me up from my musings._

"_Before ten PM sharp," Sai answered. He stood up and approached me._

_Just then my cellphone rang. I looked at it and saw that it as Sasucakes. I answered it after two rings._

"_What's wrong? Are you okay?" he only ever calls me when he needs something or when he's in trouble. I couldn't help but get nervous every time he calls._

"_Sakz?" his voice was weak and a little raspy. Is he crying?_

"_Are you okay?" I saw Sasori-nii and Sai look at me. I smiled weakly at them and turned around and went to the terrace. "Sasucakes?" I urged when he still didn't talk. I could hear him breathing from the other line. What the hell is wrong with him? "Where are you? I'm coming over," I heard an indignant "What?" from Sasori-nii and a tired sigh from Sai. _

_I turned to face them "I have to go to the Uchiha mansion," Sai smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. Sasori-nii looked really disappointed. "You know he's suicidal! I can't just-"_

"_Princess, it's your anniversary," Sasori-nii cut me off. His tone was very disappointed too. "Aren't you supposed to be spending time with Sai?" I looked at Sai and saw that he was looking elsewhere. "That Uchiha brat can take care of himself, he's seventeen years old!"_

"_But aniki-" I stopped because of Sai's hand that went to my shoulder._

"_It's alright Sasori-san," he smiled his smile again and his eyes were sad. I felt the guilt consume me. I am such a horrible person! How can I do this to him? "It would not be wise to have dinner when Hime's mind would be elsewhere," he looked down at me. "I'll take you to the mansion," with that he took his car keys and walked towards the door. "I'll wait for you in the car. It was nice talking with you Sasori-san."_

_Before I could follow him, Sasori-nii stopped me._

"_Princess, what are you doing?" I looked back at my brother at his words. "Do you really want to do this?" he held my shoulder gently. "I wouldn't be surprised if you two will eventually break up. This is the nth time that you're going to ditch Sai for that good for nothing Uchiha brat."_

"_But aniki he needs Me." why couldn't they understand that I'm the only one Sasucakes talks to with his problems. If I leave him alone I don't know what he'll do to himself! "I couldn't forgive myself if he does something bad just because there wasn't anyone to listen to him."_

"_Are you sure that's all there is to it?" He's at it again. I hate it when he reads my face like an open book._

"_Aniki please," he sighed and let me go._

"_I don't like seeing you like this Princess. Please do understand that," he crossed his arms and looked outside. "He's not healthy for you," I heard that line before. I think it was Ino or Naru or was it Tennie? "If he won't get out of that river he's in he would never be welcome in this house," He added._

"_River? What river aniki? What are you talking about?"_

"_Nothing princess," he smiled at me. "Now get going, Sai-kun is waiting long enough as it is and you know how I feel about tardiness."_

The pain on my throat intensified. I can't believe I did that to him. I'm such a bad person.

"I missed you more Hime," he helped me stand up and guided me towards the benches around the Quad.

He's acting as if I didn't break him. I think I did more than that though. I broke him and stepped on the little pieces. Just like what Sasucakes does to me. He broke my heart a million times but still I continue loving him with the little pieces left. I feel miserable. I know how it feels like to give your heart to someone who doesn't want it. That's why I try to be extra nice to Sai. I don't want him to feel the way I do each time Sasucakes disregards my feelings and throws it in my face. It may be unintentional but damn it hurts badly! It cuts deep, so deep that each time I think about it, I find it hard to breathe.

When we sat down neither of us said anything. It was a long time since we last saw each other and _that_ last time didn't go really well. I was still catching my breath and I still had the feeling of my stomach flipping over. I need to puke. And puke I did.

Sai rubbed my back and pulled my hair up. I continued puking my guts out for a few minutes. When I was done he gave me his hanky.

"Take it. I know you have the tendency to forget where you put your handkerchief," I smiled and accepted the offer.

"You still remember that?" my throat hurt so badly. It's like there was something really sharp lodged in my windpipe. I really couldn't hold back the tears anymore. Unwanted images of Sasaucakes together with Tayuya and Ami being intimate in his bed plagued my mind. I slept on that bed! I will never ever go in his room again. If we have sleepovers I'm sleeping in his kitchen counter! He doesn't do that dirty stuff there, does he?

Seeing Sai's unsmiling eyes added to the weight of my melancholy too. I know he knows why I'm crying. And I know that he's hurt because I'm hurt. I feel this every time Sasucakes is hurt too. The pain is magnified tenfold and there is nothing you can do but feel it. Hurt yourself silently, hurt until you become numb from the pain. Its hurts more because you know deep within that it won't be you who will ease the pain but somebody else.

Stupid heart! Why did you fall in love with that bastard! He doesn't give you anything but pain! Why can't you just fall in love with Sai? If I fall in love with Sai then it would all be settled. I'll be okay, Sai will be okay and Sasucakes can bed all the girls he wants and no one will get hurt!

"SAAAAAIII!" I wailed. He hugged me and I cried.

"Let it out Hime," he coaxed me. I cried harder. "Let it all out until it hurts no more," he rubbed soothing circles in my back. It made me somewhat relieved. But the nagging pain is still there.

I sobbed for what it felt like forever before he let me go. I really did miss him. He understands me. He lets me cry my eyes out unlike my other friends. If I cry in front of them it would be a huge mess. That's why I schedule my sob fest to a minimum.

I took in a deep breath after crying. He looked amused when he glanced at me.

"What's so funny?" I must look like crap. I think he's laughing at my appearance.

"It's nothing Hime," he put his arm around my shoulder and held me close. "You still have not changed after all this time," he stared at a distance and sighed. "He's still your bestfriend I take it?" I didn't need to ask him what he meant.

"Ahuh," I sighed and leaned on his shoulder. "Do I look like crap?" I really think I do.

He looked down at me at smiled. "You're still breathtaking Hime," I snorted at his response. I've seen myself in the mirror post-sob fest. I look like pink-haired monster.

"Shut it Sai. I know I look awful!"

"You will always be beautiful in my eyes."

"How could you say that?" I need to cry again! Why can't I just love the person who appreciates me? I feel so weak! "Sai, I really, really, really want to tell you I love you," I'm tearing up again. Arrrggh! I'm so pathetic!

"And I would not have wanted anything more Hime," he looked so understanding. Why can't I fall in love with him?

Tears were already running down my cheeks. "I love you Sai," his eyes softened but they were still sad.

"WHAT THE HELL?" I took a sharp intake of breath when I heard _him._ Oh my God why is he here? He'll see me cry and then figure out that what he did with Ami and Tayuya hurt me! I'm so dead!

**Change of POV**

"Sakz," are you okay? I had wanted to add. It was obvious that she wasn't, so saying so would be plain stupid. She didn't answer nor did she look at me. I hate it when I talk and she wouldn't pay attention. "Sakz, look at me when I'm talking to you," she looks weak and unstable. I was about to check her temperature with my hand when Ami beat me to it.

"Are you okay Sakura? You look a bit green?" she looked at the ground and inhaled deeply. It's as if she found it difficult to breathe. What's wrong with her?

"Excuse me; I think I need a trip to the ladies' room," she then proceeded to walk like there was no tomorrow. It looked like she was being chased by some criminal. I was about to shrug it off as one of her weird quirks but I realized that the ladies' room was located at the opposite direction of where she was headed.

There must have been some emergency. But if there was, she would have at least told me. She would tell me right? She may have distanced herself from me since the stupid artist broke her heart but she would tell me if there's something important that happened.

That stupid jerk! If not for him Sakz wouldn't have avoided me so much. The other girls told me I look like him. I gathered that she remembers that freak every time she sees me. That is why she tries her hardest not to be near me when no one else is around. She acts all weird around me sometimes too. Like she's hurt and it's my fault that she's feeling that way. It's not my fault! I only look like him but I wouldn't hurt her! I would hurt everyone _but_ her.

Fucking jerk! Who gave him the right to hurt Sakz? He's nothing but a good for nothing scumbag! If only the others believed me. I already told them that he would end up hurting the pinkette but no, they had to "give him a chance". Tch! Stupid morons!

"Excuse me girls, but I need to be somewhere else," the two girls looked at me, confused. Tch! Stupid bimbos. "I'll call you," like I would. It was fun that night but I still felt empty the next morning. There's no use having them around anymore. If Sakz had chosen one of them then I would have made it last at least a week. I trust her judgment. Since she chose neither, well it isn't that bad. I can always look for another one that would hold my attention. I have a weak spot for jade eyes these days.

I walked to the direction where Sakz went. I have to check on her. I have the feeling that something was bothering her. Where could she have gone? I'll look first in the grandstand. She likes to laze around there. I passed by the Quad and saw something pink. I came back and saw that she wasn't alone. Beside her was the stupid artist. He was holding her and she was crying. It looks like she cried hard because her eyes were really puffy and her nose had a red tinge on it.

"I love you Sai," shit! Is she trying to get him back? After every thing he had done? Is she really that in love with that jerk? I felt something tug at my chest.

"_Let it go Teme. She looks happy with him!" happy my ass!_

"_Oh come on Sasuke! Leave Forehead and Sai alone! They love each other!_" _love? How can she love that freak?_

"_Uchiha, I have never seen Sakura this happy. Do not ruin it just because of your trust issues," trust issues? Have you seen the way that jerks looks at her? He is clearly up to no good!_

"_Get out of that river soon foolish little brother. De Nile is a dangerous place to be. Look at what it did to you. Your pinkette is being happy with someone else and here you are sulking because you can't be with her," she's not MY pinkette! And I am not sulking! I am simply finding ways to stop that scumbag from defiling my friend!_

"_Don't you dare disrupt my little sister's happiness Uchiha. If you do so, be prepared for the consequences. I am tired of hearing her cry over a certain bastard's stupidity. It's time that she has her share of happiness that she does not get from you," What are you talking about? Who is this bastard so I can help you kick his ass? And I make her smile, don't I? I make her laugh too! What is wrong with you people? _

All of them did not believe me! When Sakz got the news that the stupid freak got hot and heavy with a college chick what did they do? They looked at me as if I was to blame? I did not force him to do what he did! I just introduced them to each other and the freak took it further! I had to make sure that he would not cheat on her! And I was right! He did cheat on her!

"_Sasucakes?" her voice sounded so weak in my ears. "Is it true that you got Sai drunk before that" she gulped; "event happened?" she looked so fragile that I wanted to hold her. "Naru told me," she sighed. "I won't be mad if you tell me." _

"_Drunk or not he should not have done that! You deserve someone better so quit crying over him!" when I see that jerk again I am going to strangle him! How dare he hurt Sakz?_

_She smiled ruefully "Do you even know why I'm crying or who I'm crying for?" I nodded. Of course I knew! She shook her head. "I may deserve someone better but for me he's better than the best," she started crying. I hate seeing her cry. It feels like my world darkens and I find it hard to suck in oxygen, like I'm drowning and can't swim back to the surface. "It just sucks that he doesn't get it though," she wiped her tears and started to walk away. "Bye Sasuke." _

_Sasuke. Not Sasucakes. She really must be out of it. I promise not to let anyone else hurt her. She avoided me for months after that. She only goes to school but she was like a zombie, alive but without her soul. It took numerous death threats from Ino and a crying Hinata to convince her to hang out with us again. But she keeps away from me as much as possible._

Their break-up got her bad. She refused to eat and she stayed silent for long periods of time. She seldom smiles and when she does it was always clouded with something I could not comprehend. She does not smile at me like before. Before, her smile brightens my day. Now, when she smiles at me, she looks like she's carrying a heavy burden. That jerk broke her and what does she do? She tries to get him back! Does she really love him that freaking much? I felt another tug at my chest again.

"WHAT THE HELL?"is she stupid? I will kick this bastard's ass till Sand High and back!

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What do you guys think? Should I make them fight? (^_^)

Review pls!


	10. coping stupid things I do take 3

Yo! I had a little trouble with this chapter. I wanted so much to have a fight scene but I just couldn't write it! I kept repeating it over and over and no matter what I did it still didn't come out right!

This chapter also has flashbacks; I hope you guys don't get confused. (^_^)

woodbyne: Goosebumps? The good kind or the bad kind? Hehe. I'm thankful that you were happy for the events in the previous chapter-except for the cliffie. Lol. Don't worry, Sasu will eventually realize his obliviousness in future chapters. I couldn't forgive myself if I leave him as clueless as he is now. I had this chappie in Saku's POV but I'm planning on having chapter 11 in Sasu's or maybe somebody else's, Itachi maybe. I'm having a hard time figuring out how to give Sai a "reward" for being really good to Saku. I'm beginning to have a soft spot for him already. And you were right, I can't have the "I love you Sai" situation to end in just one chapter, there's still so much left to write about it in the next chapter. (^_^)

xiamesee: thank you so much for liking the story and taking time to review! I hope you'll enjoy this chapter and the upcoming ones in the future. (^_^)

EndlessFlame911: Know what? I'm beginning to hate Sasu too! I feel stupid for being affected with my own writing. Hehe. I really wanted to make Sai kick Sasu's annoying ass but I couldn't for the life of me write fight scenes. *sigh* Guess I'll just go for an "almost fight". I'll try again in the next chapter. If I think that the fight scene I would write would not cause my readers' eyes to bleed while reading, you guys will witness said ass kicking.

Go you! Go! Go! Go! Pretty excited for you story! (^_^)

illneverknow: whew! I still can't get over the "fabulous" thingie. You're making me smile a big stupid smile. Thank you! \(^_^)/

You're right, that would be quite interesting. I myself would like to see that happen but since I lack the necessary talent to write fight scenes, I'll just leave that to our imaginations ne?

BadassAlec: He's an idiot alright. Makes me wanna bonk him upside the head. -.-

Thanks for the review and hope you'll still stick around in the future chaps!

Thank you so much for the amazing review you guys! That was the most reviews I had in one chapter! I was ecstatic when I read all of them! Thank you! You made my day!

Also a big thank you to those who recently added my story to their alerts/favorites list: xiamesee, cherry tomates sakuraxsasuke, cleareyes25, and Midnighter67.

Enjoy!

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_Italics: flashback_

Normal: present

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Naruto isn't mine.

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**Chapter 10: coping-stupid things I do take 3**

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_Tears were already running down my cheeks. "I love you Sai," his eyes softened but they were still sad._

_"WHAT THE HELL?" I took a sharp intake of breath when I heard __him.__ Oh my God why is he here? He'll see me cry and then figure out that what he did with Ami and Tayuya hurt me! I'm so dead!_

"GET AWAY FROM HER!" Oh my God! Is he shouting? I've never heard him shout.

"Sasucakes?" I rasped weakly. He looks seriously pissed. I can see tinges of red in his pupils. What do I do? I'm too tired for this.

I felt Sai stand but he left his hand on my shoulder. I'm extremely thankful for his action. Without it, I would surely sway and might fall off the bench. My recent sprinting spree left me breathless and weak; no to mention my sob fest. My feet were killing me and I feel like there are a thousand drums sounding in my head. All these pale in comparison to the ache I feel in my chest as I remembered something that happened a few years back.

"_Do you think Karin would like this?" He was holding a big fluffy pillow. I'm the one who adored pillows, not Karin! I looked at him and gave weak smile. He rephrased his question. "If you were to receive this as a gift, would you like it?" he let me hold the pink fluffy thing._

_I hugged it "I'd love it Sasucakes," he nodded and got it again. I sighed for the millionth time that day. Shopping was supposed to be fun. But shopping for somebody else was another matter, especially if you're shopping for your love's girlfriend. A girlfriend that isn't being all too loyal to said love. I would have endured shopping for the Pig but this is too much!_

"_Then it's settled, I'm going to buy this," he went over to the counter and paid for it._

_I sat down in one of the benches situated at the mall entrance. I had with me the "gifts" Sasucakes bought. All of the items were MY favorite things, pillows, books, trinkets, my favorite perfume, candles and unique night lights. It sucks that it's not for me though. I have a feeling Karin will give me some of it later. I couldn't help but smile. After I receive the gifts I'll end up imagining that they were for me. That Sasucakes bought them specifically for my pleasure. I'm so pathetic._

_Why couldn't he put it in his mind that Karin and I are different? If he sees us as similar, why can't he love me instead? I would never cheat on him like Karin does. I would never dream of leaving his side when everyone else leaves him. I would always be there for him even if he doesn't want me to be there. I would always be there to listen to him. I'd give him everything I could afford to give. _

_Why can't he see that? I've always been the one to understand him. Well, me and Naru but Naru's case is different. Doesn't he see that I'm the first one he goes to when he has problems? I don't understand how he could reveal so much of himself to me but he couldn't afford to love me back. Isn't love supposed to be a deep connection between two people? I don't see him going all emotional to other people!_

"Get your hands off her you freak," his tone was calm, too calm. I looked up. His image looked hazy through my tears. Through the haze I could still see his piercing eyes. Is he angry that I ran away from him? That I didn't get to choose his flavor of the week before I decided that I couldn't take it anymore and walked away? Why did he have to let me choose between the two people I considered as somewhat friends aside from our usual peers? Is he doing this on purpose? Does he get kicks out of hurting me?

"I said get your hands off her," he was advancing towards us. Sai still stood his ground. "Or I'll-"

"I'M SORRY!" I shouted through my tears. My voice sounded weak even in my own ears. Sasucakes stopped and looked my way. "I'm sorry for whatever it is that he did. I'm sorry for whatever it is that I did."

"_I am going to kill you Dobe!" Naru was trembling. He broke Sasucakes favorite toy-a toy given to him by his beloved Aniki._

"_I'M SORRY!" both of them were startled when they heard me. It was clear that Naru doesn't plan on apologizing basing on the expression he wore. My seven year old mind could not conjure any more solutions than that. "I'm sorry for whatever it is that he did!" our raven haired playmate's look softened. "Blame it on me." I added. _

"_It's okay," he calmed down. "It was an old toy anyway," Naru huffed._

"_Heh Teme! Why do you go soft for Sakura-chan and Sakura-chan alone? If she wasn't here you would have kicked my ass! Not that you can coz I'm a ninja! And a pretty boy like you can't beat ninjas!"_

"_Shut up usuratonkachi!"_

"Blame it on me," I whispered knowing already that my apology alone wouldn't calm him. Who am I to him? I'm just nothing but worthless dirt only good enough to choose his latest bedmate, but never good enough to be loved by him. I'm not like _his_ girls, I don't have the guts to do "stuff" that his "experienced" girls do. I would never fit into his world now. It's like were drifting apart, like I'm a different species from his "usual". Day by day I feel alienated from him. Like he's drifting away and I can't do anything to get him back. He's with me but he isn't. So near yet so far. And it hurts me; it hurts me to see him so far away.

"What the hell are you apologizing for?" He's really mad at me. My head is killing me! My chest hurts and it's taking almost all my energy to breath properly. I wanted so much to tell Sasucakes to get away from me so I can breathe! He looked murderously at me.

I looked down and cried harder. Why can't we go back in time? I want to be seven and carefree again. The only problem I had then was if my mom would allow me to have sleepovers at the Uchiha mansion. Why is it so freaking hard to breath! I hurt everywhere! Love isn't supposed to hurt! It's supposed to make people happy. Why am I not happy? Love sucks! It sucks bad!

"_Let's go Sakz," I stood up. He took most of the shopping bags from me. It was getting harder for me to breath so I took off my jacket. He was supposed to surprise Karin for her birthday and figured out for himself that I would enjoy it if I assisted him in the act. Enjoy it my ass! I'd probably end up biking around our neighborhood again later!_

_It was a school night but I conjured up an excuse to stay out late. Stupid Sasucakes wants to give his gifts to the redhead on June 20__th__, exactly 12AM sharp. His anal personality made him bring an alarm clock and brought it with us to the door of Karin's house. _

_TICK TOCK…TICK TOCK…_

"_Do you think she'll like it?" why do like hurting me Sasucakes? I hate you._

"_..." I looked everywhere but him. She won't like it. She doesn't appreciate things given to her. I told you not to bother with the gifts! _

_TICK TOCK…TICK TOCK… _

"_If we end up getting married you'll be there right?" he looked up while tapping his fingers to his knee. "You'll be the maid of honor I suppose, since Karin's your friend." I'll be sick on your wedding day! I won't be able to come for I'll be in the hospital!_

"_You won't get sick," oh shit I said that out loud? "You promised me that you will always be there if ever I needed you," he looked at me. "And I need you to be there in my wedding," he poked my forehead gently. I don't think I can take it if I had to attend his wedding. I'll die with oxygen deprivation by the time they say 'I do'._

"_Besides, you're as healthy as a bull and you never get sick," I'm getting sick now! How could you talk about wedding plans with me! I hate you!_

_TICK TOCK…TICK TOCK…_

"What the hell did you do to her?" I saw that he had a death grip on Sai's collar. What is he doing?

"I did not do anything," Sai's reply made me look at him. He was answering through gritted teeth. Shit! Both of them are angry now. I don't want a fight to start! They're both black belters and I know they won't stop until one of them gives up or is unconscious. I don't want any of them unconscious!

"_I need all the special people in my life to be present in my wedding," I would no doubt be there if I would be your bride._

_TCIK TOCK…TICK TOCK…_

"_You're going to marry Karin?" but she's cheating on you! "Are you totally sure about that?" throat ache alert! If this does not stop in less than five minutes max, Haruno Sakura will turn into a big pile of patheticness! Is that even a word? Arrgghh! _

_He looked at me and nodded. "Aside from you, she's the only female I can stand to be around with," his forehead creased and he raised an eyebrow. "Unless of course if you disagree," he looked amused "I would not want my wife and my Sakz to hate each other," he slowly shook his head. "Wouldn't want my girls to fight," MY Sakz? Does that mean you own me or something? "Karin's your friend right?" he looked down at me and I nodded._

"_Yeah but aren't you a bit too young to be talking about marriage?" and aren't you a bit too stupid to be talking to ME about this? Don't you get it? I love you, you stupid jerk!_

_TICK TOCK…TICK TOCK…_

_I've always loved you! Ever since you saved me from those bullies when we were four! Why did you have to grow up! When I told you to think of girls as GIRLFRIENDS and not as GIRLS who are your FRIENDS, I did not mean Karin you moron! You are so clueless! I meant ME you dumbass! And you call Naru a dobe!_

"_Age doesn't matter."_

_TICK TOCK…TICK TOCK…_

_I'm beginning to hate that sound. I reached for the annoying alarm clock._

"_What are you doing?" he positioned the object out of my reach._

"_I'm turning it off! The sound is driving me nuts!" he looked at me like I grew two heads and smirked._

"_Have you gone insane?"_

_TICK TOCK…TICK TOCK…_

_I pulled my hair in annoyance! "Turn that damn thing off Sasucakes or I'll kick your sorry ass to Wind country and back!" _

_We ended up in a mini wrestling match, each trying hard to get a hold of the blasted clock._

_RIIIIIIIIING! _

_We stopped and stared at each other. The time read 11:59pm, only a minute more until his beloved's birthday._

"_Alright let's get this over with so I can go home! I have classes tomorrow," I sure hope Karin won't get pissed. She hates it when somebody disturbs her "beauty rest". _

_Why does he have to do this? I told him a billion times in different ways that the redhead was cheating on him. I never said it directly to the point but he's a genius right? He should get it. Even Naru and Kiba get it, so why can't he? He just shrugs it off. I think he's way too blinded by their bedroom activities to actually confront her about it._

_He opened the door using his spare key. Karin lives alone in their house because her rich parents are away all the time. Sasucakes got in first. He didn't say a word but I felt him stiffen. I was holding the pink fluffy pillow so I did not see what got him so quiet. The pillow was almost as big as me for crying out loud! The only sound I could hear was the stupid ticking of the stupid clock. I bumped into his back and I almost fell. I was about to shout at him when I heard somebody moan. _

"_Suigetsu!" oh shit! It's Karin! _

_The pillow I was holding dropped at the same time with my jaw. The redhead was half naked on her couch, riding Suigetsu-the basketball team captain from Sound High. She already told me lots of stories about her "Sharkboy"! I looked beside me and saw Sasucakes fuming. I looked back at the two. They didn't even notice us! Karin what have you done? Sasucakes is gonna kill both of you!_

"_Let's go!" he pulled my arm and led me outside. He didn't bother closing Karin's door. He pushed me to his car and threw the gifts at the foot of my chair. I was so surprised that he didn't do anything about the event he just witnessed. If I were to catch my boyfriend with somebody else I don't know what I'll do. Well I have a pretty good idea of the violent things I'll do, but storming out and leaving without doing anything wouldn't be one of them. _

_He drove like a madman while tears were running down his cheeks. He was so quiet. I myself couldn't talk. The last time I saw him cry was when he thought I was drowning and that was eons ago. I wanted to hug him, tell him that it would be alright and that there are other girls in the world. Karin may be my friend but she isn't worth a single teardrop from his eyes. If he would only love me, I wouldn't make him cry. I'll do my best to make him happy, even if he ends up hurting me. Having him would be worth all the pain._

_It fucking hurts seeing him cry. It hurts a million times worse because the person he is crying for isn't worth shit! Can't he see that she's just playing with him? He always tells me that the redhead and I were so similar. Am I really that unlovable? Why can he love Karin and not me? I do everything he asks me to, to the point wherein I hurt myself. I almost always end up in emotional distress when I'm with him. He'd make me feel so worthless at times, that I'm not worth loving. There was a time when I thought about dyeing my hair red and using red contacts so I'd look more like Karin, I thought that maybe if I do that he'd see me as a girl and not as his nerdy friend. I hurt every time I see the things she makes him do. I hurt every time I hear from him how much he wants her near, how he loves her, how she's special and all that. Karin is strong and independent, experienced and hot, alluring and sexy. Always HER never ME, always KARIN and never SAKURA. _

_Trees beside the road were a blur in my eyes. He was crying and I was crying with him. The only sound that could be heard in the car is the screeching of the tires and the ticking of the clock. He was driving too fast and I honestly thought that we would end up in a car crash. As I began praying for our safety he stopped the car._

_TICK TOCK…TICK TOCK…_

"_Why are you crying?" his voice was controlled. "I do not need your pity Sakura," Sakura? _

_I gulped. He called me Sakura, not Sakz. I have a bad feeling about this. "I don't pity you Sasu-"_

"_Shut the fuck up!" his voice was too low to be considered normal. I started crying again but this time my tears were of anger. What is he mad at me for? Didn't he know that I had to resort to crying in front of Sasori-nii so that I could help him surprise his cheating girlfriend! _

"_Don't you dare displace your anger on me Sasuke! I have told you a million times that she was cheating on you but you just turned your back at me!" I shouted. Why are you doing this to me? I have never wanted anything bad happen to you. I don't want anything to hurt you. Can't you see that? "It is not my fault that you were blinded by your lust for her! It's not my fault that you go gaga when she comes over!" you even forget everything when you're with her! You forget all about me too. You let me walk in the rain all alone you stupid bastard! _

_I wanna breathe! I feel like the car is suffocating me. No, it's not the car; it's him that's doing it. He's killing me and he doesn't even know it. _

"_I did not give you the right to criticize what I do. If you have nothing good to say then shut the fuck up," he seethed. _

_TICK TOCK…TICK TOCK…_

_I looked at him. He stopped crying but his knuckles were turning white in the steering wheel. He wants me to shut up? Fine! I won't talk!_

_He started the car again and drove like the devil himself was chasing him. I prayed really hard for us not to get killed. When we arrived on my street, I was relieved. It was past one in the morning and almost all the lights in our house were off. He stopped in front of my house and opened the car lock. I got out without saying anything. I jumped when I heard something drop after I got off. I looked down and saw the gifts. _

"_You can have all of those," and he sped away. I stared at the things he left. The stupid clock was still ticking._

"_I hate you, you stupid clock!" I kicked it as hard as I could. I didn't notice tears running in my cheeks. I guess I was right; the gifts did end up mine. But I was just a second choice; I'm always the second choice when it comes to things like this. Had Karin chosen a different night to screw Sharkboy then tonight would have ended differently. I thought about it for a while. The last time I helped in surprising the redhead, I got drenched in rainwater. Success or failure, either way, I'd end up hurt. Anything that has to do with Karin and Sasucakes hurts me. And I hate myself for it. _

_After that, Sasucakes changed. He dated everyone he could and bedded every girl that would let him. He got himself new motto "the more, the merrier" which is total crap! But I just kept my mouth shut most of the time. I have no right to question his way of coping when I can barely cope with my own heartbreak._

_He still dated Karin. Both of them know that they were cheating on each other but it was fine. They preferred it that way. I wanted so much to hate Karin for what she did but I didn't want to ruin our friendship. I seldom see her anyway coz she goes to a different school so I keep my hate level to a minimum._

That was the last time I saw Sasucakes literally turn red in anger. This time, he looks even angrier.

"The hell you didn't!" I almost didn't see his punch aiming for Sai's face. It didn't make contact though. Sai caught his first in his hand. They were glaring daggers at each other. Ooh shit I have got to stop them! "Then who made her cry bastard? Who did this to her?" I didn't notice that there was already a crowd growing around us. In the back of my mind I heard familiar voices but I couldn't care less.

"OH MY GOD! SASUKE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Let go of Sai please!" My plea wasn't heard of course. I could feel the testosterone level of the place heighten up. "Sai please!" I saw that Sai somehow eased up.

"I did not do this to her Uchiha-san," I felt a cold chill run through my spine at his next words. "You did."

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Well how was it? Hope you liked it!

Whose POV would you like next chapter? I want to try Itachi's or maybe one of Saku's bros or maybe Sasu. What do you guys think?


	11. obliviously oblivious

Heya guys! I just got to post this today! I'm dying for your feedbacks and I hope you won't kill me by the end of this chapter. Peace! \(^_^)/

I was sooooo happy receiving my most number of reviews last chapter that I couldn't help but write more. You guys are great! Thank you so much!

illneverknow: sorry for the cliffie. =) you made me smile with your review again! You've been here since chapter one and I love you for it! I give you lots of hugs! Thank you so much!

EndlessFlame911: thank you for the advice on the fight scene! I used it here. I hope it's effective. Hehe. I'm planning on making somebody else kick Sasu's ass in the next chapter. =) hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Kate Uchiha: its okay, you're allowed to get mad at Sasu. I myself got mad at him too! ;)

I'm flattered that you love the story so far. It's nice that others appreciate my story. You're observations on its uniqueness really made my day! Thank you!

random: I don't know if you'll be able to read this but if ever you do please know that I took your advice. It was difficult but it was fun writing in Itachi's POV (^_^)

Ayane of the night: thank you so much! I never thought a few words could make me grin like crazy. =)

michiko-naoki: hope you'll consider this chapter good too. Thank you so much for taking time to review. A review always makes me want to write more.

woodbyne: OMG I love your reviews! Every time I read them I go back and read the parts of the chapter which you mentioned. (^_^)

I'm already planning on Sai's "somebody". I hope it would come out okay.

Congratulations on the Afrikaans test! You rock! Keep it up!

I apologize in advance for this chapter's ending. But rest assured I will make it up next chapter. Enjoy!

Also a big thank you to those who put this story on their faves/alerts list Inuyashagirl117, Ayane of the night and michiko-naoki.

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Naruto isn't mine.

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_Italics-flashback_

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**chapter 11- obliviously oblivious**

I noticed that a number of students were already starting to crowd around us. I don't give a damn! All I wanted as of the moment was to beat the crap out of the jerk's sorry ass.

"OH MY GOD! SASUKE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Let go of Sai please!" So, my name's back to normal eh? I never thought hearing her call me that could do a number of things to me. Right now, it's mainly rage. She refuses to call me Sasuke since we were kids, claiming that 'Sasucakes' was more _special_ since she was the only person to call me that. Not that I'd allow anyone else to call me that.

"_Sasucakes!" I turned around and saw the Dobe jogging to catch up to me. When he was near enough I let my fist connect with his jaw. He stumbled back a couple of steps._

"_What the fuck Teme!" serves him right calling me something girly. Stupid moron._

"_Stop calling me that, it's stupid," he was rubbing his jaw while glaring at me. I stared back nonchalantly. He was about to shout when we heard someone calling us._

"_Sasucakes! Naru!" the birthday girl, Sakz, was running towards us wearing a stupid party hat. "What took you guys so long! My party is about to start! I only turn fourteen once you know! Now hurry up!" she held our hands and dragged us towards her house. We had no choice but let ourselves get dragged; she IS pretty strong when the situation calls for it. The Dobe was giving me devious looks, I ignored him as usual. _

"_Wait! Sakura-chan I have something for you!" I stopped and looked at the Dobe. I did not see him carrying a present so I was a bit confused as to what he was giving the pinkette. His sly smirk was back. _

"_Yey! What is it Naru?" she clapped her hands, her eyes shining with excitement. tch! What is it with her and presents? When the Dobe took a step closer and bent his head down towards her I had a notion as to what he was going to do. I pulled the back of his shirt and hit his head._

"_What the hell Teme? You just ruined my birthday gift!" birthday gift my ass! Like I'd allow you to kiss her, moron!_

"_Sasucakes?" I looked at Sakz and I gave her my present instead. She directed at me MY smile. The smile I like seeing on her. It makes me feel like I'm a superhero, like I can do anything and everything. What am I saying? She's making me stupid again. I get that a lot lately. What is wrong with me?_

"_Hey, why doesn't she get a hit in the face?" Sakz turned to look at him. "Teme, you looney! You like it when she calls you-" he didn't get to finish his speech. I stopped him with a sharp blow to the head. His indignant protest was drowned in our female companion's laughter. _

_I smiled to myself. I like hearing her laugh. It helps me repress thoughts of being left alone all the time. When my parents attend numerous events around the world for business and Itachi is out of the house, which happens more often than not due to his obligations to the family empire and his busy school activities, the only thing that prevents me from going insane is her laughter. She frequents in my house more when my family is out. She never gave me a reason when I asked her as to why she was always coming over. She just smiles and shrugs my question away._

_She always insists on watching comedies in my room. She'll laugh the day away while I end up sleeping beside her on my big couch. I would drift off to dreamland with her laughter in my ears and her hand playing with my hair. She makes me tenderly drowsy most of the time. And when I wake up with her sleeping on my couch with a smile on her face, I couldn't ask for more. When she's around, I feel content on life. With her, there are no expectations, no pressure, no pretense, and no exertion. I can be who I am and she would still be there with me. She was there, always there. _

"Sai please!" then this stupid ass comes along! Squeezing himself in Sakz' life and when he went away he took her smile, her laugh and her heart away with him. My fist in his hand trembled and my left hand clutching his collar tightened. She's reverting back to using my 'non-special' name because of this jerk! I don't get to see _my _smile and I don't get to hear _my _laughter because of him! She smiles and she laughs but its different, it seems hallow and even fake sometimes. He broke her and he is going to pay!

"I did not do this to her Uchiha-san," I glared at him and was about to hit him again when he continued. "You did," Wait, what? I do not recall doing anything for her to cry like this!

"Sai," I looked down when Sakz whispered his name. "Sai what are you doing?" she looked panic-stricken and she went pale. She held the back of the jerk's shirt with her trembling hands. This infuriated me more. It's like she is holding on to him. Him and not me! She used to trust me with her life and now she's acting as if this bastard held her life in his hands as of the moment.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I pushed him and he took a step backwards. He held Sakz' hand and intertwined it with his fingers. I saw red and aimed for his face. He was looking down on the pinkette and I hit him square on his jaw. I felt a surge of satisfaction when he staggered back. I was about to kick him when a hand was placed on my shoulder.

"This should be interesting," I looked up and saw my brother. He had an amused smirk evident in his face. What is he doing here? I looked back at the object of my rage and saw that Sakz was standing up and cradling his face with tears in her eyes. Fuck! So she gets hurt when the jerk gets hurt too? She loves him that much? I don't know why but I feel sick to my stomach thinking of it. I moved to kick the bastard but the hand on my shoulder squeezed hard.

"I do not think that would be a wise move foolish little brother," his tone was disapproving. "Wouldn't want to upset the apple of your eye now, would we?" he added lowly just enough to reach my ears. I sent him a what-the-fuck glare and he chuckled and shook his head at me. "You are so foolish Sasuke."

I barely noticed the increase in the number of students around us.

"Princess, are you alright?" the scary brothers are here. Good! They should assist me in beating up Sakz' worthless shit of an ex.

The twins, Nagato and Pein, were instantly beside her. Her remaining brother, the most protective of the three, turned to face me.

"What is your problem Uchiha?" I felt somebody snicker behind me. Itachi's whole team is here. What is Akatsuki doing in Konoha High?

"Come on Sasori. Give the brat a break, yeah? If there's anyone to blame, it's Bastard Sr. here."

"Shut your trap Deidara!"

"No you shut up Hidan! If Bastard Sr. had been a good role model, Bastard Jr. wouldn't have been emotionally constipated!"

"Shut the fuck up!"

"You shut the fuck up!"

I drowned out their voices after a minute. I mastered tuning out sounds I did not find important a long time ago. I deemed it a necessity since the stupid Dobe never did learn to shut his mouth. I focused my attention to the events happening in front of me.

Sakz was still sobbing and Nagato was hugging her. Pein was talking to the jerkface and Sasori was glaring at me. I figured that the odds are all against me today.

"…" if they do not agree to what I am doing then I have nothing to say. I just looked straight at Sakz, the anger I felt inside me was still growing.

**Change of POV**

I was not expecting this. When the Alumni president called me about a visit to Konoha High to aid in the promotion of sports, I presumed that it would be a boring activity.

As we passed by the Quadrangle we were greeted by a sight of high school brats surrounding what seemed to be spectacle of teen drama. I was to shrug it off as something mundane when Kisame talked.

"Isn't that your little brother 'tachi?" he chuckled and added, "I think he's trying to beat up somebody. Ah the dramas of high school! Gotta love it!" and the fools with us laughed with him.

"OH MY GOD! SASUKE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Let go of Sai please!" Interesting. It's my brother's pink haired _friend._ A friend he has been undeniably smitten with for years. He may not admit to the fact but everyone within a twelve foot radius would surely agree with me. "Sai please!" Sasuke looked homicidal and what do we have here? A third party? Seeing that my brother did not land a fist in his face then I suppose he is a worthy opponent. Sasuke turns ridiculously green every time his _friend _focuses her attention to somebody other than him. It turns him into a "Super Teme!" as claimed by their blonde playmate.

"I did not do this to her Uchiha-san," he is talking back to an enraged Sasuke, splendid! My foolish little brother would surely take that well. "You did," hmmnnn. This trip was not a waste of time after all. If my brother would get into these kinds of situations more then I would be compelled to visit his school often. As often as my schedule allows me that is.

"What do you think is happening? Shouldn't you go and stop them Tach?" I felt a hand holding on to my right arm. Trust Konan to be concerned of the children. Mother would be proud that her future daughter-in-law agitates herself on matters as trivial as high school drama. They would surely agree with each other on that area.

"It's okay Konan. The pinkette can control Bastard Jr. I've seen her 'turn off' little Sasuke's anger button a thousand times in the past," even my friends are aware of Sasuke's feelings. "Foolish Bastard Jr. just needs to get over his denial to get her you know! I trust that she had been patiently waiting for him for years, although the events happening now suggests otherwise," he motioned to the trio. "Maybe little Pinky got tired of waiting and hooked up with pale ass over there."

"What is happening?" and this makes it more interesting. The arrival of the twins and their younger brother will heighten up the mood today.

"Oh hey Pein! Bastard Jr. is kicking somebody's butt and your little sister will stop him," when will Deidara learn to shut up?

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I turned my attention back to my brother. 3rd Party held Little Pinky's hand. Wrong move 3rd Party, wrong move. If Sasuke had at least a miniscule of control left in him, then that control would be gone by now. I took quick steps towards them, it may be entertaining to watch my brother in action but I have a feeling that four of my companions-the siblings and Konan- wouldn't like it. As predicted, Sasuke delivered a blow to 3rd Party's face. I would have commended him if it was a spar. Seeing that he didn't plan on stopping soon, I made my presence known.

"This should be interesting," I held Sasuke's shoulder. He stopped his assault for a moment to look at me. When he saw that 3rd Party's face was cradled by Little Pinky's hands however, he tried to move towards them again.

"I do not think that would be a wise move foolish little brother," I could physically stop him if needed. I am almost a hundred percent certain that he would be unreasonable. "Wouldn't want to upset the apple of your eye now, would we?" I could not stop myself from adding. His reaction was priceless. "You are so foolish Sasuke," tch! Your denial would one day be the end of you foolish little brother.

"Princess, are you alright?" the ever protective brothers are in action now. Nagato and Pein went to their only sister and Sasori faced us.

"What is your problem Uchiha?" ah the glares. I haven't seen that glare in ages. Foolish Sasuke still does not comprehend why the glares were only directed at him. Tch!

"Come on Sasori. Give the brat a break, yeah? If there's anyone to blame, it's Bastard Sr. here," Deidara, Deidara. When will you learn to stop worthless information leaking from your mouth?

"Shut your trap Deidara!" And here is another one. I still hold respect for Kakuzu for putting up with Hidan's filthy mouth. Eight years of being roommates must have granted him immunity from it.

"No you shut up Hidan! If Bastard Sr. had been a good role model, Bastard Jr. wouldn't have been emotionally constipated!"

"Shut the fuck up!"

"You shut the fuck up!"

"If the two of you won't stop this childish bickering I am going to castrate both of you using a rusted spoon dipped in acid," the two immediately shut up. "I'll do it agonizingly slow too so you'll feel every bit of pain possible," I knew there was a reason why I was together with my amazing girl. She said every word with such a serious composure one would think that she was talking about the stock market. "Now be good and let us focus at the problem at hand," she turned towards Sasuke and smiled sweetly "Sasu-chan, if you won't calm down a big ugly fight will start," she put her hands in her hips. "What seems to be the problem here?"

Sasuke was still glaring holes at 3rd Party's head. "Someone is about to make a stupid decision," he transferred his glare to the pinkette "without thinking of the consequences that she'll produce once the decision is done and over with."

The crying girl looked his way. "What are you talking about? What decision?" she sniffed but she stopped crying and held her head high. "Just because you're pissed doesn't mean you can go around punching somebody's face," she got out from Nagato's hold and faced Sasuke fully. She is getting bolder nowadays. When did she start standing up to my brother? She used to be meek and submissive when Sasuke initiates authority. "Sai didn't do anything to you, why the hell did you punch him you bastard!" her voice was on edge. I heard Zetzu whisper "I think she's gonna blow" behind me. I must say I agree. I looked back and saw that our cousin Tobi was vigorously nodding his head in agreement.

"Whoa! Go pinky!" She gave Deidara a withering look that made the blonde shut up.

"Shut it blondie! This does not concern you!" Heh. Sasuke and I _are_ brothers. I take it that we get attracted to girls who get scary when angry. I wonder how he'll react to this.

"What the hell is going on here?" I did not notice the arrival of two more blondes. "Teme what did you do this time?" he took another look at the little pinkette and glared at Sasuke. "I am so going to kick your ass!"

"What gives you the idea that I did this Dobe!" it is decidedly amusing seeing various colors in my brother's face. He just turned from light red to full blown crimson.

"Forehead only cries like that when you do something stupid Sasuke!" the other blonde went beside the pinkette and sent her own glare to Sasuke. Good! He needs a good amount of those before he finally gets it.

"What the hell are you all talking about?" confusion was evident in his features. I decided to help him a little. I am his brother after all.

"I pity you foolish little brother," I poked his forehead and started to walk away. The snickers around us intensified. "Just admit that you are in love with her already," he looked incredulous. I know he is going to say something he'll regret if he won't be careful. "Your confession is due more than a decade ago," there! Let's see if he turns this into the fairy tale ending Little Pinky wants or the disaster I expect he would bestow upon himself. I suspect that he would do the latter. He _is_ unorthodoxly clueless.

"_Aniki, why are girls stupid?" I stopped writing my essay and looked down on my seven-year old brother. He was pouting and he was holding his left knee. His shirt was dirty and twigs were present in his hair._

"_Has Kaa-san seen you yet?" She would be upset upon seeing her baby Sasu-chan all battered up. I took his hand from his knee and viewed the damage. It was just a tiny scrape. I fairly have an idea of what could have happened. This surely has something to do with- _

"_Sakz cried again," he puffed his cheeks. Just as I suspected, his little friend was a constant topic from him these couple of days. I raised an eyebrow in question. "It's the Dobe's fault!"_

"_No need to shout Sasuke," I removed the twigs that were stubbornly sticking in his hair. "What happened? Did you play ninja and spar with little Uzumaki and lost again?" _

"_I did not lose to that blockhead! He cheated!" I nodded to keep him from going upset. _

_Without further encouragement, he told me his story. _

"_We were playing house because Sakz wanted to and the Dobe was stupid enough to agree," I chuckled. He forgot that he also agreed to it, thereby having him in the same category as the little blonde. The two of them were putty in the little pinkette's tiny hand." and the Dobe said that we needed a momma and a daddy," he looked at me to see if I was paying attention, I smiled at him. "He said that Sakz should be the momma and he should be the daddy but I did not agree," oh, I see where this is going._

"_Why, did you want to be the Daddy?" I inquired feigning disinterest. He reacts violently once you insinuate that he's jealous of the blonde's closeness to the little pinkette._

_He looked down and huffed. Then he crossed his arms and glared at the window. "I told them that it was a stupid game," he stomped his foot and continued "then she cried and the Dobe punched me! So I punched him back!" This is a common occurrence. The three of them play, Sasuke says something stupid, the pinkette cries, the little blonde "protects Sakura-chan's honor" and fights Sasuke, and everyone goes home with tears and a few scrapes. _

"_So girls are stupid because your little friend cried?"_

"_NO! Girls are stupid because when Sakz cried, I wanted to cry with her!" He stomped his foot again. I was a bit taken aback by his answer. "Crying is stupid! And when she makes me cry with her it gets more stupid!" He was waving his hands in frustration. "She makes me act stupid so girls are stupid!" He almost lost his breathe after his little speech. _

His cluelessness before could be attributed to his tender age, but being obliviously oblivious at eighteen is just plain ridiculous.

The snickers quieted down as the crowd waited for his answer. I was a few feet away when I heard him sputter. Sasuke never sputters.

"Huh. Wah? What? Itachi you bastard! What are you talking about?" I turned around and looked at him. Poor Sasuke, you don't know what you've gotten yourself into. "I don't love her, I mean how could I love her?" You are digging your own hole, "She's Sakz! Sakz! My friend since forever! You have got to be joking!" And I truly hope you could get your way out.

I moved my eyes towards little Pinky. Her eyes were wide and full of betrayal and hurt. Sasuke's eyes followed my lead. He let out an "Oh shit!" and extended his hand towards her. She took a step backwards and looked at him straight in the eyes with tears running down her cheeks.

"I hate you Sasuke."

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ahmm..

Don't hate me?

Did my Itachi POV come out okay? whacha think about the chapter? review please!


	12. waiting to realize

Yo!

This chapter was supposed to be posted ages ago, but the site just had to prevent me from doing so. Every time I try to edit the story it goes network error yadda yadda. I'm frustrated. I wanted to post it early so I could hear more of your lovely reviews.

illneverknow: thank you! I guess the chapter was effective if it wanted to make you cry. I intended for the chapter to focus on Saku's feelings towards Sasu's denial without using her POV. This next chapter would be in Saku's POV so be prepared for a lot of hurt feelings. (^^,)

Ayane of the night: yep, he is isn't he? Makes me want to hit him bad. Hehe..Thanks for sticking around!

EndlessFlame911: Thank you for that really long review! (^_^) I kinda like the thought of Sasu and Saku waking up next to each other after their naps. I find it really cute! And I love Deidara and Hidan so I had to insert a dialogue or two by them. And Sasori is my favorite Akatsuki next to Itachi so he gets be a "star" in the story. hehe

I read the chapter again and you were right. I do have lots of unspecific dialogue. I'll try rectifying that in later chaps. =)

woodbyne: I love the flashbacks too!hehe. And Naru already knew about Saku's feelings towards Sasu but he'e being a dobe as usual, gotta love Naru and his quirks!

Sai's somebody will appear in chapter 13 or 14. (^_^)

You'll get to see more of angry and feeling betrayed Saku in this chapter.

Wow! The good kind of stress!haha. I hope reading this chapter causes that again. I know how much of a bummer school could be sometimes.

Kate Uchiha: Sasu is chicken alright! He's scared and he's insecure.

And shouting out random bad words at him is justifiable. Good thing you didn't yell it out in your class. Don't want you to get in trouble. ^^,

I agree! Tachi rules!

Thanks for the review guys!

Thank you to 101AnimeProductions, Narutofreaks123, totalride321 and iLOVEmee for adding BttB to their faves list.

Enjoy!

(\(^_^)/)

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Naruto isn't mine.

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_italics: flashback_

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**Chapter 12: waiting to realize**

I endured this long, I can still wait. I can wait. I _will_ wait. How long have I waited? Too long. How long will I last? I'm not sure. How long 'til this ends? Forever?

Why the fuck should I wait? I've been waiting so long it hurts! Why am I waiting again? I glanced at Sasucakes. He was still angrily glaring at me. What is he angry at me for? I didn't do anything!

"Someone is about to make a stupid decision, without thinking of the consequences that she'll produce once the decision is done and over with."

What the hell? I know I told him to blame this shitload on me, but damn this is pissing me off! My head wants to explode and my feet are killing me. I'm tired and I don't need his bastardy ways to make things worse. I've always blamed myself for the things that make him hurt, make him mad or make him sad. My mind goes on auto and tells my whole being that it's my fault, my fault that I wasn't able to protect him from all the pains the world throws at him.

"_When will you learn, Forehead? I told you not to help him with his stupid surprise! Look at what it got you? He's not worth having fever and chills you know? He's a class A jerk and you know it! Why do like torturing yourself?" I don't know Ino. I don't know. _

"_Sakura-chan? Are you okay? Do I need to kick his ass again? What happened last night? Why is he more of a bastard today? It's Karin's birthday, right? Shouldn't he be over at her house right now? Why are you sniffling? Teme you bastard! Where the hell are you? Shikamaru! Wake up! I need you to figure out where the Teme is so I can kick his pale ass! Sakura-chan isn't talking again!" Oh Naru. Thank you so much for caring. _

"_Hime? Are you still with me? You're drifting away again. If you want we could watch his game instead of going to the art show?" Sai. Why can't I bring myself to fall in love with you? If only I could._

I've hurt myself gazillion times in gazillion different ways because of you Sasucakes and this is how do you repay me? You hit one of the few people that made me happy, made me feel good about myself. Why the hell did you punch Sai? What is your problem?

"What are you talking about? What decision?" I am so tired of all this crying! My life has always been centered around you, you bastard! "Just because you're pissed doesn't mean you can go around punching somebody's face," and you are making it really hard for me. Why can't you just let me love you like I want to? I'm not asking for anything big, just let me be around you, I just want to be around you and not hurt myself in the process. I'm so tired and I will not allow this to continue! From now on, I vow not to cry because of you! I will not allow myself to get hurt by you!

I moved so I was facing him. I got out of Nagato-nii's hug and raised my head. Pig is right, I should love myself a little more and love you a little less. I am taking a stand! I will not cry anymore! "Sai didn't do anything to you, why the hell did you punch him you bastard!"

"Whoa! Go pinky!" I glanced at Deidara-san and glared at him.

"Shut it blondie! This does not concern you!" I heard Tachi-nii chuckle at my response to the blonde.

"What the hell is going on here?" I was so focused on my bubbling anger towards the raven that I didn't notice my friends arriving, "Teme what did you do this time?" I smiled to myself. He may be best friends with the bastard but Naru had always been on my side."I am so going to kick your ass!" This is the most common line he spouts when he sees me cry, sometimes it makes me laugh. Almost everyone blames Sasuke when they see me cry. I can't blame them though. My tears are in one way or another connected to him.

"What gives you the idea that I did this Dobe!" And he calls himself a genius! You just don't get it, do you? Everyone knows how much I love you, everyone _but_ you. Why are you so clueless?

"Forehead only cries like that when you do something stupid Sasuke!" Pig stood beside me and glared at him. Among all my friends, she is the most protective when it comes to issues like this. Since it's her room I always go to when I'm in my "Sasuke-induced depression", she fairly gets a huge amount of information about my stupidity over our clueless playboy. She always tells me that he is beyond help and that I should just move on and try something new. With _new,_ she meant casual dating and the likes. I just can't bring myself to do it.

"What the hell are you all talking about?" He looked confused. He looks really childish when he's confused. It brings me back to our childhood years. They're wrong. He isn't that heartless. He could still revert back to being _my _Sasucakes. I trust him, I know deep inside he is still that sweet, innocent, girl-respecting Sasucakes I know. If only-

Great! How am I supposed to get over him? I barely last five minutes in my vow and this happens. I start convincing myself that he's good for me. That he's all I'll ever need. He's the only one for me and that's it. It's either him or no one at all.

"I pity you foolish little brother," I heard amusement in Tachi-nii's words. I heard snickers around us too and I was surprised to see a good number of students, not to mention the whole Akatsuki surrounding us. This is kind of embarrassing. "Just admit that you are in love with her already," wait a minute! Did he just say that his little brother is in love with me? I whipped my head so I could see Sasucakes' reaction. He looked disbelieving and guarded. His whole expression shouted denial. Tachi-nii is wrong. He doesn't love me. "Your confession is due more than a decade ago," my eyes were wide as saucers. Could it be? Was I that blind not to notice that he has feelings for me? Was I hitting myself over the head for nothing? Did we love each other all along but never had the guts to actually say it in each other's faces?

"Huh. Wah? What? Itachi you bastard! What are you talking about?" Okay. So I was wrong, I knew I shouldn't have allowed myself to hope. I can feel the familiar ache in my throat."I don't love her; I mean how could I love her?" Can you please shut up now? I don't need everyone hearing what you have to say. I know you don't love me, I get it!

Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, and breathe out. I will not cry! I won't! Not in front of all these people, not in front of you. Not anymore. "She's Sakz! Sakz! My friend since forever! You have got to be joking!" Oh my God shut up! It hurts enough to hear you say that you _can't_ love me but to have you think of it as a joke? It's too much! I won't cry, I won't! I've cried enough, I've cried more than enough.

Despite my efforts, tears ran down my cheeks. I hate him. He just _had _to do this _now?_! With everyone listening? We're friends; can't he have at least a little decency and break my heart _more_ without the entire student body knowing? He could have pulled me somewhere unpopulated and told me 'Hey I don't love you, I will never love you so get lost'. Damn this hurts! This hurts bad!

"Oh shit!" Yep! You are so full of shit! He tried holding me but I stepped away.

"I hate you Sasuke," I really do! I hate you! How could you do this to me?

"Sakz," he reached out for me again. This time Ino stepped in front of me.

"What more do you want bastard? Is this not enough? Do you want the whole world to know that you don't love her? That you _can't _love her?" I looked at my shoes while Pig talked. I don't want him to see that what he did hurt me. "She had her chance to be happy with Sai but you just had to ruin it!" maybe he likes to see me hurt. "If it wasn't for you, she would still be happy with him! Who gave you the right to hurt her huh? Who the hell do you think you are you bastard?"

"He cheated on her, why are you blaming me when he was the one who cheated?" Sai was drunk. You got him drunk. Did you really want to hurt me that bad? You had to resort to sly measures to make him do what he did?

I am so fed up with this. I stepped in front of Ino and glared at him.

"You know what? I have suffered this long enough! I am so sick and tired of you controlling my happiness all the time!" he looked shocked at my words. I couldn't help but remember what happened two years ago.

_"Guys! How about spending the weekend at the Sabaku's beach house?" Ino was bouncing on Naru's bed in excitement. It was a friday and we were all at Naru's for our 'monthly group gathering'. "It's Gaara's birthday and he invited Forehead," she wiggled her eyebrows at me. "Somebody has an admirer!" She added in a singsong voice. Almost everyone in the room laughed. Everyone but Sasucakes. He has this unhealthy rivalry with Raraa. I don't know how it started but Naru insists that it had something to do with me. I don't really know why he said it though._

_"You're crazy Ino. Raraa isn't an admirer. He just likes my company because unlike you, I am amazingly amazing! I don't go around spouting nonsense all the time," I continued playing with Sasucakes' hair, it was so soft that I couldn't help but touch it. I was sitting on the couch while he and Naru were on the floor playing Ultimate Ninja 8. He had his back leaned on my lower legs. I heard the familiar shout of a dying ninja before Naru jumped._

_"Take that Teme! It is I, the amazing Uzumaki Naruto, that beat your sorry ass!" He did a victory dance and I laughed. He almost always lost when they play with each other, he gets a temporary high each time he wins. "What were you talking about again? I think I heard someone mention Gaara," him ang Raraa had always been close._

_"I am telling Forehead that Gaara has a not so little crush on her and she is denying it," Pig got off the bed and stood in the middle of the room. "Every one knows how much Forehead likes the beach. Gaara is to have his party on the beach thereby proving my point that he is crushing on her." _

_"I stand by my statement, you are crazy! Raraa likes the beach! That is why he-" she cut me off with a wave of her hand. Stupid Pig!_

_"No no no no. Garaa is FOND of sand but he does not LIKE the beach! Why do you think he's so pale? It is because he doesn't go to the beach," she nodded for emphasis. Shikamaru who was sleeping woke up because of her loud rant. He looked around and saw me and Ino glaring at each other. He muttered"Troublesome women" right before he went back to sleeping._

_"Your logic astounds me Pig! He doesn't go out much because he burns easily. Remind me to bring my ultra powerful sunblock when we go alright? I am so going to enjoy his birthday! He will enjoy the beach whether he likes it or not because I am going to DRAG him outside if its the last thing I do!" I haven't been to the beach in ages! I am SO going to have a blast!_

_"You go girl!" Tennie jumped up and joined our excitement. "And while you're at it don't forget your ultra amazing red bikini! I'm sure he'll love that!" What is it with these girls and their wiggling eyebrows? It's disturbing!_

_"Oh no! Not you too Tennie!" They're ganging up on me! If Hina joins in-_

_"She's right Saku, you do look good in that red bikini," Hina smiled at me. If she wiggles her eyebrows at me I swear I'll do something horrible! Good thing Hina was mature enough not to follow Pig's underhanded tactics.  
_

_I stood up the couch and jumped. "Then its settled! Sabaku beach house here we come!" Everyone jumped and cheered. Well, the girls and Naru did, the rest just smiled and slept._

_"You're not going," we got quiet when Sasucakes talked._

_"What? But why Teme? Sakura-chan needs a day off!" Naru was staring at him while he talked. It looked like he wanted to add something more when Sasucakes stood._

_"Yeah Sasuke. Forehead needs a down time after winning the Olympiad. She had been doing nothing but facing those horrible books!" Pig is right, I do feel I need the down time. The beach would be perfect._

_"Sasucakes?" He looked at me before he talked._

_"You are not going Sakz," but why? I hate it when he says something and doesn't elaborate further._

_"Why can't I go? I really wanna go!" I wanted to stomp my foot in frustration!_

_"You are not going because I will not be there," he took a deep breathe and looked out the window._

_"Huh?" Great. Really articulate Sakura, very good, so much for winning the Olympiad, That 'huh' was a really smart thing to say._

_"The last time you went there you almost died," oh. I almost drowned last time. If he wasn't there I could have died. _

_But still! We were younger then and I'm a big girl now! I can take care of myself!_

_When weekend came, I didn't get to go. Sasucakes went to my house and prevented other people from getting in, as well as preventing me from getting out. If only my family was home. Sasucakes couldn't have prevented me from going out if my brothers were home._

I glared at him more. Raraa's 16th birthday wasn't the only event he prevented me from going. He was being a bastard about each one too! So what if he wouldn't be there! It's not like I'd get hurt when he's not around. In fact, I get hurt MORE when he's with me! So his purpose about keeping me from hurting myself is stupid! He IS stupid! I can't believe I let him DO that to me!

I clenched my fist and gave him a right hook. He staggered back and held his jaw. Sasori-nii taught me well. I was sure his pretty face would have a bruise in the morning. "That was for Sai," I moved my right foot and connected it with his gut. "And that, was for Me," he grunted in pain. "Be thankful that I feel extremely angelic today, if not you wouldn't have the chance to father little Uchiha brats."

"Nice one Princess," Pein-nii sounded amused and I heard Nagato-nii cheer me on.

I heard cheers all around me too but I paid it no heed. I'm hurt and silently bleeding. I am giving my last goodbye to the love of my life.

"Sakz I-", I didn't let him finish, I don't want to hear what he has to say. He has this way of talking to me that makes me melt. I can't afford to go weak now, I want to say something and I will say it.

"I was not born to insist myself on someone who doesn't want Me," he looked up at me. Yes, listen and listen well. "I give love, yes; in fact I can easily fall for someone who makes me feel special," he looked really puzzled. "But when I sense that that person wants to get rid of me, I won't waste time. I've already felt how it was to be neglected. Love doesn't just fade away, I know," I am getting the last say in this. I will forget you, if it's the last thing I do. "But I can contradict my own feelings in order for me to function properly," there was something in his eyes that seemed to bother me. It's like he is gauging me again. Just like he did that time when he took me in the field to catch falling stars. I looked him straight in the eyes and I felt like I wanted to drown in them. No, I will get over you! I will! "You were never really healthy for me Sasuke. Goodbye," and I walked away with my head held high.

I heard Naru shout "Take that Teme!" Man that felt good! I can't believe hitting people could feel so fulfilling. That's why bullies do what they do. Well, those bullies better not cross my path because from now onwards, Haruno Sakura is fighting back!

"Hime," I looked behind me to find Sai. He was smiling, a real smile this time. "That was unexpected."

"Yeah Forehead! Didn't know you had it in you!" Pig was walking, more like strutting, real fast to catch up to us.

"I didn't know I had it in me too you know. Sai are you okay?" He nodded. Good! "Let's go to the Nurse's station. You might need to put an icepack on your jaw." I feel lightheaded. Why is the room spinning? My vision was blurring and my feet felt lifeless.

"Forehead!"

"Hime!"

I never got to answer them. The world turned black and I felt myself fall down.

**Change of POV**

"Sasu-chan? Are you okay?" I couldn't help but smile at my girlfriend's concern over my little brother.

We were walking towards his dorm. He was too stubborn to take a trip to the school clinic. The others had to restrain the Haruno brothers so as not to cause further damage to my little brother's person. One little Haruno was enough. I feel that my brother had learned his lesson.

"He is fine Konan. I have a feeling that his male ego took most of the blow," his girl packed a punch. I commend her speed and strength. "Your little girlfriend is feisty little brother."

"Shut the fuck up Itachi!" He was looking at the direction little Pinky took. "Did you hear what she was saying back there?" His voice was so low, it was barely audible.

"Of course I did. Everyone within the vicinity did," I hope he already realized what I have been trying to tell him for the longest amount of time.

"Do you think she feels something for me?" I never thought I'd live long enough to hear my ever confident little brother so unsure of himself. I could not ruin the fun by telling him myself. Little Pinky's agony must have been great enough to have caused her to do what she just did. I knew her to be a sweet and gentle girl, that is, if not provoked. It would not be fair if I let Sasuke off the hook. He, himself should have his share of agony. Heh. I love being a big brother.

"What do you think little brother?" he glared at me. Tch! Like that would affect me, I practically taught him how to do that.

"Would I be asking you if I knew the answer? I'm not stupid!" I find this side of Sasuke amusing. I really should spend more time with him.

"You actually believe that? If you claim to be 'not stupid', why are you stupidly acting stupid?" I felt Konan pinch my arm. I stopped my verbal abuse. What? It was painful! And I am merely ensuring a warm bed when we return to my pad.

"Tch! You are whipped! You have got it bad aniki," I looked at my little brother coolly.

"It is better to be whipped and be happy than not whipped and be miserable little brother," Konan laughed at both of us. We had already arrived at Sasuke's dorm. I hugged her from behind and kissed her hair. Sasuke was looking at us with a queasy expression. I smirked at him.

"I cannot believe you agreed to be together with him Konan. What the hell did you see in him?" Tch! Sasuke, you never learn.

"The same thing Sakura-chan sees in you I guess," she ruffled his hair and continued. "There are few of us that get attracted to class A jerks," and she laughed.

"You think she likes me?" the insecurity in his voice was evident.

"What do you think?" She smirked and I laughed at Sasuke's face.

"You have been spending too much time with my brother Konan. It's not good for you," I waved him off.

"Go inside and rest little brother, and think about just what happened," he better not ruin this. If he does not get it right the second time, I have a feeling that he won't be getting a third chance. "And do not do anything foolish."

"Why do you always assume that I would do something foolish aniki?" He looked seven again. He always seems so vulnerable when it comes to issues concerning the pinkette.

"Because you always fail to think straight when it concerns your little friend baby brother," his forehead creased and he put his hands in his pockets, a sign that he was feeling defensive. I poked his forehead and smiled at him. "Pull yourself together and do it right next time."

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hmmnnnn...I wanted to let Saku's bros beat Sasu up but I personally thought being beaten by a 'little' girl would be more embarrassing. Go Sakura!

review pls!


	13. love? no way!

Yo!

I edited most of the chapters. Well not most but all of the chaps I think. I reread it and saw numerous errors. I apologize if I flooded you email with fanfic alerts!

This chap is a little short, but I hope you'd still like it.

illneverknow: Don't worry, I'm not that cruel. Hehe.

I'm sensing something, did you experience that? Realizing that you love somebody just when he/she had fallen out of love with you already? That must suck huh? I feel for ya!

Anyway, thanks for the review! ^_^

woodbyne: As always, your wonderful review got me writing a little faster than normal. Hehe

I was supposed to end with Saku fainting last chapter but then I thought about the previous cliffies I already did and continued on. You're the only one who got that it was a sneaky-ninja-cliffie ending, you really are an amazing reader! ^_^

You're right about Sasu's 2nd chance being hard already. He's just so clueless that I myself want to kick him senseless for his 'snail-like' pace in realizing his feelings.

BadassAlec: That frustrating huh? What do you say we hit Sasuke together then? I'll go get the baseball bat and we'll hit him to our heart's content? I doubt Sakura would appreciate it though. Hehe

EndlessFlame911: There are a lot of us wanting to beat up Sasu. Hehe.

I actually put up a slight hint of GaaSaku because of you. I was thinking of when you'll post your story when I told myself that I should give Gaara a major part in the story. You'll hear more of Gaara in future chaps too!

Ayane of the night: Thank you for taking time to review! So glad that you liked that chapter. That chap was my 2nd favorite, with obliviously oblivious having the top spot. Hehe

Kate Uchiha: Yep! Sasuke is so full of himself! I could just say that he'll try to change his ways but I doubt his superiority complex and huge ego would deflate sometime soon. Poor Saku was too tired that her body shut down on her. She's fine though, she'll wake up after a couple of minutes.

I viewed your profile and read Temptation. Two thumbs up! d(^_^)b

crazymel2008: No worries, Saku won't give in that easily. I'll let Sasu sufffeeerrrrrr! *evil laugh*

Enjoy!

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_italics-flashback_

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naruto isn't mine

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**Chapter 13: love? no way!**

"What the hell happened?" a voice that sounds so much like Nej exclaimed. Although it couldn't have been Nej, it sounds like an echo of his voice. I could hear whispers around me too but I couldn't distinguish who's doing it.

"Shhhhhhh! Not so loud Neji! You'll disturb her!" Now the voice sounds like Ino-Pig. She's telling them to pipe down when she herself is loud enough to wake the dead. Typical Ino-Pig.

"Stupid Teme!" It sounds like Naru now. What the hell is happening?

It's like I'm inside a really big dome and there were hushed voices/sounds floating all around me. Maybe I'm dreaming. I'm dreaming of my friends. I should go back to sleep. I hardly ever dream of things other than _him _so I'll grab this opportunity. I held on to the last vestiges of my sleep and sighed. Quality sleep, here I come.

**Change of POV**

For the first time in my life I had nothing to say. Sakura-chan looks so peaceful lying on the school clinic's bed. If not for the rise and fall of her stomach and chest I would have called for an ambulance. In fact, I almost did, only Hina-chan stopped me. Saying her vital signs is normal. What the hell are vital signs? Are they some sort of signal or something?

"Stupid Teme!" He just had to be a bastard! "Are you sure she's okay Hina-chan? I want to take her to the hospital," I looked at Sakura-chan helplessly. "Please let me take her to the hospital!" I'm getting a little bit restless looking at her all motionless!

"She is fine Naruto-kun. Her blood pressure is normal, so as her heart rate and temperature. Her breathing looks fine too. If her vital signs show abnormality, the nurse will call for an ambulance," oh so that's what vital signs mean. Hina-chan is so smart. I'm so lucky to have her as my friend.

"Sakura-chan," I whispered. Ino gives us death glares when we speak loudly. I want to end your suffering and tell you that Teme loves you as much or maybe more than you love him. It's just that he's being a total bastard about it.

"_So you're basically saying that you haven't been in love Sasucakes?" Sakura-chan was playing with Teme's hair again. They got into the argument when Sakura-chan got all sappy after watching her favorite movie. Teme practically dragged me to watch it with them, saying that if he has to endure the chick flick, I too must endure it with him. Some best friend he turned out to be. _

_I was playing with my PS2 and didn't bother to join their banter. Playing Ultimate Ninja 8 is way more fun than arguing with Sakura-chan. At least I have a chance of winning in the game, with Sakura-chan I'm bound to lose. Because if ever by chance I do win, I'd still be losing because Sakura-chan packs a strong punch!  
_

"_Love is for those who are weak," I looked beside me and saw that Teme had his eyes closed. He had his head in Sakura-chan's lap and he was holding her favorite pillow on his stomach. I'm a hundred percent sure that he'll fall asleep eventually. He doesn't want to admit it but I know that he likes it when she plays with his hair. "It is a word people use to explain their stupid actions towards their significant other."_

"_Whatever Sasucakes!" Sakura-chan slapped Teme's forehead playfully. Teme opened his eyes and stared at Sakura-chan. He may not notice it but his eyes have this unique way of looking at her. They go incredibly soft, like he's in his 'happy place'. He usually looks at people with steely eyes, but when it comes to Sakura-chan it's different. "I still say that you eventually will! You just don't want to admit it!" Teme gave out an "hn" before closing his eyes again._

"_I will never fall in love," Sakura-chan raised an eyebrow at Teme's statement. I'm pretty sure she wants the bastard to fall in love, preferably with her. She wants to have his Uchiha babies and live happily ever after with him._

_Both of them are nuts. Can't they see the special looks they give to each other? They may think I'm oblivious to everything but I am not. I can clearly see their mutual affection. _

"_Oh really now?" She huffed and stared at the window. "It's alright. Being in love isn't all that nice sometimes anyway," Teme's eyes opened at that._

"_So you are saying that you actually have fallen in love with somebody?" I paused my game and watched the more interesting show in front of me. Teme is turning green again. I have to be ready for battle._

"_Sakz, answer me, " Teme sat up and held Sakura-chan's shoulder and turned her to him when she didn't answer him. "Look at me when I'm talking to you." _

_In less than five minutes I may have to kick his ass again._

"_Huh?" Sakura-chan was a little bit startled. Upon seeing Teme's expression, she smiled. "Of course I've fallen in love!" Her smile turned dreamy and I could feel Teme's temper rising. After years of being best friends with them I fairly have an idea as to what will happen next. "Right now, I'm saving myself for him, I've wished on every star I could catch that he'll love me back. It would take a long time but I know that if I ask more than enough and love him as deeply as I could, he'll come around." Teme let go of her and stood._

"_What makes you think he'll fall in love with you?" Sakura-chan flinched. Man Teme, you're harsh! "He won't fall in love with you because-"_

"_OKAY FINE!" Sakura-chan's eyes turned sad. "No need to shout to the world of how unlovable I am okay?" She stood on the couch and glared at him. For such a pretty boy, Teme sure as hell doesn't know how to talk to the ladies. Every time he opens his mouth, the wrong words come out. Now, Sakura-chan thinks that Teme finds her repulsive when all he wants to tell her is that he won't allow anyone to have her because he wants her for himself. He just doesn't know how to say it. He doesn't know that he WANTS to say it too. Stupid Teme. "Why do you love to torture me Sasucakes?" Here we go again._

"_What the hell are you talking about?" Teme is already seething and Sakura-chan had tears on her cheeks._

_Well, I have to do my part now. I have to protect Sakura-chan's honor! Believe it!_

"_TEME! I'm going to kick your pale ass!"_

I chuckled to myself. We haven't done that in years! I sighed and looked around me. Where is that bastard anyway? He should be here by now. He's usually the first to arrive when Sakura-chan is in some sort of trouble.

**Change of POV**

What the hell just happened?

I refuse to admit having fault at this. Why does Aniki think that I'm in love with her? And what is it with her and her rather loud speech at the Quad? Does she have feelings for me or something? Why didn't she inform me of such feelings?

I looked at the lone photo on my computer table. It was of me, the Dobe and Sakz. We had a group project with Kakashi as our mentor. Kakashi was behind us and he had his hand on my head, his other hand in the Dobe's head. Sakz was beaming at the camera. I held the photo in my hand.

What did you mean Sakz? Why can't you just say it straight to my face instead of giving me statements that aren't black or white but gray? You give me a hard time figuring you out all the time. First you act all cheerful and literally jump all around me; next you ignore me and give me the silent treatment when I don't even know what I did. Then, the accusing eyes that make me feel guilty even if I know I did nothing wrong.

You make me do things I don't normally do. You make me say things I don't normally say.

"_Sasucakes, I'm feeling lonely. Can we watch my favorite movie? Please oh please oh please oh please?" I have to go home early tonight. I have an Algebra exam the next day._

"_You have seen that movie countless times Sakz. You can even say the dialogues better than those actors,"_ _I looked down at her and saw her downhearted expression. I sighed. I've studied enough this morning anyway. "Fine, but no weird questions after the movie," she'll drive me nuts with her whining if I don't give in anyway so what's the use of refusing. "I have told you a million times that I do not know why Jamie has to die and I don't think that Landon IS her freaking miracle," she looked like she wanted to protest but I beat her to it. "And no asking for fake tattoos either. It's late, the stores are closed, and my stocks are all out," she looked at me ruefully. "Do not give me that look. It is not my fault that you wanted six butterfly tattoos on your shoulder last time."_

"_But it wouldn't be complete without the tattoo Sasucakes!" She complained but she had on MY smile. I smiled back._

I haven't watched A Walk to Remember in a while. I'd watch it a million times more if it means that she would be there sniffling beside me; I don't care if my shirt gets wet from her tears. Better me than some other jerk!

"_Dobe, have you seen Sakz? She is supposed to be here by now," Aniki is waiting in the chopper and we have to reach our beach house before dark or Mother will be disappointed. She loves taking pictures of the three of us in the beach. She has collections of it in her numerous albums. She had a "cutiepie Naruto", "lovely Sakura-chan", and a "baby Sasu-chan" beach album. Sometimes I wonder how she puts up with Father or how Father puts up with her. They have such different personalities. _

"_She's over here somewhere talking with Gaara. Something about his Biology project," Dobe smirked at me after answering my query. "Don't you dare go Super Teme on Gaara, Sakura-chan will gut you if you do." Super Teme? What the hell Dobe?_

_I turned away from him and started to look around._

_That fucking jerk! What the hell is he doing here? Sand has a different curriculum from Leaf! He can't possibly ask Sakz about his stupid project! Wind country is seriously far from Fire country too! Stupid redhead! _

_I found them under a tree beside our house. Sakz was latched on to the jerk as usual. She had a big grin on her face. The jerk is enjoying her company too! Tch! I have this insane urge to kick that smirk off his face!_

_I walked briskly towards them with every intention of dragging Sakz away and punching the living daylights out of Sabaku. His reasons get lamer and lamer each time! _

_I was about twelve meters away from them when somebody grabbed my arm._

"_Where are you going little brother?" I looked up and saw my Aniki. He looked at me and then turned towards Sakz and the stupid redhead. "Don't be stupid Sasuke, he is the son of Father's biggest associate in Wind country. You don't want to make Father upset, do you?" _

_I don't give a shit whoever he is! My expression must have said what was on my mind because he continued. "Let's put it this way," he let go of my arm and flicked my forehead. I hate it when he does that, it makes me feel like a little boy. "If Father is upset, Mother would be upset as well. Do you want to upset Mother?"_

_I huffed and muttered an indignant "Fine!" He chuckled and ruffled my hair. "What are you doing here anyway? I thought you were getting ready to fly the chopper," he hates bringing mansion staff when he travels so he basically learned to drive/fly/navigate every vehicle we have._

"_Little Blondie told me that you were turning into a Super Teme again."_

"_Shut the fuck up Itachi!"_

I do stupid things for her. I say stupid things when I'm around her. I feel stupid when she gets mad and I don't know why. I act stupid when I see her with another guy.

And right now she is making me stupid again with her speech at the Quad a while ago! I thought I already got over this stupidity shit!

There was a knock on the door. I didn't get up from my bed. I'm not in the mood for any conversation right now. After a few more knocks, the door opened. It was Hyuuga and he looked pissed.

"I have been assigned to retrieve Sakura's belongings," he went inside uninvited and got Cherry and the unnamed overnight bag. I smiled to myself while I was looking at the big red bag. Who in their right mind would name an inanimate object? "Uchiha," I looked up at Hyuuga. He hesitated for a moment and added, "I advise you not to come near the girls in our group," he turned around and before he got out he added again, "better yet, stay away from everyone in our group, if you know what is good for you."

"Why should I do that Hyuuga?" I stood up and glared at his back. What right does he have threatening me like that?

"I personally have had enough of your obliviousness Uchiha. I am a very patient person," he turned around and looked at me. "The others are rather impatient so think about how they would feel," he looked at the photo I was holding, "it has been more than a decade Uchiha, I do not want to hear you whining about how you lost everything just because of your erroneous belief that falling in love is stupid."

"I don't know what you are talking about Hyuuga."

"Tell that to yourself Uchiha," he smirked and turned around again. "And do not attempt to come near us if you have yet to figure out a solution for your present predicament."

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review please!


	14. to be or not to be

yo!

Back with chapter 14. It's a little different form the other ones and a little shorter but I hope you guys will like it. It focuses more on Sasu's conflicting feelings towards Saku.

illneverknow: Oh that sucks. Don't worry; you'll get over it in time. Sasuke WILL realize it really soonish! (^_^) Thanks for the review!

Madam Chika: I do agree with you at some point. What Saku did was a bit childish. But we have to understand that she just experienced a very stressful situation. She felt betrayed and was too tired to deal with what's happening to think of the people around her. And Sasu also had said something that upset her, and she felt embarrassed. I actually like Sasuke in this story, he's sweet and protective and he values his relationships in his own way (albeit he's a bit of a bastard) and shows it in the wrong ways, I'm just a bit biased because I know somebody who is currently experiencing Saku's predicament. (^_^)

Loved hearing your thoughts! Thanks for the review!

EndlessFlame911: It would be really funny having a super hero version of Super Teme! With a costume and all that jazz. He'll have a sidekick named Super Dobe! lol. Be sure to let me see once you decide to draw it. Gaara won't be in this chap yet but he will make an appearance next chapter. Sasu and Saku just NEED to talk with each other. It's just that Saku is too much of a coward to tell Sasu how she feels and Sasu is too much of a bastard admit to himself that he's in love with his best female friend. Although I do want to hit Sasuke for the awful things he usually spouts out.

You like Gaara too huh? That makes two of us! If I see him I'd go "GAARAAAAA!" *flails and faints*

woodbyne: I love Neji too! He's like a mini version of Itachi, just a little bit more approachable. I've said it once, I'll say it again, Itachi rocks! \../(^_^)\../

I'm working on getting Naru and Hina together. It's just a little slower coz Naru is currently finding ways to help his best friends to get together. (^_^)

Sasu really needs help with his communication skills! I wanna give him something like "How to talk to them Ladies: book for dummies". I'm sure it could help a lot to stop the hurtful/damaging words he spouts.

lol. You really went back to the previous chaps to get Tayuya and Ami's name? That makes me really happy! It shows how engrossed you are with Sasu and Saku's current problem.

Sai's gift was supposed to make an appearance this chap but since she lives from a different country, I had to postpone it til later chaps. I already had the outline of said chap so we'll meet her soon!

enjoy!

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naruto isn't mine

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**Chapter 14: to be or not to be**

Peace. I felt strangely at peace. I turned sideways on my bed and felt warmth on the pillow beside me. Did I sleep with somebody last night? I don't recall doing anything with anyone. Was I drunk last night?

Somebody opened the blinds; I felt sunlight touching my face. I didn't open my eyes. I still want to sleep dammit! It must have been Itachi who opened the blinds. He finds waking me up entertaining. I'm not a morning person, I snap at people when I wake up. I am going to kick his ass after I have my coffee.

I heard somebody giggle. Who the hell was that? The bed moved. Somebody had stepped on my bed and is now approaching me. The giggles were still present. Itachi doesn't giggle, does he? Is he high or something? I'm telling Mother that he's on drugs.

A small hand cradled my face, all the while giggling. I stubbornly kept my eyes closed and hugged the pillow I held tighter. Whoever it was who decided to disturb my peace should just go to-

"Tou-san!" Huh? I opened my eyes. Jade orbs were blinking at me.

"Tou-san! Tou-san! Tou-san! Tou-saaaaannn!" There was a toddler in front of me. He was happily jumping up and down on his knees beside me. He held the pillow I was currently hugging and pulled it away. "Wake up Tou-san!" He held my hand and tried to pull me up. I was still disoriented as the information in front of me was hard to process. My brain seemed to work as slow as it can get. The Dobe's stupidity is contagious after all. "You're heavy Tou-san," the toddler pouted and scowled at me. I let myself get pulled up and he smiled. I smiled back hesitantly. He must have noticed my hesitation for he asked, "Are you alright Tou-san?"

"Ahm yes?" He looked doubtful and he crossed his tiny arms. After a minute or two he smiled and poked my forehead. I touched the part where he poked and he laughed. Who is this kid? He resembles my aniki, except for the eyes. Did Itachi have a hidden love child somewhere that we did not know about? And why is he calling me his Tou-san?

"So did ya make her already?" Make what? I did not answer him. I was still confused as to what he meant. He stopped jumping and scowled at me again. "Tou-san!" He whined. Tch! He sounds like Sakz when he does that. He crinkles his nose like she does too. Speaking of Sakz, I need to talk to her. Shit! If she sees this kid, she's going to think that I impregnated somebody! "Tou-san you are not paying attention! I demand that you answer me!" Tch! Arrogant little tyke!

I decided to humor him. "Make what?" He beamed at me and started jumping up and down again.

"Did ya make me a sister? You did, didn't ya?" He clapped his hands and continued jumping. "Uncle Naru said that if I stayed over at their house and be a good boy you'd make me a sister!" He squealed and jumped at me. The impact made me lie down again. The giggling resumed and I was smothered with bear hugs. "Yey! I'm going to be a big brother!" I winced at his shout. His head was situated beside my ear making his voice too loud for my liking.

"What the hell did the Dobe tell you?" Dobe knows this kid? He probably left him here last night. Stupid dobe!

"Tou-san! You said a bad word!" He looked at me with a serious look on his face. "I can't make you go to your room because we're already here," he looked behind him shook his head and smiled. "Momma didn't hear you so it's alright, we, the dominant male population should bond together against the evils of girls and cooties!" He smiled impishly and hugged me again. He sounded so mature and so childish at the same time. I like this kid. "But Momma isn't evil, she loves me!" He nodded for emphasis before he continued with his rather enthusiastic rant. "I was really good at Uncle Naru's! I took care of Aunt Hina and the baby in her tummy!" He looked thoughtful and then continued curiously, "Why did Aunt Hina eat her baby Tou-san? Was she that hungry?" He stood up suddenly and whimpered. What is wrong with him? "Tou-san! Don't make Momma hungry! I don't want her to EAT me!" He whined rather loudly. I chuckled at his logic.

So Hinata is pregnant? The Dobe finally made his move? Or rather, Hinata finally made her move on him. I was asleep that long? No, that's ridiculous. I just saw her yesterday and she was far from pregnant.

"Where is your mother?" I have to return him to her. It wouldn't do well for me if I bring a toddler along in class.

I need to find Sakz and talk to her before the day ends; she was rather pissed at what transpired at the Quad yesterday.

"I dunno! I had just arrived and went straight here," he got down from the bed and he stumbled. I stood up and caught him before he fell down. He laughed and pointed at me. "Tou-san you're nekkidddd!" I looked down and noted that he was correct.

I looked around and found my boxers below the bedside table. How the hell did it get there? I put it on and looked around the room. There were clothes thrown around. Fuck! I DID do something with somebody last night!

"Kiseki, is that you baby?" A female voice called out.

"Momma!" The toddler grinned and ran outside. Does he ever get tired?

"Momma! Momma! Momma! MOMMMAAAA!" His shouts were heard all over the first floor of the mansion.

I followed him smiling at his antics. He was a very hyperactive child. I pity his father. He surely is a handful. I could just picture out early wake up calls, walks to the park and numerous scraped knees.

The toddler stopped in the entrance of the kitchen. I was a few feet away from him when he shouted at the top of his tiny lungs.

"ONIGIRIIII!" Instead of getting annoyed with his loudness, I chuckled.

"Hush Kiseki. Do you want to wake your grandpa?" A voice, presumably the mother of the child, admonished gently. "He seldom visits here as it is. You don't want him to get mad, do you?" She whispered playfully. "Now come here and help Mom make breakfast!"

"Yey!" He looked back at me before he ran to his mom. "Momma, I caught Tou-san naked and he said a bad word!" I laughed, so much for male bonding against the evils of the opposite sex.

"I thought we weren't telling your mother, you little snitch," I went in the kitchen wearing an amused expression. I have to tell his mother not to let her son loose so early in the morning.

When I entered the kitchen I got the surprise of my life.

"Sasucakes? Are you alright?" An older version of Sakz was there, moving around the kitchen like she owned the place. I stood immobile in the kitchen entrance. When I didn't answer her query she stopped chopping the tomatoes and glanced at me again.

The toddler was reaching for the knife she was holding. She looked down and ruffled the kid's raven locks. "Now, now Kiseki. What did mom say about little children and sharp pointy things?"

The toddler pouted and huffed, crossing his arms in the process. "That they shouldn't be friends til they get older," he unwillingly stated. "But Momma, I wanna help you!" Sakz smiled and carried the child and placed him on the counter. She kissed his forehead and the child giggled. "I love you Momma!" She laughed merrily and said 'Love you more, baby boy' back at him. She placed him on the floor again and the kid ran towards the kitchen exit. He stopped right in front of me and hugged my leg. "Love you too, Tou-san!" That and he sprinted towards the garden.

Sakz turned towards me and smiled. "What's wrong Sasucakes? Are you alright?" I still couldn't talk. She walked towards me and stood right in front of me. I looked down on her and she smiled _my _smile. I smiled back.

She put her hands on my neck and stood on her toes. Before I could ask her what she was doing and what was going on, she placed a soft gentle kiss on my lips. My eyes widened. Her fingers curled themselves in my hair and I felt goose bumps appearing on my skin. She must have felt it on my nape because I felt her smile into the kiss. I closed my eyes and gave in. It felt rather good having her close. I held her face with one hand and placed the other one on the small of her back pulling her towards me as close as possible. She gasped when she felt me slowly harden and I used the advantage to deepen the kiss more. If I had known that kissing her would feel like this, I would have done it a long time ago. She moaned in my mouth before she pulled back.

"Good morning," she rasped. She let go of me and turned back to what she was doing like nothing happened, like she didn't just turn my world upside down with that kiss. My nape was still tingling with the feel of her fingers. "Get dressed, breakfast will be ready soon."

"Huh?" I feel unreasonably dumb today. It's like my brain ceased to function.

"Your mother will have your head if you come to the dining table in nothing but your boxers," she looked behind me and snickered. "You're undeniably hot shirtless and I want nothing more than to do naughty things to you right now but you're kind of giving a free show to the mansion staff," I cannot believe she just said that! If I was 80% turned on with our kiss, I'd say I'm a hundred and ten percent turned on now. "Now go back to our room and get dressed. Or do you want your son to eat all of this onigiri by himself?"

I awoke with a groan. I'm dreaming of her again. I've had countless dreams about her since we were younger. This was the first time that a child was involved. It was just usually me and her doing all sorts of stuff, from doing homework together to lazing at the beach that she loved so much.

I closed my eyes and sighed. At least its not one of _those _dreams. I've had a number of not so wholesome dreams about her in the past. I would wake up sweating and I'd have to take a freezing shower in the middle of the night. I can't even get myself to touch her anywhere else but her elbows lest I embarrass myself.

When we were younger, she would latch on to my arm as much as possible. She'd hug me when she has the chance and she'd let me sleep on her lap when I get sleepy. I never used to have this annoying feeling towards her. It all started when she stopped hanging around me. It happened at about the same time I first had sex with Karin. She'd distance herself from me. The closest thing to those touches that she'd give me was to playfully hit my arm or the gentle cradling of my face when I'm troubled.

The first time I had the troubling dream, I was scandalized. I never thought I'd have those kinds of thoughts about her. We're friends! I can't just be her friend during day and fantasize about her when sleep comes! It would be like betraying her trust without her knowing. In retaliation to my dreams, I had sex with Karin as much as I can, which resulted to my addiction to her and said activity, which almost ruined my relationship with Sakz when the redhead cheated on me and the bulk of my anger was directed towards the pinkette.

I've tried making Sakz jealous countless times but she didn't show any indication of feeling such. She'd just shrug it off and continue whatever it is that she is doing, acting apathetic and then scold me for being a "polygamous chauvinistic pig".

I decided not to act on the troubling _thing _I had with her. It's better if we just stayed friends. I'm not sure if I'm capable of being a good boyfriend to her. I don't think I'd make her happy. And I don't think I could bear it if ever, by chance, we break up and end up hating each other. Love does that to people. Make them extremely happy then crush their world the next. That's why I don't want to entertain thoughts of love. I need her in my life and just because I have this unhealthy lust issues with her, doesn't mean that I've fallen in love with her. She deserves a person who is totally in love with her. She deserves someone better. No, she deserves the best.

Plus, I don't think I can stop myself from doing _stuff _with her if we were actually _together_. I'd ruin her dream of waiting til she gets married before actually doing _it _with somebody. What if after we actually _do it _I'd lose this _feeling? _What if I'm just lusting after her because I know she'll never give in? I'd end up tainting her purity if I do get her to agree and the guilt would kill me.

She'd kill me too if she knew how I get turned on when she'd so much as sit near me. As time passed, I got used to the feeling. This resulted to a rather troublesome (as Nara pointed out) effect. I'd go extremely pissed when she's with another male. I can't have them thinking about the things _I _think about when I'm near her. It went on okay for the past years; Sakz would just laugh at me every time and then carry on. But what happened yesterday took a wrong turn. It was the first time I had actually hit somebody. I'm not surprised though since it was the first time I saw her cry like that. I've seen her cry before but not like yesterday. It felt as though she was too tired and she wanted to give up on everything. She's a very optimistic person and seeing her like that was just too much.

What am I going to do now? I had just single-handedly ruined our friendship.

I looked at the clock beside my bed. It was still twelve midnight. I doubt I'd be able to sleep with all these thoughts. I sighed and stood. I took the photo album Mother placed on my desk. I opened the first page and smiled at the first photo.

It was of me and Sakz during Uncle Madara's wedding. She was wearing the pink dress Mother gave her. On her feet were the black and pink Chucks that I gave her on her fourteenth birthday. I was wearing a tux and the male version of the shoes she was wearing. We were on the beach and I was giving her a piggy back ride. She was pointing at something while she laughed. I had a small smile on my face. At that time, we had no idea that Mother was taking the picture.

I can still remember that day. When we went home, I had told her about Karin's unusual effort to latch herself to me. The next day, she started ignoring me. This resulted to me and Karin hanging out more often and the rest was history.

I touched the photograph and sighed. What am I going to do with you Sakz?

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This was a little hard to write. *_*

Review pls! (^_^)


	15. ambivalence

Welcome to chapter 15! My longest chapter up to date. ^_^

There are some lines here that might confuse you for it hasn't been mentioned yet in the previous chapters. It will be in future chapters though.

This chap is all about Saku's confusion and her love-hate, (assumed) one-sided relationship with Sasu.

EndlessFlame911: I had a hard time gaining access in my account too! I already had this chap ready the other day but I couldn't log in to my account. Gaara makes his appearance in the present time line here. ~.^

Super temerity and Dobe would be hilarious to see! lol

p.s. I have a lot of unspecific dialogues here. But almost all of them were made by Sasuke, except in the first part, which had Naru, Saku and Sasu talking with each other. And the second flashback, which happened in the previous chaps. Hope you won't get confused.

xiamesee: I got a little confused when I read the first part of your review.

I went "Oh so that's why she said it like that" when I finished reading it. *-*

Thank you so much for taking time to review.

Ayane of the night: I agree with you. He is STILL kind of an idiot. He's an adorable idiot though if I think about it. He's an adorable SCARED idiot.

illneverknow: I kind of found the previous chap hard to write (except the part about Sasu and Saku's son being cute) and thought it didn't come out as read-worthy as the other ones. But since you liked it, I guess it went out fine. ^_^

Thank you for sticking around!

woodbyne: As requested, this is the continuation of my sneaky-ninja-ending from chapter 12. Hope this satisfies your curiosity. ^_^

Don't worry, Gaara won't be alone in this story. Like you said, he's too hot to be alone. I couldn't do that to him. I want him to have his own somebody so he'll have lots of kids to pass his 'hotness' genes to.

You're review made me smile my big stupid smile again! Especially when you mentioned how you liked Kiseki. That part was really fun to write!

Sasu's ignorance sure gives him lots of headaches! I love giving him headaches!lol. I don't know if the angst in this chap would fill your meter (the angst moments here is kinda fewer than the previous chapters).

I hope you'd still enjoy it though! ^_^

Thanks to pinkpaige, k-21 and haboubeh93 for adding BttB to their alerts/faves list!

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Naruto isn't mine.

I got some of the lines Sasu says here from a song entitled 'Your Universe' by Rico Blanco, the lyrics are freakin' awesome! It's like MADE to be Sasu's song for Saku in this story (though he has yet to realize it). Go check it out! ^_^ And I don't own it, much as I want to.

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_italics: past conversations_

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**chapter 15: ambivalence**

"_Sakura-chan! We should have a momma and a daddy! All houses have mommas and daddies right?"_

"_That's a swell idea Naru!"_

"_I should be the daddy coz I'm amazing like a neenjah! You should be the momma coz you're pretty and your hair is cool! I'll work in the big office and you can take care of our baby!"_

"_Stop saying nonsense Dobe. It's stupid. This game is stupid."_

"_You don't think I'm pretty Sasucakes?"_

"_TEME! You made Sakura-chan cry! I'm gonna kick your pale bum!"_

…

"_Forehead?"_

Huh? I don't remember Pig being there at that time. I haven't even met her yet when that happened.

"Forehead, can you hear me?" No, I can't Pig! I wanna sleep more! "You're awake. I know you're awake. Your eyes are slowly moving underneath your eyelids!" You're rather persistent Pig! But I'm stubborn! I will not wake up! No I won't! You can't make me! "Now quit napping and open your eyes. Naruto is getting excessively restless. If you won't wake up right now he's gonna phone 911."

911? Why should he call 911? Did something happen?

I slowly opened my eyes. The first thing I saw was a tuft of blonde hair.

"SAKURA-CHAN!"

I made on oof sound but hugged him back anyway. "Naru, can't breathe!" His hold on me was pretty tight!

He was pulled away by the shirt by an amused Nej. "Naruto, you are going to make her lose consciousness the second time if you insist in constricting her airway," he smiled at me and added, "How do you feel Sakura? Do we need to call for an ambulance to take you to the hospital?" I shook my head no.

"I'm okay I guess," I looked around me. Pig was sitting beside an amused Hina, who was looking at a pouting Naru who was trying to pry Nej's fingers off his shirt. I was on an improvised hospital bed, turning sideways, I saw the school nurse's table.

I'm at the school clinic. What am I doing here? I'm more often than not slow in the head every time I wake up.

"-oughta kick his ass for-" "-pid bastard-" Naru was muttering something under his breath and pacing beside my bed. I let him do what he wanted, he'd whine if I stop him and I don't want that. I need to remember what happened before I get home.

I glanced at the wall clock, past eleven in the morning. I should be at Chemlab1 right now.

I sat up when I suddenly realized something. "CHEMISTRY! Crap! Orichimaru-sensei will have my head! I was supposed to help him transport the chemicals today!" I was about to stand but Hina stopped me.

"It is alright Saku. The nurse already informed him. You are excused from classes for the whole day," she stood and guided the pacing Naru to sit. "She is fine Naruto-kun. Sit and be still, please? You are making me rather dizzy," I'm glad she got over her stutter-around-Naruto-kun-then-pass-out-phase. It was funny how Naru freaks out every time but there were times wherein no one could catch her when she falls; it's hard to laugh out when your friend gets hurt. She only blushes from time to time now. Being last year's Tae Kwon Do champion gave a boost to her self confidence.

I smiled when Naru pouted but followed her instruction. They really look nice together. Naru is rather dense sometimes; he needs someone like Hina when I'm not around to punch common sense into his rather thick head.

"Should I retrieve your belongings from Uchiha's room?" Nej's question woke me up from my musings. Voices flashed at the back of my mind.

"_I'm not sure which one I should keep for the week. You choose for me."_

"_Good morning hot stuff. How have you been?" "When we woke up, you weren't there."_

_" Sakz, look at me when I'm talking to you," _

_"I love you Sai."_

_"I did not do this to her Uchiha-san, you did."_

_"Just admit that you are in love with her already, your confession is due more than a decade ago."_

"_I don't love her; I mean how could I love her? You have got to be joking!"_

_"You were never really healthy for me Sasuke. Goodbye."_

I remember now. I fainted after the love-of-my-life-freaking-farewell-speech, right after I punched the said love of my life's flawless face and kicked his toned stomach. Oh my god, what did I just do? He'll hate me more now! If before he finds me a repulsive female not worth his time and love, then now I'm most probably a repulsive _violent_ female not worth his time and love!

I lied down again and stared at the ceiling. Against my will, tears swelled in my eyes. So much for my stupid _vow_, I didn't even last a day. Well, at least I'm not crying in front of him.

What am I saying? I am the SUPREME example of a pathetic love struck person with a severe case of unrequited love. I hate myself.

When my tears finally fell from my eyes, I heard numerous sighs around me.

"I know I'm acting like a pathetic rag doll but I just got to let this all out okay? My brothers are home and I don't have the strength to drive my bike later," Pig stood up from her chair and sat on my bed.

She sighed before she spoke, "Forehead, I don't want to start a lecture because you won't listen anyway," she sighed again and looked at the window, "I can't count the number of times this had happened before," she looked back at me and sighed again. "You said it yourself this time, he's not healthy for you, he does nothing but hurt you," I hate it when she does this. It makes me feel more pathetic. It's like she pities me or something. I don't need this right now. "If I were you, I'd forget him."

I sat up and glared at her. "You think I don't know that? I'm the one who feels it! Don't act like you know it better than I do!" I heard Naru whisper 'Sakura-chan' from his chair. I am so fucking tired of this! "No one has the right to tell me what to do, I'm the only one getting all the hurt this stupid situation gives so don't think that just because your relationship with lazy boy is going smoothly, you can give me advice on how to handle my 'non-relationship' with that bastard!" I heard somebody gasp at my words. Ino looked at me pointedly before she stood up.

"Neji, please get Forehead's things from Uchiha's dorm room," she turned to Naru and Hina who had covered her mouth with her hand. She must have been the one who gasped a while ago. "Naruto, take Forehead home and Hina please accompany him. I don't want him freaking out all of a sudden," he turned towards the door and spoke before she went out with her back facing us. "See you tomorrow Forehead. And a word of advice, displace your anger on inanimate objects," she turned and gave me a sad smile. "They have no feelings so you'd be sure they'd never get hurt," she closed the door slowly after that.

I stared at the door. What the hell did I just DO! I'm such a bitch! Not only did I hurt the love of my life physically, but I had to hurt my best friend emotionally too! How could I DO that all in one day? I hate myself! I always end up hurting my special people!

I covered my face with my hands. "Am I such a bad bitch?" I asked no one in particular.

"Of course not Sakura-chan," it was Naru who answered me. I removed my hands from my face and smiled at him. At least I still have him on my side. "You're not a bad bitch; you're a pretty bitch with cool hair," I tried my best to hold in the laughter that wanted to get out of my mouth. So much for being on my side!

"Naruto-kun!" Hina was scandalized. I couldn't hold it in. I laughed hard. Naru looked innocently at a glowering Hina.

"What? It's true Hina-chan! She IS pretty and her hair IS cool!" Oh my God Naru! You are priceless! Nej was chuckling along with my laughter.

* * *

I used to love it when my brothers come home. Dinner becomes lively and we'd laugh our hearts out with funny stories. But tonight is different. I want nothing more than to lock myself in my room and sulk. I want to cry my eyes out to get rid of the pain I feel inside.

Nagato-nii was talking animatedly, with his hands swinging around as he told us about an old man he met at the office he worked at.

"Princess," I looked up and saw Sasori-nii looking at my plate. "You aren't eating."

I smiled at him. "I ate a lot at school, I'm not hungry," he raised an eyebrow but let the topic go.

I sighed and stared at my plate. I held my spoon. I have to eat or they're going to be worried. I don't want to be burden to anybody. Nagato-nii accidentally hit my shoulder which caused the spoon I was holding to fall. "Fucking spoon!" Everyone around the table suddenly stopped talking. I stood up and was about to get the spoon when my chair tripped me. My clumsiness just HAD to torment me NOW? "Stupid fucking chair! You just had to trip me, didn't you!" I kicked it hard. "OWWW!" That hurt! Stupid chair! "I am going to burn you, you stupid chair!" I seethed pointing a finger at it.

"Haruno Sakura!" I stopped glaring at the stupid chair and faced my mom. "Ladies should never curse!" My brothers were chuckling quietly. "I never want to hear you speaking that way again young lady."

I bowed my head. "I'm sorry Kaa-chan," I got the fucking spoon and glared at it. "This is your entire fault!"

Nagato-nii laughed and messed my hair. "Our princess is growing up! She already got over talking to her dolls and is now conversing with silverware!" He laughed some more when I glared at him.

"I am pretty grown up, thank you very much!" He smiled and I stuck my tongue out at him. Everyone around our dining table laughed.

* * *

School is boring today. It was boring yesterday too. I sighed and leaned on my locker. I miss _him_. School isn't that exciting if I don't get to see _him_.

After the _fateful _Quad incident, I avoided seeing him. I don't know how if I could handle myself properly once I we meet. Seeing his picture on my bedside table tears me up inside. I had to remove it to prevent myself from crying. Seeing him personally would probably break my already broken heart more. I don't want that. I don't think I could survive another bout of emotional turmoil.

My cell phone vibrated in my bag. I took it out and looked at the screen.

**17 missed calls from Sasucakes**

I sighed for the millionth time. He's been calling me non-stop since Monday afternoon. And I've stopped myself from answering it. His first call almost made me answer it out of reflex. I used to worry so much when he calls me. It usually means he's in some sort of dilemma. When I thought about it, he only ever calls me when he needs something.

Well, he could call Tayuya or Ami or Karin or whoever it is that he's currently banging this time because I am not answering my phone! It's like he's using me or something! I never thought about it much because I thought he actually cared about me, so I should care about him too! We're friends right? Friends shouldn't hurt one another! They should help each other out! When I think about it, it was always me who always did the helping! It was me who always did the caring!

"_Sakura! What the fuck are you doing? Wake up!" "SAKURA! Snap out of it and wake the fuck up!" "Don't you dare die on me Sakz!"_

Okay, he DID save my life once or twice but that doesn't change the fact that he's hurt me countless times! I don't think he's aware of it though but STILL!

"Forehead? You're talking to yourself again," I looked up and glared at Pig.

"Shut up Pig! I wasn't talking to myself! I was just-"

"Yeah yeah yeah. Whatever. Quit explaining, I won't believe you anyway," the stupid Pig smirked at me!

I was about to hit her when Hina gasped beside me. "Oh my," both Pig and I looked at her. She was looking at somebody behind us.

I turned around to see what got her attention. I froze and suck in a quick breathe. It was _him_. He was walking in the sea of students with a girl on his arm. It was Tayuya. So he chose Tayuya then. I looked down and sighed.

Good. He didn't need me to decide who to choose then. So why did he have to make me choose last time? Did he want to hurt me? I've been entertaining this theory much lately.

He got Sai drunk so he could cheat on me. He called me unattractive and unlovable in many different words. He dates one of my closest friends. He makes me accompany him and his date numerous times. He talks about his wedding plans with me. He forgets about me and makes me walk in the rain. He shouts at me instead of the girl at fault when he got mad. When he's not around, he prevents me from having fun with my friends. He doesn't appreciate all the things I do for him.

Is he even aware of how he makes me feel? I doubt it. He usually makes moves on girls who gave him hints. I've given him _MILLIONS _of hints yet he didn't do anything. Oh right, he doesn't find me attractive. Figures. He's more into _experienced _girls. I'm just his nerdy virgin friend who's crazy about him.

Or maybe he _does_ know how I feel, and he's taking advantage of my feelings! It would explain all the favors I'd do for him, even though he doesn't ask favors much. I hate myself. Why did I let him use me like that? I had countless sleepless nights because of him! Why did it have to be ME who should listen to him? He has lots of friends but why does he talk to ME when he's troubled? Doesn't he know I hurt myself _more_ when he's hurt? That I cry _more_ than he does when he sheds tears? That I cry silently on the phone when he's telling me how the deafening silence in their mansion drives him nuts during dawn and he can't sleep?

I looked at him again. I can still feel the familiar excitement I experience each time I see him. Along with the excitement is the familiar tug at my chest. My throat hurt and my eyes started to tear up.

I turned around and walked away. With all the events that happened, why is it still so hard to accept this? He gets kicks out of hurting me. How could I have not noticed this before? If I noticed this earlier, it wouldn't have come THIS far! I wouldn't have had fallen so deep. It would have been much easier to let go.

"_Hands down, __I kind of miss hanging out with you a bit.__ No. Make it medium-sized. Okay, I miss hanging out with you big time! Happy now?"_

It would have been so easy.

"_When I'm feeling tired and afraid, how do you know just what to say to make everything all right?"_

I wouldn't have had good memories. Memories that make it harder to let go.

"_When I'm about to lose control, how do you patiently hold my hand and gently calm me down?"_

I started sobbing. I miss him! I miss him but I don't want to see him. I want to hug him then hit him at the same time. I read a line somewhere-I hate to love you and I love to hate you. This is exactly how I'm feeling right now. But I can't just stop loving him.

You can't tell a person to stop loving someone simply because; we can't UNLEARN something we've already learned to do. I've loved him all my life. It would be difficult to stop loving him now, especially if I see him almost everyday.

* * *

My room is a total mess! I huffed and fell on my bed face down. I had started _redecorating_ my room. I removed all the things that reminded me of _him_. The problem was, almost all the things in my room _reminded_ me of him. My room was full of pictures of him, dating from more than a decade ago until present. I had some of his championship shirts, which I already threw in the garbage this morning. I had his slippers with me from that time when I lost mine at the beach when we were ten and he decided that walking barefoot until we reached the parking lot was an entertaining activity. My pink boom box was also a gift from him together with the obsidian black electric guitar he got me last year. My night lights were mostly from him too. I put it in my mental note list to buy a new night light, I hate sleeping in the dark and the main light of my room hurts my eyes if I leave it on.

There was a knock on my door. "Princess, I made you a sandwich," it was Sasori-nii. I hurriedly got out of bed. I have to fix my room before he gets in! I don't want him to worry about me! Before my feet reached the floor, I got tangled in my bedspread. I almost fell on my face if not for my hands.

"I'm not hungry Aniki!" I called out and hurriedly tried to arrange my things. "Freakin' bedspread! You just HAD to trip me you stupid excuse of a cloth!" I stomped on it many times. Why does this have to happen when my brothers are home?

Tick tock… tick tock… huh? Why do I have a clock again? I threw my old one last time!

ARRGHHHHHH! "I hate you, you stupid bedspread! I hate you too, you stupid clock!" I took my worst enemy of the moment and threw it on the floor. When I looked up, I saw a framed caricature of _him _and me. I stared at it for a few seconds, I hate him. But I hate myself more. "And I freakin' hate you, you stupid excuse of a male!" I threw it beside the broken clock.

My door opened and Sasori-nii went in. Fuck! I forgot all about him!

"That wasn't so nice princess. You're too old to be spanked for tantrums," he smiled at me and I huffed.

He had a food tray with him and he placed it on my table. He looked around before he started talking.

"I would not ask you if you're okay because clearly you are not. Care to tell me about it princess?" I huffed again and crossed my arms. No way I'm gonna tell him! I'm a big girl now; I can take care of my own problems! He chuckled and ruffled my hair. I glared at him and he freaking laughed at me!

"Your glare does not scare me one bit. The only people you can torment that with is the little Uzumaki and Hana-koi's scruffy little brother," I laughed. Kiba? Scruffy? It kinda sounds like a dog's name.

"Kiba isn't scruffy Aniki," I sat down and he sat beside me on my bed. I leaned my head on his shoulder like I used to when I was younger and my Kaa-san wouldn't give me what I wanted. He usually helps me plan out how to _make _Kaa-san give whatever it was to me.

At our position, I could clearly see the broken clock and the picture frame that held the caricature. "I hate him Aniki," I sighed again. "He makes me so happy one minute then makes me hate him soooo much the next," I looked up at him. "Am I that unlovable?" He smiled a gentle smile and stood.

"Of course not princess," yeah right! I dropped myself on my bed again.

"You're just saying that cos you're my brother," I feel really lonesome. I hugged my pillow tight and sighed again.

He didn't say anything for a few minutes and he chuckled. I wonder what's so funny. If he's laughing at me he's gonna get it!

This isn't going anywhere. Every where I look, I see _him_. Almost every thing in this place reminds me of _him_. Maybe I should be away for a little while.

"Aniki, you have a house in Suna right?" I saw him nod. "You said I could visit there anytime I want right?" I could stay there after graduation which would happen in just a few weeks. I won't see _him _and Raraa and his siblings are there. I could visit their beach house anytime I want and no one will prevent me from going.

"Of course princess."

I was about to tell him my plan when Nagato-nii's shout caught my attention. Somebody was at the door.

"Pein-nii! Nagato-nii! Who's there?" It must have been one of their bitter ex girlfriends.

"It's the mailman princess!" Mailman? At this time? Sasori-nii chuckled at Nagato-nii's answer.

I laughed with him and got up from bed. I'm going to call Raraa and tell him of my plan. When I reached my dresser, something caught my eye. I took it and saw that it was one of _his _shirts. "WHAT THE HELL? Who placed that bastard's shirt back on my dresser? I placed it this morning in the garbage can! Aaaaargggghhhh!"

* * *

After class the next day, I noticed a familiar car outside the school gate. Naru was beside it and was talking rather loudly with a redhead who had his back towards me. I hid behind a tree and made sure that a certain _somebody _was out of sight. He's usually with Naru so I have to be cautious. No sign of _him_ anywhere. I got out of my hiding spot and approached Naru.

I looked at the car again. It had a symbol of some sort of an hourglass in front of it. Hourglass! Suna! I ran towards them and hugged the redhead Naru was talking to.

"Raraa!" He stumbled a few feet and chuckled. He hugged me back with one arm and pats my head with his other hand. I inhaled his smell and smiled. He really smells good! "I miss you lots Raraa!" I let go of him after I got a rather long sniff of his shirt.

Naru laughed at me. "Man Sakura-chan! I thought you already grew out of your sniffing obsession with Gaara!"

"He smells nice!" I crossed my arms when my attempt to hit him didn't succeed. He took refuge in the car.

There was an indignant "Hey you stepped on my foot!" when he got in. Then a series of "I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Let go of my ear please!" Somebody was laughing her heart out too.

"Sakura-chan! Help meeee!" I looked at Raraa in silent question.

He raised his eyebrow and smiled. "The girls tagged along as usual," he walked to the car and opened the door.

Naru went out first with a grimace. After him was a short-haired girl who still had her right hand pulling at Naru's ear. Lastly, a girl at roughly the same age as the previous one got out. She was still laughing at Naru.

When the girls noticed me, they squealed.

"Sakura-san!" They left Naru alone and took turns in hugging me.

"You girls are mean!" I laughed at Naru's pout. He looked like a big kid being denied his favorite candy.

The girl with long, brown hair answered him. "Hey, I didn't do anything Naru-chan!" She went over to where Naru stood and pinched his cheek. The girls were always fond of Naru.

Naru pouted more. "Yeah but you laughed at me Sari-chan! You should have helped me when Matsuri-chan was bullying me!" He crossed his arms and glared at Matsuri.

"Fine fine!" Matsuri went near him and I laughed at how he flinched and covered his ears. "I would say sorry but that would be a lie. You stepped on my foot and it hurt." She raised her right foot playfully. "Would you rather that I got even by stepping on your foot, too?"

Naru looked down and saw the very pointy high heels. He took a step back and shook his head. He ran towards me mouthing 'Protect me Sakura-chan!" and hid behind my back.

I was laughing so hard, I had tears in my eyes. "You guys have no idea how much I missed you."

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Sari and Matsuri are Gaara's fangirls in the Anime. They were present when Gaara was 'put to life' again by Chiyo using some of Naru's chakra. (^_^)

So how did it go guys? Review pls! ^_^


	16. welcoming committee

yo!

Sorry for the late update. I already had this chapter before I posted chapter 15, I was supposed to post it earlier but I got sick. I got woozy each time I stand, my bed and my remote control became my best buds for the entirety of my "sick leave". Hope you guys are still here reading this!

EndlessFlame911: Will you let me see your Itachi drawing? (^_^) No matter how short a review is, it would still make me smile. The length makes me smile wider though. lol. You're in chapter 3 of your gaasaku already? Yey! 2 more to go before I get to read it! Thanks for liking Kiseki! And thank you lots for finding time to review!

illneverknow: Sorry. The part wherein Saku remembered what Sasu told her in the past must have been the cause of confusion. If you read it again, just bear in mind that the words in italics (aside from the first part and the lines that were said by other characters in the previous chaps) were said by Sasu.

waaah! I adore you to bits! It would have been nice to make this story last forever but I don't think that's possible. Don't worry, there are still more chapters to come to keep you entertained. (^_^)

woodbyne: I know your wrist is healed by now coz it took me too long to update (It's better/healed right?Because if it isn't then you seriously need to go to the hospital to get it checked)

Don't go killing Sasu yet, an explanation of his action with "it" will be explained here. And Saku will kick our asses if we harm her precious Sasucakes. (^_^)

You'll get the answer to who placed the shirt back on her dresser in this chap. I truly hope your wrist is healed. It would be a shame if I don't get to hear/read your amazing reviews.

This chapter is dedicated to the three of you! You guys have been here since and are still here now. *Hugs*

Thanks to skylovers98 for adding BttB to his/her faves list!

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naruto isn't mine.

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_italics: flashback_

_**italics bold: note on paper**  
_

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**Chapter 14: welcoming committee**

**Tuesday **

FUCKITY FUCK I'M LATE! Kurenai-sensei will kill me! Scratch that! She's too kind to kill me but she WILL tell Hana-nee and being the sweet big sister that she is, she WILL tell Mom! And Mom WILL kill me! Fuck I'm dead!

I ran towards the second floor of the Sarutobi building. I need to reach S-08 within ten minutes or byebye world! I already had two detentions for being late; the third one would surely make Mom happy! Happy enough to ground me for a decade! I do not need said grounding! I'm pretty happy with my freedom, thank you very much!

I turned around a corner and bumped into somebody and fell on my butt. I glance at my wristwatch. I only had seven more minutes to go and S-08 is still two floors away. The elevator just HAD to be under maintenance when I needed it the most! Talk about bad luck!

"FUCK!" A hand was offered and I took it looking up. Uchiha Sasuke. "Yo! Listen man, I gotta go, I'm late for Psych101. See you at the grandstand later!" I was about to run when he stopped me.

"Have you seen Sakz?" I turned to look at him. His shirt was a bit crumpled and his eyes had dark circles around them.

"You look like shit man!" I touched his shirt sleeve and grimaced. I'm a bit of a slob but my shirt IS a little neater than his. "You tackled a bear before you came here?" There was something nagging at the back of my mind. What is it that I was supposed to remember about Sasuke? I usually suck at remembering things.

"Kiba," I looked beside me and Shino was already there.

"Fuck Bugman! Warn a guy next time will ya?" He always appears so suddenly that it creeps the hell out of me. We've been best friends since we were in our Moms' bellies and I still don't get how he does it!

"Uchiha," Shino turned his attention to Sasuke.

"Aburame," they stared at each other for like minutes. Their expressions changing as seconds pass.

What the hell is wrong with these two? How the hell do they manage to communicate without words?

"Hey, it's not like I'm not enjoying your little chat but I have a class to catch," I tapped Shino's shoulder and nodded at Sasuke. "I gotta go."

"Class was canceled Kiba. Kurenai-sensei went into labor and she was rushed to the hospital," I looked behind me and saw Shikamaru. He was looking at Sasuke with his usual bored expression.

"Are you sure Shikamaru? That's not one of your schemes to get out of class to snooze the day away?" Although I am a bit relieved with what he said.

"Heh, you know Shikamaru. Classes don't stop him from sleeping," as usual Choji had a bag of chips in his hand. "Yo Sasuke!"

"I did NOT do ANYTHING," he was looking at Shino and Shikamaru while he said it. Huh? What the hell is Sasuke talking about? What did he NOT do? And if he didn't do nothin', then why does he look as guilty as a guy can get?

"That's the problem, you didn't do anything and you're STILL not doing anything," Shikamaru yawned after talking. This guy is always sleepy! "If you do by chance plan on finally doing something about all this, then feel free to call us. We'll help you as much as we can, after all it's only a few weeks before graduation," he looked behind him before he continued. "Just don't come near me when the girls are around. My troublesome girlfriend is mad at you and I don't want to join in with the fireworks. We're friends yes, but I love my 'family jewels' more than you. She threatened to castrate me with a rusty knife if she sees me talking to you," he sighed and turned around. "Be seeing you," he walked away while Shino followed.

I remember now! "Sasuke you bastard, you got owned yesterday!" I laughed my ass out. "Man, I would have paid big bucks to see THAT!" I held my stomach and laughed some more. "You're not even together yet and she already had you sleeping in the doghouse!" He looked like he wanted to punch me. "Some pretty boy you are! Aren't you supposed to be good with the ladies? If I had a girl like Sakura like you do, I'd date her in a second, no hesitations whatsoever!" I slapped his shoulder. "Man, you are LAME!"

"Shut the fuck up Dogbreath!" Heh! I just love pissing this guy so much! I seldom have this opportunity so why not abuse it?

"What? It's true! Sakura is HOT! And you my friend are BLIND! BLIND I tell ya!" I stepped backwards and prepared myself for his assault. His punch didn't reach me cos I ran away. "HAH! Sucks to be you Sasuke! I doubt she'd talk to ya sometime soon!" That got him almost seething. Oh yeah! Life is good!

Chouji chuckled and put his arm on Sasuke's shoulder. "Good luck Sasuke. I hope this issue will FINALLY be resolved," he smiled at Sasuke's expression. "If you need us, just tell us okay? You'd need all the help you can get. Just don't go near Ino and Tenten. I'd say they're pretty scary right now," I looked in front of me and saw Ino.

"Chouji!" My shout was just in time for Chouji to let go of Sasuke and innocently turn around the other way. If Ino saw him talking to Pretty Boy then I'd say he's dead meat. Ino is one mean girl with a tongue as sharp as a knife when she's pissed. It doesn't help that her father trained her in martial arts too. I pity Shikamaru. He'd be a battered husband for sure!

**Wednesday**

"Sasuke?" I turned around and saw Tayuya. I do not need this right now.

"Tayuya," I removed her hand from my arm. She held my arm again, more tightly this time. "What do you want?" My headache got a notch higher. I haven't had a good night's sleep lately.

"You. I want you Sasuke," I am barely holding on the reins of my temper. I can forcibly remove her hand but that could hurt her physically.

"_It is not proper to hold a girl that way little brother," I looked up to my Aniki. I had grabbed Karin's hand a little too roughly. We were at Gaara's 9__th__ birthday party and I was not in the mood for socialization. Sakz was with the birthday boy and I was sitting all alone in a corner. I came over because she told me yesterday that she wouldn't leave me, yet she's currently laughing with Sabaku and Uzumaki while helping the redhead open his presents, leaving me in a corner to myself. I made a mental note to ask Mother for lots of presents on my birthday so Sakz could open them for me. She always loved opening presents. _

"_But Aniki, she grabbed me first!" I didn't ask her to come near me. I hate it when others grab me thinking that it would be alright. I find it rude. "My arm hurt because she held it really tight!" I looked down and saw that Karin was whimpering in pain. I let go of her hand._

"_Hn. Sakura-chan does that to Gaara-kun all the time," he's right, Sakz does that not only to Sabaku but to me, Hyuuga and Uzumaki as well. "Would you like it if Gaara-kun would grab Sakura-chan that way?" I thought about it for a second. The thought of a crying Sakz does not sit well with me. Aniki poked my forehead._

"_Itai!" I touched my forehead and glared at him. He had his eyebrow raised and waited for my answer. "Fine!" I directed my attention at Karin. "I apologize alright? I didn't mean to hurt you. Now stop crying," she stopped sniffling and hugged my Aniki. Tch! It's not like I wounded her! Karin is such a drama queen!_

"_Sasucakes! There you are! I've been looking for you!" Sakz grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the long table filled with presents. I looked back at my Aniki and he was smiling at me. Karin was pouting and glaring at Sakz."Help us open the presents! It won't be as much fun if you won't join us!" I looked at Sakz' hand on my arm and smiled. I rather liked it there. From now on, I wouldn't hurt girls intentionally. Sakz is a girl and I don't like seeing her hurt._

I glared at Tayuya's hand and started to walk. I need to find someone. She walked beside me not letting go of my arm. I tried to shrug it off but she wouldn't budge. Clingy bitch!

"Oh I see you've chosen you're flavor of the week?" Fuck! Of all the people to see me right now, it just had to be Ino. She had an overly sweet smile on her lips. "How's it going Tayuya?" The girl in question said 'hi'. My vision was focused behind the blonde. A pink-haired girl was walking briskly, about to turn at the corner of the corridor.

Fuck! I just missed her!

"Ino, I need to-," she stopped me with a wave of her hand.

"Drop it Uchiha, not today," she turned around and walked towards the direction Sakz took.

"Give her time Sasuke-san. She'll come around," Hinata smiled at me and then had her attention directed at the girl beside me. "You're father will meet with Otou-sama tonight for their new business venture. It wouldn't be well if he finds out how his _innocent_ little girl throws herself to unwilling men," Tayuya let go of my arm and glared at her. I sighed in relief. Hinata smiled innocently at Tayuya then faced me again. "Glad to be of help Sasuke-san," she bowed before she followed her two friends.

**Thursday**

It was 8 o'clock in the evening. Mother was out with Father for a charity ball hosted by the Aburame's. The twins were in the living room playing poker. I could hear their shouts and curses. What's the use of playing poker when you could clearly tell what's on your opponent's mind?

I finished the sandwich I was making. I put it in a tray together with the chocolate flavored milk. Our princess didn't join us for dinner. She was in her room sulking. I decided to feed her, lest she'll wake us up in the middle of the night with her rather loud curses in the kitchen. She was cursing a lot these past few days. Mother gave up in her lecture the second day. Princess would just apologize but the curses didn't stop. She cursed everything, from plants to plates, from chairs to walls. I found it humorous at first, but when she stopped eating I got worried.

I went upstairs and knocked on her door. "Princess, I made you a sandwich," I heard a loud thud and chuckled. She must have fallen on her bed again. She goes unbelievably clumsy once something is bothering her.

"I'm not hungry Aniki," there were shuffles and a muffled "Freakin' bedspread! You just HAD to trip me you stupid excuse of a cloth!" I heard the sound of a foot being stomped on the floor. "I hate you, you stupid bedspread! I hate you too, you stupid clock!" There was a sound of a crash; I figure I'd have to buy a new alarm clock. "And I freakin hate you, you stupid excuse of a male!" At the sound of a broken glass, I went in. She looked startled at first but then crossed her arms. I smiled at her. She looked like a child having temper tantrums.

"That wasn't so nice princess. You're too old to be spanked for tantrums," she huffed but she didn't comment. She's usually a very good daughter and sister. We never had a problem with her.

I placed the food tray on her bedside table. Her room was a mess. She is usually very tidy and a single thing out of place in her room would drive her to distraction. "I would not ask you if you're okay because clearly you are not. Care to tell me about it princess?" She huffed and crossed her arms defiantly. I chuckled and messed her hair, she glared at me and I laughed. "Your glare does not scare me one bit. The only people you can torment that with is the little Uzumaki and Hana-koi's scruffy little brother," she laughed at my description of my girlfriend's younger sibling.

"Kiba isn't scruffy Aniki," she sat down on her bed and sighed.

I sat down beside her and she leaned her head on my shoulder. She was looking at the little pieces of glass on her floor. "I hate him Aniki," she took a deep breathe and continued. "He makes me so happy one minute then makes me hate him soooo much the next," he looked up at me. "Am I that unlovable?" I smiled at her and stood.

"Of course not princess," she sighed again and flopped herself on her bed.

"You're just saying that cos you're my brother," she turned sideways and hugged her pillow.

I walked towards the shards of glass on the floor and stopped. I took the artwork under the broken frame. It was a caricature of her and the littlest Uchiha. It was very detailed and it was obvious that it took the artist a very a long time to make. It was of them on a couch, the raven was sleeping with a smile on his face and she was pointing and laughing her heart out at something in front of them. I flipped it over and saw a note.

**_Sakz,_**

**_This caricature may not be as good as the drawings that bastard boyfriend of yours makes but I spent almost a month drawing this! You better appreciate it more than his drawings! _**

**_And okay. Hands down, __I kind of miss hanging out with you a bit.__ No. Make it medium-sized. Okay, I miss hanging out with you big time! Happy now?_**

**_My pink couch misses you too! And you left your favorite pillow on it from last time. When will you stop being so careless?_**

**_Happy birthday anyway._**

**_Sasucakes_**

I chuckled at his words. It was very out of character. He even signed it as Sasucakes.

"Aniki," I focused my attention again on my little sister. "You have a house in Suna right?" I nodded. "You said I could visit there anytime I want right?"

"Of course princess," hmmnn. She must be planning to be away from home before she goes to college.

She was about to talk when we heard the door bell sounding.

**Change of POV**

"What the hell are you doing here?" Uchiha's foolish little brother is standing on our front porch.

"Nagato-san, I would like to see your little sister," he looked miserable. Hah! Serves him right!

"Give me three very good reasons why I should allow that," he took a very deep breathe. "I ain't that easy to convince little Itachi Jr."

Pein peeked from behind me. "Little Uchiha, in who's honor do we owe this visit?" Our visitor took another deep breathe. "Well?" My twin coaxed.

"Pein-nii? Nagato-nii? Who's there?" Our sister called from upstairs. Little Uchiha tried to look behind us but he couldn't see past our bodies.

"It's the mailman princess!" I shouted back.

Pein snorted and hit me upside the head. "Don't be stupid Nagato! Honestly, a mailman? Don't you think it is a bit dark for them to be delivering mails?" He looked at little Uchiha pointedly. "What is your purpose in talking with her Uchiha? I honestly don't want to hear my little sister's sobs the whole night."

"I have no intention of making her cry Pein-san. I simply want to speak with her to clear things out," he looked really desperate. I wanted to laugh at his face.

"Have you figured out what to say to her?" I glanced at Pein's face. He looked contemplative.

"Well I-," little Uchiha sighed and looked down. "I don't know what to say to her yet Pein-san. All I know is that I need to see her," he sighed again and looked up. "I HAVE to see her," he's taking desperate to a whole new level. He looked like he'd cry if we deny him.

"Alright-," My eyes widened and little Uchiha's face brightened. We can't let him off the hook that easily! Although he does look like he's suffered enough. He looked like a train-wreck. "You can talk AFTER you have figured out what to say to her," I smirked and little Uchiha's face fell. "She is rather hard to talk to these days; Mother and Sasori are the only ones who she talks with without cursing her heart out."

"Yeah! Much as I want to hear her lash out at you, I know she'll regret said lashing out," I poked his forehead like Itachi does and smiled. "I'd say welcome to the family but I doubt she'd forgive you so easily," Pein chuckled and I continued. "What took you so long little guy?"

He looked somewhat relieved at my words. "I don't know," he directed his eyes upstairs and sighed again.

"WHAT THE HELL? Who placed that bastard's shirt back on my dresser? I threw it this morning in the garbage can! Aaaaargggghhhh!" A few more profanities can be heard from upstairs after that.

My twin and I chuckled. "See what we mean little Itachi Jr.?" I made a mental note not to tell anyone that I placed the shirt there. I seriously thought that she misplaced the thing. She adored that shirt to bits and I had no idea that she had thrown it away for real.

Upon hearing my sister, the little Uchiha raised an eyebrow. "She must be talking about my MVP shirt last year," he shook his head and smiled to himself.

"You pissed her off real bad little Itachi Jr. Good luck, you're gonna need it."

**Friday**

"Are you positive about that Hatake?" He was telling me that Ibiki from Sand High expressed their academy's desire to make this weekend's team building retreat a joint activity between Konoha and Suna. I have a hunch that the owner's son, a certain redhead, had something to do with it. If the redhead will be present tomorrow, it would be humorous to watch my little brother squirm uncomfortably. Good thing I don't have appointments the next day.

Somebody had opened the door to my study. I removed my foot from the table. It must have been Mother who went in, mansion staff do not enter a room without proper announcement. "Alright. I will inform them of this conversation," I ended the call and faced my visitor. I was right, it was my mother.

She looked rather melancholic. She was arranging my already neat books in the bookshelf.

"Mother, is something bothering you?" She returned the last book to the shelf and faced me.

She shook her head and sighed. "Have I been a bad Mother Tachi-chan?"

"Of course not Mother. If you had been a bad mother, Sasuke and I would not have turned out as we are today," she smiled and approached my table. "What made you think that Mother?"

She made herself comfortable in the couch in front of my table. "Its your little brother," ah, my foolish little brother must have been acting foolish again. I nodded my head and smiled at her. She took this as a sign to continue, "He's been avoiding me. I tried to talk to him this morning but he had just said good morning and then locked himself in his room," she sighed again. "I of course got the master key and went in anyway. He was lying in his bed face down and was muttering something under his breathe, he didn't even notice me come in," so he's sulking again. Must have been the after effects of his manic Monday. "If I asked him what was wrong, he would just sigh and tell me its nothing."

"Mother, just because Sasuke is acting that way does not make you a bad mother, it just shows that my little brother is emotionally challenged," she raised an eyebrow at my explanation. "He cannot express himself well emotionally, lest of all express it to you."

"That's why I'm a bad mother. My own baby wouldn't even share his problems with me," she all but wailed. Tch! Sasuke's 'overly dramatic' quirks is truly a genetic trait. Mother is a prime example of a drama queen, just with much finesse. "I wanted to call Sakura-chan over but I could not find her number. That girl figures out your brother far better than I do. Do you have her number Tachi-chan?"

"He just does not want you to see him as weak Mother, it does not make you a bad parent, it makes him an inept teenager," she looked at me contemplatively. I hope she does not notice that I have purposely steered out topic away from her wanting to obtain little Pinky's digits. I don't want to make this easy for my foolish little brother.

"Maybe he's just shy," she stood up and smiled at me. "Thank you Tachi-chan, even if you purposely tried to make me forget my main agenda in coming here," she turned around and went for the door. Before she got out, she faced me again and smiled. "I don't know what you are up to but it makes me curious. I'll just get Sakura-chan's number from my other baby boy then," she waved before she left.

I smiled to myself. I can never get away with anything when it comes to our mother. She knows us too well.

**Change of POV**

I knocked on the door before I entered. On the bed was a number of blankets and pillows covering a lump in the middle. The lump was still muttering to himself. I smiled. The lump may be a little stubborn but I love him with all my heart. I don't like to see him like this.

"Sasu-chan? Are you still sulking baby boy?" There was a grunt coming from the heaps of blankets and pillows. I smiled. He gets a little uncomfortable when I call him 'baby boy'. I went inside and sat on the bed.

"Mother. I am not sulking," my baby boy sounds affronted. "I am merely trying to sleep."

Trying to sleep huh? "You've been trying to sleep since this morning?" He didn't even attend class. "What about your classes? Does your father know about this?"

The blankets moved and my baby boy's head peeked out. "Mother. I know you would not tell him. You don't like seeing Father lecturing me. Whatever it is that you are planning, it won't work. I am fine. There is nothing wrong. There is no need to worry." He got me. How can I get him to tell me what is bothering him? I have no choice.

It's time to use my secret weapon. "Alright then," I touched his face and messed his already messy hair. My baby Sasu-chan is so cute! "Would you be kind enough and give me Sakura-chan's phone number? I have something to discuss with her."

He sat up the bed and frowned at me. I knew it! It has something to do with my future daughter in law! If it was about something else, Sakura-chan would have been here already. She would have been the one comforting my baby boy. She was the only one, aside from me of course, who could put a sincere smile to Sasu-chan's face. Did they break up? I am certain that it is baby Sasu-chan's fault, Sakura-chan could never hurt my baby boy. She loves him that much.

"What do you want to talk to her about Mother?" He pouted. My baby boy pouted! I pinched his cheeks. He is so cute! "Mother!" I laughed and let go of his cheeks.

"I would like to ask her why I have not seen her lately? I miss her, you know. She makes you and Tachi-chan stop bickering and makes you behave," if I could have my way, Sakura-chan and Konan-chan would live here with us. Our home would be complete if they live here. They put my baby boys in line and makes them focus on important things in life. "Did you two break up? Is that why you're sulking?"

"Mother, how many times must I tell you that-"

"No, she IS your girlfriend. If you want to make your daughter-less Kaa-chan sad then by all means, deny it," I will have my way whether my boys like it or not!

His resolve wavered and he sighed. "Fine. I'll give you her number. But don't be surprised if all you will hear is her voice mail," he took my mobile phone and saved Sakura-chan's number on my phone book. He memorized her number? That's so sweet! I will never get tired of witnessing the dramas of teenage love, especially if the stars of said drama is my baby boy!

"Really? Why? Is there something wrong with her mobile phone?"

"I don't know. I've been calling her non-stop since Monday. I haven't heard her voice other than her welcome message in her voice mail," he held his face in his hands and sighed deeply. "I miss her Mother, she won't talk to me. I don't know what to do. I've tried everything," seeing him this miserable is breaking my heart. Too much drama can't be this heartbreaking!

"Sasu-chan," I hugged him. He leaned in to my embrace and hid his head on my shoulder. The last time he did this was when he was five. I wanted to carry him and rock him to sleep like I used to when he was younger.

"What will I do Mother?" He was trembling and I felt moisture slowly spreading on my shoulder. My baby boy is crying. I smiled and held him tighter.

"My baby boy is growing up," I wiped the tears that were falling from my eyes. He chuckled and held my shoulders.

"Mother, I am too old to be called your baby boy," he wiped my tears and smiled. "Don't worry, I'll get her back. And if she accepts me, I will never let her go ever again."

I wiped his tears and stood up. "Be sure to do that. I want more than a dozen grandkids, so I want you to start early."

Tachi-chan and Konan-chan are too busy with their careers to give me a grandchild, I have to get Sasu-chan and Sakura-chan together and fast! I want to be able to run and play with my grandkids. If they take their time and fail to have kids while I'm still healthy, I will not forgive them!

* * *

Whacha guys think? Think Saku should forgive him already?

review please!


	17. days

Yo!

Here with chapter 17!

There are lots of unspecific dialogues here. Those were spoken by Saku to Sasu (spoken from ages four to present, in chronological order) . I hope you guys won't get confused while reading it. (^_^)

Most of you wanted Saku to forgive Sasu already. I think I still have three chaps before that happens. Saku is hardcore and won't give in that easily! \../(^_^)\../

But she would eventually. She may be hardcore but Sasu makes her melt most of the time, so yeah. ^_^

illneneverknow: Super awesome? OMG have I told you how much you make me jump around in joy with your reviews? ^_^

I had fun writing Mikoto too. I love how she baby's her stoic sons. Itachi still retains some of his 'stoicism' when she's around but Sasu turns into a complete darling with her. He's a closet Momma's boy! ^_^

Thanks for sticking around and reviewing every chap! You've made my day again! ^.^

EndlessFlame911: Take your time, I'll be waiting right here 'til you get it done!^_^

hmmnn. I haven't read a SasoSaku before, your story would be the first one I'd have the pleasure of reading! Are there SasoSaku fics that you particularly like? I wanna read some before I get to read yours so I'll get over the 'awkwardness' of them being together. lol

You're review is 'lengthy' and I love it! ^_^ It made me check chapter 16 again while reading it. It made me smile lots too! I cracked up in the part wherein you had to go to school then continuing when you got back. lol.

It would be a long time before Mikoto could have Saku as her daughter in law though. Sasu needs a not so little push to just do what needed to be done a long time ago!

Kate Uchiha: lol. Sasori in a dress? That would be epic! Picturing him in a dress really cracked me up!

I like Mikoto too! I wanted to portray her as a cool stage mother who loves to mess with her sons once in a while.

Sasu reverts back to being a cute kid when he's sad. I love chibi Sasuke!

livelaughlovepen27 : Thanks! Having my readers actually 'say' (reviewing) that they love my story makes writing so much fun! ^_^

woodbyne: Out of everyone who reviewed (save EndlessFlame911 ) you're the only one who wanted to make Sasu suffer more. lol

I still have issues with Sasu's previous 'idiocy' too! Although its somewhat lessened to some degree.

Kiba was really fun to write. It's like writing Naru but with more crudeness added. Mikoto was fun to write too! She's my favorite parental unit (second to Minato- cos Naru's dad rocks!)

I love Nagato and Pein's 'moment' with Sasu too. I love making Sasu uncomfortable! He deserves it after all that he's done to their little sister. lol

Anyways, you'll get Sasu's reaction to my little GaaSaku moment in future chaps! ^_^

Hope you had fun in your cousin's party!

xiamesee: Really? You made up with her already right? I have little fights with my mom sometimes too. But its such a drag when we don't talk to each other. Moms tend to get a little overbearing sometimes but it doesn't erase the fact that they love us (and that we love them back)! ^_^

Hope the previous chap made you talk with your mom and make amends!

Thanks for the review guys! I adore you to bits and pieces!

* * *

_italics: flashback_

_**italics bold: voicemail**_

* * *

naruto isn't mine.

* * *

**Chapter 17: days**

Five days. It has been almost five fucking days since I last saw her. Five days of utter hell! I never realized until now that I have never been without her for this long. I never knew not seeing her could do this to me. When she was with that freakin' artist we never hang out much but we still see each other. She still answers her phone when I call. When she gave me the the freakin' silent treatment during that 'unusual Karin' episode she still goes out of her way to see me when I truly needed her. Did she always do that? Go out of her way for me?

I dialed her number again. It reached ten rings before the connection got cut off. I sighed for the millionth time and tried again.

"_**Yo! Sakura here! I can't answer my amazing phone right now. Leave a message after the beep and I'll call you back as soon as I can! BEEEEEEEEP!"**_

The message ended with her laughing. I stared at my phone. I was there when she recorded that. She was laughing at herself after she said 'beep'.

I stood and went to my couch. It was pink. The previous dark blue one was discarded a few years back.

"_Mother, why are the servants changing my couch?" No one from the mansion staff would answer me when I asked them._

"_Sasu-chan! You're home! I missed you baby boy!" Being thirteen years of age, it is decidedly embarrassing being smothered by kisses on both my cheeks courtesy of my mother but what can I do? I'm a momma's boy, not that I'd admit it out loud to anyone._

"_Sakura-chan was here a while ago," she said when she finally released me from her bone-crushing hug. "She said something about your room being too dull," she motioned towards my room. "And its dullness affects your mood." _

"_What was she doing here?" I came home late from practice. No wonder I didn't see her in the field. To think I spent thirty minutes looking for her._

"_She said that you would probably be tired and snappy when you get home, she didn't want the servants to be the victims of your rage," Gai-sensei was out on an out of town school conference. Kakashi took over. He felt extra sadistic and leveled up our drills for the day. Even Lee was exhausted after our practice. So yes, I do feel like I want to snap at people. "She made you your favorite rice balls," she smiled at me. "She placed it in your study table."_

"_Oh," what am I to say to that? I'll give her a call later to express my gratitude. She makes really good rice balls._

"_I figured that since she spends more time using the couch than you do, I'd change it to her favorite color!" She beamed at me, proud of her accomplishment._

"_Mother, her favorite color is black or anything that closely reminds her of an obsidian rock," just because her hair is pink, doesn't mean that she has to like it. _

"_Oh well! She'll still be happy once she sees it! I'll name it the amazing Sakura couch!" That and she got out of my room, leaving me with my rice balls and her Sakura couch._

I sat on the soft, pink appliance. I couldn't help but remember her laughing. It's been years since she last sat on this couch, but her favorite pillow was still here. I held the pillow close and lied down then looked up the ceiling. I've been trying to call her since the incident Monday morning. She didn't claim her things in my dorm that afternoon. Instead, she got Hyuuga to do it. I sighed again and closed my eyes. I couldn't stop memories of her from flashing in my mind.

"_Sas'cakes! When we gwow up I want to be a pwincess. Do you want to be a pwince? Can you be my pwince? Pwetty pwetty, pwetty pwease?"_

"_We'd be togethew fowevew and evew Sas'cakes! Pwomise me you'd nevew weave me even when we weach a hundwed yeaws owd!"_

"_Can I live here in your room? I'll never leave you? Tachi-nii said that your parents are gonna go somewhere again. I already asked my mom if I could stay here. She said that I was too young to live with a boy. Once I'm old enough, can I live here with you?"_

"_Sasucakes stop playing in the rain! You'll get sick!"_

"_Sasucakes? Did you find my surprise? I made that for you!"_

"_What's wrong Sasucakes? Are you okay?"_

"_Sasucakes I'm sorry."_

___"I feel lonely. I need a hug! Can I hug you Sasucakes?"_  


"_Sasucakes where are you? I'm coming over."_

"_You should smile more Sasucakes. I've never seen you smile at me before. Well, you smile sometimes but it's not for me."_

"_Has anyone ever told you that your eyes look shiny Sasucakes? It's like obsidian stone, only better because it shines more when you show emotion."_

"_What do you mean you didn't mean it? You can't just tell a girl to change because she looks stupid and then get away with it! What's wrong with what I'm wearing? Ino-Pig and Kiba say that I look sexy in it?"_

"_Why do you love to torture me Sasucakes?"_

"_Do you really like Karin that much Sasucakes?"_

"_Don't worry, you'll get over her."_

"_Sasucakes what do you think? Do I look good in this or the other one?"_

"_Don't worry, you won't get lonely. Unlike them, I'd NEVER leave you!"_

"_Sasucakes you jerk! I told you not to mention your sexcapades again! It's gross!"_

"_Do you even know why I'm crying or who I'm crying for?"_

"_I may deserve someone better but for me he's better than the best. It just sucks that he doesn't get it though."_

"_I hate you Sasuke."_

"_You were never really healthy for me Sasuke. Goodbye."_

FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!

"Teme! Are you ready to go?" Is that the Dobe?

"What are you doing here Dobe?" I opened my eyes and stood up, clutching the faded red pillow in my left hand.

"I told you I'd pick you up for the 'youthfulness' retreat remember?" He huffed. I gave him a blank look. I thought him and the girls were keen on ignoring me? The guys were either sleeping or laughing/smirking at my misery. Guess the Dobe cracked; he really couldn't stand it when someone in the group is left out. "I told you yesterday!" Who cares about the stupid retreat! "I sent you dozens of SMS Teme!"

"I'm not going," I need time to think of what I should do. This situation is slowly but surely driving me crazy.

"What? I drove all the way here and you're telling me you're not going? You shoulda told me yesterday bastard!" He is shouting again. If my mother hears him and wakes up I am going to kick his ass!

His phone rang and he answered it.

"Sakura-chan!" He listened for a few seconds, "Yes I'm going," he looked at me and stuck his tongue out. "No, he's being a bastard as usual," real mature Dobe! Really Mature! "No he won't. Sure I'm sure! He told me himself!" I walked towards him, maybe he'd let me talk to her. "Alrighty then! Tell him to drive carefully okay? See you there! Bye!" He closed his phone at faced me.

"I gotta go Teme. If you want to be a bastard and stay cooped up in your boring room with your pink couch and Sakura-chan's favorite pillow, then fine!" I hadn't noticed that I was still clutching the pillow. Stupid Dobe. "Stay here and rot! We are going to have lots and lots of fun! Suna High's athletes will be there too!" He pumped his fist and grinned at me. "You are gonna miss one half of your life Teme!" He walked away whistling a tune from a cartoon show.

Suna High? Shit!

"_Hey isn't that Gaara Babe?" Sakz looked at the direction Karin was pointing to._

"_What? Where Karin?" She looked at the redhead accusingly. "Are you making fun of me again?" She huffed and crinkled her nose. She looks like a little kid when she does that. It's kind of endearing, I would never tell that to anyone though. They'd think I'm a sap._

"_You know what; I still find it weird why you call her babe, Karin. It's like she's your girlfriend or something," Dogbreath just had to mention that again. Well it's his funeral._

"_What the hell are you talking about Dogbreath?" Sakz was glaring at him with her fists clenched. _ _Kiba paled upon seeing Sakz' expression. She is rather scary when she wants to be. The last time she got pissed at him, he landed in the emergency room. _

_"Nothin'! Just sayin'! Didn't mean nothing!" Everyone around us chuckled._

"_Sakura-chan!" All of us turned to look at the person who called her. It was Sabaku Temari, Aburame's girlfriend._

"_Tem!" The pinkette gave her shopping bags to Kiba and hugged the blonde. _

_"Are you alone? Is Raraa here?" Why does she even like that redhead? He's a bastard and he rarely talks like a human being. He thinks he's so high and mighty just because his father owns more than half of Suna's businesses. Tch! The Uchiha Empire is much larger than theirs! "I miss him already! I haven't seen him like forever!"_

"_Hey shortie!" The loud greeting announced the arrival of another Sabaku._

"_Kanky! I missed you!" She tried to hug him but she was stopped by Temari._

"_No can do, wrong Sabaku brother Sakura-chan," she laughed and turned Sakz around. Behind her was the redhead. He was holding something pink and fluffy._

"_Sakzie," he was raising the stuffed animal towards her. I hate him. _

"_RARAA! I MISSED YOU!" The pinkette mentioned rather loudly. She then proceeded to hug him from behind, her hands intertwined in front of his stomach. Tch! She was smelling his back. She has this weird fondness to his smell. Why does she have to do that? It's a little bit disturbing. There's no telling of what the redhead might be thinking!  
_

_"Why do you have to smell soooo good? I haven't smelled you in ages!" A vein in my temple throbbed. What is she doing? I wanted to pull her away but when I moved towards them Karin tightened her hold on my arm._

"_Gaara! I see you still have her attention," Karin was smiling rather sweetly at him. He was smiling at Sakz' antics that he did not notice us earlier. Stupid redhead._

"_Uchiha, Karin." He nodded at us and held on Sakz' arm. He pulled her beside him and put his arm on her shoulder. I glared at his arm. He smirked at me before he turned his attention at Kiba, "Inuzuka, what time is your best friend coming over? I need to ask him if he will be able to return my sister home before midnight," Sakz was tiptoeing and attempting to smell his neck, she was too short to reach it though. What is she doing? And the stupid redhead seems like he's enjoying the attention!_

"_You know what? You kinda sound like my brothers. Chill okay? Shino always returns her home on time right?" She gave up on the neck-smelling and settled for his shirt. My hands were itching to get her away from him. She had always been touchy-freely with him since we were kids and I've always hated it when she touches him. It makes me want to hit that smirk he has on his face whenever Sakz latches on to him._

"_Sakz," I made sure that there was a warning in my tone. If she doesn't stop I am going to drag her away from him. Is she turning into those bimbos that always follow me around? Doesn't she know what goes on in guys' minds when girls touch them a little too much?_

"_Sasu, let her be," I looked down at Karin's words. "Gaara does smell good. He kinda smells like you," she whispered. "I like smelling him too, right Babe?" She said it loudly this time._

_Sakz laughed and turned to us. "Yeah right! You not only smell him Karin! You grope him a lot too!" Her accusation was laced with amusement.  
_

"_Well what can I say? He's one hot dude!" Karin winked at Sakz and that made the pinkette shake her head._

"_You are such a horny thing sometimes Karin," and she laughed some more and looked up at the male beside her, "You don't mind, do you? If a girlfriend would get mad just tell me okay? I'll try and stop myself from smelling you," and she beamed at him. She freaking beamed at him! What is wrong with her? Is she flirting with him or something!_

_The stuffed animal caught her attention. "What's that? You have a date?" Her voice was teasing._

"_No it's for you. Tem was in the toy store when I saw this," he gave the pink fluffy object to Sakz. "I then remembered you so I bought it," as expected she was ecstatic. She always goes high when she receives gifts. _

"_I knew there was a reason why I like you so much! Thanks Raraa!" She hugged his torso. I've said it once, and I'll say it a million times more, I hate him. Stupid redhead._

_I was about to leave the place when we heard a loud laugh. The Dobe had arrived with the others._

"_Gaara buddy!" The Dobe then started a meaningless conversation. I drowned out whatever they were saying. _

* * *

_Sakz was still beside the redhead when we were in the Sabakus' mini bus. She was babbling about school and the redhead was nodding once in a while with a small smile. I don't understand why she likes being near him. Stupid bastard. If not for him, I wouldn't even be here. He just had to invite the pinkette to their property. Sakz just had to insist that we go to his beach house. Saying she NEEDS the beach or she'll die. I didn't believe her but I couldn't for the life of me refuse her when she's being all happy and stuff. _

_She has this trait when she's enjoying herself. She forgets everything and eventually hurts herself. I have long given up in reminding her to take care of herself and opted to do the task. She obviously lacks the need of self preservation basing on the times she inflicted cuts and bruises on her own body. Tch! Being so careless! She has this annoying trait of worrying about me when she should be worried about herself too. _

_When we arrived at the beach, she immediately dashes towards the water shouting "HELL YEAH!" to the top of her lungs. I chuckled at her antics and continued watching her. _

_The others were talking amongst themselves in the cottage. Karin was sitting beside the youngest Sabaku. She was rather content sitting there with the other redhead. I ignored them in favor of watching Sakz. The pinkette is less of an eyesore than those two. I find it useless reminding Karin that I'm her boyfriend, not the other redhead. Tch! She'll probably insinuate that I'm insecure of Sabaku if I mention it. I am not in any way threatened by him!_

_When I turned my sights on the water I didn't get to see any trace of pink. I stood up from the sand and looked again, still no sign of her. Where the hell is she?_

"_Dobe, have you seen Sakz?" Maybe she went to the cottage without me noticing. Just before I got the answer I saw her floating not twenty meters away. I sighed in relief. When she swims, she likes to stare at the sky while floating. Wait a minute! She's upside down and she's not moving! _

_"FUCK!" I ran towards the water and swam towards her. _

_Let her be okay, let her be okay!_

_When I got her to the shore I immediately did CPR. I heard voices around me but they were blurry. It felt like the only people there were just the two of us._

"_Fuck Sakura, wake the fuck up!" I pumped her chest and introduced air to her mouth while covering her nose. She still wasn't showing any signs of recovery. "Sakura! What the fuck are you doing? Wake up!" I repeated the cycle again. "SAKURA! Snap out of it and wake the fuck up!" I put in more effort into what I was doing. "Don't you dare die on me Sakz!" I did the cycle three times before she coughed water out. "Fuck are you alright?" My hands were shaking and I didn't know whether to hug her for being okay or kick her for being so careless. She knew that the area she was swimming in was much deeper yet she still went there! She just ran twenty laps in the field before we went here but did she even think of how tired her legs were? No she didn't! She just HAD to be so fucking careless! _

"_Sasucakes?*cough-cough* What's wrong?*cough* Are you okay?" What the hell is she talking about? I'm the one who's supposed to ask her that! "Why are you crying? You're all red. What happened?" She held my face gently and she looked worried. Fuck! She was worried about my skin color when she almost died! Is she freaking mental! "I'm tired *cough* I wanna go to bed," she tried to stand so I carried her. _

_When I stood up, that's when I noticed the others crowding us._

"_Teme what happened?" The Dobe looked close to panic._

"_It's alright. I'll take her to bed. She needs to rest," I glared at Sabaku as I passed him. This is his entire fault! If he didn't invite her to this stupid place, she wouldn't have had to suffer this!_

Shit! Sabaku is going to be there!

Where was the retreat held again?

"Dobe! Hold on a sec!"

**Change of POV**

I tapped the steering wheel while waiting for Sakzie to finish her conversation on her mobile phone. I heard sighs behind me so I turned around. The two girls who tagged along wore expressions of excitement in varying degrees.

"Is she talking to Sasuke-san, Gaa-nii?" Sari, my younger cousin is very fond of Uchiha, going as far as tagging along with us every time we visit Konoha. "Is he going to the retreat too?" She was all but jumping in her seat. "Can you introduce me to him this time?" I highly doubt that. Uchiha and I never had a proper conversation since we reached ten years of age.

"Oh shut it Sari! What do you like in that jerk?" Matsuri, her best friend since they were in their diapers, elbowed her while talking. "He doesn't talk and when he does, he directs insults at Gaa-chan!"

"Duh! He acts EXACTLY like Gaa-nii!" Sari crossed her arms and pouted. "That's why I like him! They are so alike in personality, they're practically twins separated from birth!"

Matsuri was enraged. "Don't you dare say that! Gaa-chan is not in any way similar to him! That Uchiha is a jerk while Gaa-chan is amazing!"

They started shouting at each other. I'll get back at Kankuro later for getting me to drive these two. They give me headaches with their squabbles most of the time. I tuned them out and looked outside. Sakzie was walking towards my car.

She looked different. Tem and Ino-san insisted that she needed a 'fantabulous ultra-mega make over', whatever that means. They said something about making a bastard realize his stupid mistake via appearance change. I did not agree with them. If a person is special, he/she would always be special no matter how he/she looks.

I was their designated driver the day before so I got to see Sakzie squirm and heard her complaints which the two blonds ignored completely. She was looking at me, eyes begging the whole time, to get her away from the blond psychos. I had attempted to do just that, but our efforts were thwarted. Those two blonds were close to invincible when they team up.

Her pink tresses were cut at shoulder length and she was wearing an ensemble she wouldn't normally wear. She caught my eye and smiled at me. Her eyes were shimmering. The best job the two blonds did on her was the removal of her lenses, opting to have her wear contacts instead. Her expressive jade orbs were bare for the world to see.

"Ready Raraa?" She said as she got comfortable in the passenger seat. "Naru said to drive carefully," she was putting on her seat belt while turning to our two companions. "You girls ready?"

"HELL YEAH!" Was the enthusiastic response.

After a short prayer to keep our trip safe, I got the roof of the convertible down and started driving. Sakzie always loved to travel with the wind blowing her hair.

"Thanks for driving me Raraa," she was looking at her hands on her lap while talking. I can tell that something is bothering her. She and Uchiha must have been having problems. She usually rides with him when we go out of town.

"What happened to Arachnid?" She was talking about my favorite car, a sleek black Spider. "Not that I'm complaining about this 635d convertible but you always favored Ferrari than BMW right?" This is one of the many things I like about Sakzie. She loves cars more than a normal girl should. She even named my cars for me. "She's new, I gotta find a suitable name for her," she contemplated for a while. I could hear Sari and Matsuri arguing over something mundane behind us.

I just smiled and waited for Sakzie to continue. "I know! I'll name her Eyeshadow!" She grinned and patted the dashboard. "Hi Eyeshadow!"

"Eyeshadow?" I find it weird naming one of my cars from a cosmetic.

"Yeah! Its gray!" She exclaimed as if that alone explains it all. She has a unique way of viewing things, I had long given up in trying to figure her out. I just nodded, it would be better to agree with her when I'm driving. She's prone to nagging if you disagree with her. "You're patronizing me Raraa!" The accusation was evident.

"Alright. Why Eyeshadow ? There are a number of gray inanimate objects. Out of all of those, why name my car after a cosmetic?"

She smiled triumphantly. She was always proud that she could make me talk 'like a normal person' should.

"I wanted to name it Ash but that title already belongs to your gorgeous gray Aston Martin," she smiled at me and continued, "you don't like the name? I could name her Lipstick?" She grinned.

"No, Eyeshadow is fine," agreeing would be better. Her names get more and more absurd as time passes. She laughed for a good three minutes before she got all quiet.

She sighed and directed her gaze at the trees that we were passing by. "Raraa?" Something in her tone confirms my suspicion. The insecurity is evident. She goes unbelievably insecure when Uchiha does or says something foolish to her.

"Hm?" If I could have it my way, Uchiha will not have a chance of talking to her like that. He wouldn't even have the chance of being in the same room with her. I would not allow him to breathe the same air as Sakzie. She's my lifeline and she makes me sane, washing away my hurt with her laughter and carefree words.

Uchiha always had a scathing effect on her. But she endures it all in stride.

_"Raraa?" I looked behind me and saw a teary-eyed pinkette. She was clutching her red dress while looking at the floor. _

_It was their prom night and I had to accompany Tem to Konoha High, its not that I don't trust her, its Aburame that I'm worried about._

_I held Sakzie's chin and raised it gently so she could face me. "What did he do this time?" There would come a time wherein I would seriously hurt that raven for doing all the things he does to the pinkette._

_"Huh?" She wrinkled her nose and tilted her head sidewards. All traces of hurt replaced by that of confusion. _

_I chuckled. She changes her mood faster than a bullet sometimes._

_I cradled her face and smiled. "What did Uchiha do this time?" The hurt on her expression came back and I almost hit my own head for mentioning the cause of her pain._

_"Do I look alright?" She looked and sounded extremely insecure and I wanted to hit Uchiha in the face right then and there. "Sasucakes said I looked stupid," she teared up more. I embraced her and let her cry on my chest. "I don't understand him at all! Ino said I looked sexy and regal. I thought that maybe boys don't like the way I look but Kiba and Naru said I looked more than nice!" She wailed. "He really thinks I'm repulsive to look at! Am I that ugly?"  
_

_That Uchiha and his inept vocabulary when talking to Sakzie will be the death of him someday._

_"You look fine Sakzie," I heard a small 'really?' from her and smiled. "Don't mind Uchiha, he's just insecure that you are prettier than him tonight," she chuckled and got out of my hold. "You know how Pretty Boy is, when there is a person who overshadows him, he goes into PMS mode."_

_She burst into fits of laughter and I sighed in relief. Her tears never cease to twist my insides so much. I could feel my anger towards Uchiha slowly draining while watching Sakzie laugh._

"Am I that unlovable?" Her question woke me up from my recollection. "I mean, you know, as a girl? Not as a friend but as a girlfriend?" The girls in the backseat suddenly got quiet. I had always wished for them to keep quiet but right now, I never thought I'd miss their squabbles.

I did not know how to answer the question without causing self-incrimination. I feel like a criminal keeping things from her. "Why would you ask me that?" I have got to steer this topic to safer ones.

"Just wondering out loud," she smiled ruefully to herself. "I feel like a beggar sometimes," she clenched and unclenched her hands and toes. She alternated her gaze to her hands and her feet on the floor. It was obvious that she was uncomfortable with our current conversation. "I don't beg for alms in the sidewalk or anything, its like I give everything I can afford to give for a little amount of- I don't know, feeling of reciprocation maybe?" Her voice went from being overly cheerful to hardly audible. She sounded so small and breakable. "It would really be nice if my actions are appreciated too, you know? I feel like a painter, offering my masterpiece to a blind person. He just doesn't get it," her voice was slowly breaking and I couldn't stand it anymore. "Maybe we're not meant for each other," she was tearing up and her knuckles turned white, "It's hard but I need to accept it."

I slowed down our vehicle and eventually stopped and parked. Sakzie looks like she'll break down in a few moments. We might encounter an accident if I comfort her and drive at the same time.

"Sari? Can I trust you not to end our lives?" My cousin whooped and jumped.

"Hell yeah! You're the best Gaa-nii! I get to drive! Whoooohhoo!" We traded places. Sakzie and I settled in the backseat while the two girls excitedly transferred up front.

We were quiet for a few moments. Sakzie took off her footwear and proceeded to hug her knees. "I'm so pathetic!" She sighed again and kept still for about ten minutes.

I watched her mumble to herself. I heard something about a 'vow' and 'not crying for that jerk anymore'. After a few moments she straightened up and breathed in a lungful of air.

"OH MY GOD I LOVE YOUR CAR RARAA!" She has reverted back to her cheerful disposition. I sighed in relief. It seems that the awkward moment has passed. "Hey! I didn't get to smell you today! C'mere!" And I was pulled by a rather enthusiastic Sakzie. I smiled and messed her pink locks as she buried her nose in my shirt. Some things never change.

* * *

I already figured out how to end the story but I am at loss at thinking of how to proceed from here 'til then. There are lots and lots of scenarios playing in my mind right now and I don't know which one to use. *sigh*

Your reviews always help me decide which path the story should go so please please post lots of em! ^_^

Raraa is hiding something from his Sakzie. ^_^ Any guess on what he's hiding?


	18. Indecisive Confrontation

Yo!

Chapter 18 is here! I already had this numerous days ago but I feel like something is missing. I kept on editing it daily. Up until now, I still think something is missing, but I figured I kept you guys waiting long enough.

Hope you still like it though.

EndlessFlame911: I agree with Sasuke needing a big dose of jealousy, I love seeing him turn green! ^_^ Saku has glasses, remember when Sasu got pissed at Sai for taking the lenses off Saku in chapter 7? I love how you noticed the different nicknames, you're the only one who pointed it out (Saku calls almost everyone with unique names- Sasucakes, Naru, Nej, Pig, Raraa, etc.).

I do think that everyone should "hand over" Saku to Sasu, but the problem at hand right now is that Saku doesn't want to be handed over. lol. Thanks for the review! p.s. What chapter are you in your gaasaku? ^_^

confuzion: ^_^ okay. Thank you for reviewing!

MyLifeInWhole: hmmnnnnn. Well, you could say that in a way ^_^. I, myself, am not sure if I should just have Gaara having a platonic love for Saku or if I should go for romantic love. Thanks for voicing your thoughts!

Kate Uchiha: Don't worry, she wont turn into a man hater. She'd be a little wary of Sasu but I don't want her to end up hating men. I totally agree with you! Gaara is soooooooooo adorable. I love him to bits, I love Sasu too but he's a bit of a bastard sometimes. Saku usually over-analyzes events, which results to her constant confusion about her feelings, which in turn makes her change her mood faster than a bullet. ^_^

woodbyne: You know what? You're the only one to get the "don't you dare die on me Sakz" moment, and the dress issue too! You're very observant and it shows in your reviews. Karin has some issues/scenes in future chaps, you'll find out why she's the only one who "got" Saku's fascination to Gaara's smell. I'm not sure yet what to make of Gaara's feelings to Saku, I already have a plan but it isn't that concrete yet. ^_^

I'm not sure if this chap contains enough angst for you *-*', for a reason I don't seem to get, I can't for the life of me write angst these days.

We'll get to see Gaara's other cars in future chaps. Any suggestion for names? ^_^

xiamesee: Lots of choices huh? ^_^. I haven't really decided on how to proceed with Gaara yet. I have a plan but it could still change depending on my reviewer's response. Thanks for reviewing! And I'm glad you made up with your Mum ^_^

illneverknow: Yeah Gaara is really sweet. I wish I had someone like him! I'm happy that you can relate with Saku's personality, it means I portrayed her like a normal person. I'm planning on doing a sort of sequel but focusing on NaruHina and them being in college. I'm not sure if I could accomplish it though. ^_^

Thank you for the review guyz!

* * *

_italics-flashback_

* * *

naruto isn't mine

* * *

**Chapter 18 Indecisive Confrontation**

"HOT DAMN! Is that Sakura?" Everyone turned towards the direction Kiba set his eyes on.

It was Sakura indeed. She was walking towards Kakashi-sensei. She looked different. She's currently wearing something my troublesome girlfriend normally wears. Her hair was shorter and her glasses were nowhere in sight.

I turned towards Ino. She looked rather smug. "What did you do?" This could get out of hand if people start to notice her. Good thing Sasuke decided not to come. If he was here, well it's troublesome to think about, so I won't think about it.

"Isn't she gorgeous!" She's ecstatic, an ecstatic Ino usually equals to trouble. I, being her boyfriend, would have to troubleshoot everything by late afternoon. This does not bode well. I wanted to sleep!

I looked back at Sakura. She was currently talking with Kakashi-sensei. A redhead stood beside her, glaring at everyone taking glances at the pinkette. Sabaku Gaara, Suna's homicidal genius. This weekend might turn out more troublesome than it already is.

"Gaara's here! Good!" She held my hand and dragged me towards the pair. "Come on Shika-kun! I want to congratulate her on her first real date after sooooo long!"

"First date? Who's going on her first date Ino?" We turned around and I resigned my fate into making this weekend a less-than-usual troublesome event, it seems it would be impossible. Uzumaki Naruto just arrived with his best friend. What a draaaag!

I sighed and gave up fighting my instinct to just go to our designated cottage and sleep. "Ino, I'm going to our cottage," I was about to go when she got hold of my left ear. Guess I have to stay and witness something troublesome again. My shoulders slumped and I closed me eyes.

"Naruto," her voice was rather evil. "A little birdie TOLD me that you'd be coming here ALL ALONE. WHY oh WHY is Mr. Playboy HERE?" The more emphasis she puts in her words, the more force is applied to my left ear. I sighed. I wonder if I could sleep on my current position. It wouldn't hurt to try.

**Change of POV**

This is interesting. _Somebody's_ favorite _friend_ had a change of heart? No, no, much more like a change in wardrobe. Where did the jeans, hoodies, t-shirts and sneakers go? It was replaced with a modest but form-fitting top, a miniskirt and strappy high heeled footwear! If I was their age, I would really appreciate the view! Yes I would! No doubt about it!

"Kakashi-sensei?" Fingers snapped in front of my face and the angry growl made me remember that the owner of the lower limbs that momentarily got me enthralled was way too young, not to mention scarily strong for my tastes. The redhead who growled beside her was also a VERY big reminder that no one was allowed to look at the pinkette the wrong way, unless that person has a death wish.

"Sakura-chan! What can I do for you?" I have to call the boys over. Today would be a fun day to torture my favorite nephew! I smiled behind my surgical mask. I could finally get back at him for bringing those felines inside my house which was full of canines! I had suffered a week, trying to put my living room back in place.

My intentions were pure! I had wanted to help him get the pinkette when I gave him the copy of my precious Icha-Icha: High School Love. It was a collectors' item and I had bribed numerous powerful men and women to get a hold of that book! I didn't know that his way of showing gratitude consisted of sending me a box full of cats!

"Gaara-kun, how are you?" He crossed his arms and stared at me pointedly. In a bad mood I see.

The pinkette laughed at the redhead's expression. She then proceeded to hug him while facing me. "Chill Raraa!" She was about to talk when Gaara-kun uncrossed his arms and messed her hair. "Hey! Ino will kill me if you ruin her masterpiece!" She was removing the redhead's hand from her hair but failed miserably. "Raraa quit it! You've ruined it enough in your car!" She started whining when he didn't stop. "I'm gonna give Mats your baby pictures! I swear I will! That one where you were wearing that Kung fu Panda costume!" The hair messing did not cease. "And I'll give your fan girls a copy too!" The _abuse _continued on. "I have your email add, and your mobile number! I know your Facebook password!" The hand on the pinkette's hair slightly slowed. "I WILL ANNOUNCE TO THE WORLD THAT YOU oooofff-," the redhead covered her mouth with his hand and shook his head with amusement. The pinkette was still mumbling something beneath his hand while glaring halfheartedly at the redhead.

"If I release your mouth, will you promise not to talk my ear off with your inane theories?" The _abused _pinkette unwillingly nodded.

When she was released she got something from Gaara-kun's back pocket. A small commotion made me look behind the pair. Not twenty meters away, there was a female blond jumping up and down, ecstatic, while holding a bored-looking brunette's hands. Another blonde, a boy this time, was jaw-slacked and was repeatedly elbowing a raven, who looked about ready to commit murder. The others around them were grinning/smirking at the scene in their midst.

"Ibiki-sensei told us to give you this," I looked back at the pinkette and noticed the small note on her hand. I took the note and put it in my pocket. Must be some sort of instruction for the bonfire later. I'm gonna call cousin Obito in a moment, this is going to be so much fun.

It's time for Kakashi/Itachi/Obito/Tobi/Shishui's-amazing-revenge/damage control-on-the-littlest-Uchiha to commence. After all, who else would look after the brat but his own kin?

"Sakura-chan, your friends are looking this way," she was about to turn around when I continued, "I have never seen my favorite nephew literally turn red in anger before," she flinched and I smiled wickedly, "I wonder what had happened."

The pinkette held the redhead's hand tightly. Inhaling and exhaling lungful of air while closing her eyes. I had expected her to say 'I can do this! Yes I can!' but she didn't. Awww. That would have been funny! My grin disappeared from behind my mask when I noticed the redhead glaring at me. "Thank you for the note Sakura-chan, Gaara-kun. I must make my leave now, have fun!"

I opened my mobile phone and pushed speed dial 9. "Weasel, your little brother is turning red in anger. Damage control sounds good right about now."

**Change of POV**

He's here? No, he couldn't be. Naru said he won't come. Kakashi-sensei must be messing with me.

"I have never seen my favorite nephew literally turn red in anger before," great! Great! Just great! This is just what I needed! How am I supposed to heal? Shit! I can't see him this soon! "I wonder what had happened," as if you didn't know Kakashi-sensei! You do nothing but gossip like old ladies in the faculty room! "Thank you for the note Sakura-chan, Gaara-kun. I must make my leave now, have fun!" Have fun? Have fun? You have got to be shitting me? How is this supposed to be fun?

He's probably still mad about the hit he got from me. I know he won't hit me back but he'd surely say something really _nice_ to make me break down or something. He's really good at that. If there would be an award for the best person to cause non-bodily harm towards me then it would be him, the 'Hurt Haruno Sakura without Using Violence Award' or something like that. I could accept physical blows better, I wish he'd hit me back rather than open that mouth of his.

Okay. Calm down Sakura. You can still avert this disaster. All you have to do is run really fast and hide somewhere. It shouldn't be that hard, right? Oh my god I'm such a coward! Am I really this weak? God I'm so lame!

He can't possibly hurt me more! He's done about every little thing to hurt me; I don't see what else he could do to add more damage to my already damaged self!

"_Why? Why do I look stupid?" I wore this dress for you! I specifically chose this red dress coz it's your favorite color! Now, you're telling me that I look stupid? _

_I looked at the girl beside him and my heart clenched. She was breathtaking and she was positively glowing, proud of the guy she had in her arm. I never stood a chance against her and I don't stand a chance now. Why am I even trying? Everyone knows that I am nothing but his best female friend. A FRIEND, not one of his 'conquests', not one of his 'experienced' girls but a friend, his virgin friend._

_I tried to swallow the growing lump in my throat. I reached seven swallows but it was still there, nagging, reminding me that I'm hurt, that I'm in pain and that I should leave before I make an even bigger fool out of myself. I should leave before I start crying. I should leave before I hurt myself more and put more damage to my already wavering self esteem. I was wrong to think that I could do this, that I could face the two of them without feeling anything. _

_I shouldn't have come. I should have just stayed home. I can't believe I allowed myself to believe that he'd notice me, notice me as a 'girl' and not as his friend._

_Karin was holding his arm and she was smiling sadly at me. She doesn't even know how I feel and she looks at me that way. She'd probably laugh at me more if she finds out how I truly feel for him. _

_Like me, she was also wearing a red dress. Only hers was way shorter than what I'm wearing and its way too revealing compared to mine. Her makeup was perfect as usual; she would have looked angelic if not for the almost-constant smirk on her lips._

_People say Karin and I kinda look like each other; I'm nothing but a poor imitation of her, a second-class copy compared to her. They may say that I'm a better person than her but still, I feel insanely inferior compared to her. Because the fact still remains that Sasucakes chose her over me. What does Karin have that I don't? _

_I stared at their linked arms. I've wished on more than a million stars already. I've wished that it would be me linked to his arm like that, that it would be me who makes him smile, that it would be me he'd take out to dinner and that it would be me he'd share his life with. _

_Instead, here I am being called stupid for choosing a dress colored red, red-his favorite color! I should have just stayed home than attend this stupid prom! I MUST look stupid! Even my date is nowhere in sight! Where the hell is Naru? Is the men's room really that far?_

_I looked back at Sasucakes eyes. He looked angry, for what reason, I'm not sure of. He was glaring at me like I was a slut or something. I glanced back at Karin. Her outfit was a more 'mature' version of my dress, it has lesser cloth and it shows more skin. _

_I looked around us. When is Naru coming back? I don't wanna be here anymore. Ino-pig convinced me to come, telling me the suffering I encountered in wearing the dress and the stupid heels would be worth it once Sasucakes notices me. He noticed me alright; I didn't think he'd say I looked stupid though. Well, that's the last time I'd follow Ino-pig's advice! _

"_Girls like you aren't supposed to be wearing things like that," I whipped my head and stared at Sasucakes. He was looking at my dress with disgust! Do I really look disgusting! "It's too revealing. Are you trying to get yourself picked up by some random stranger?" Picked up? Random stranger?_

"_Are you telling me I'm a slut Sasucakes?" I didn't think he'd go that far. He's normally careful in choosing his words. I looked down on my dress again, it is a little bit revealing, and one could see half of my back but aside from that I don't think its worth to be called a slut's dress. Even my Pein-nii approved of it._

_Oh my God I am going to murder that Pig! I hate her! And I hate you Sasucakes! This is the last time I'd ever dress up for you!_

"_Sasu, let her be. If she wants to dress that way, it is none of our business," thank you Karin! "Although I do understand how you feel. She's like your sister right? So it's all natural to feel protective," sister? Sister? Ooohhh! I hate you sometimes Karin! It may be true but it still hurts! You just HAD to SAY it! And you had the audacity to look concerned while saying it! Concerned my ass! You're obviously flaunting to my face that you look better than me! Oh my god, I can't do this. Karin is my friend, I can't bash her in my mind!_

"_Why would you say that? Your girlfriend's dress looks way more revealing than mine!" I couldn't help but voice out though. If he thinks my dress is slutty, I don't know what to call Karin's outfit!_

"_She looks good in it, it suits her," so I look bad then? I looked down on my dress. I am going to burn you, red dress of mine! So I won't be reminded that Sasucakes once called me a slut!  
_

I'll let him go. I'll give him up, if that's what makes him happy then I have no right to force myself into his life.

After all, we were never meant for each other. Those talks about dreams and feelings were not worth shit! He was just looking for someone who would take his crap willingly, and I, stupid fool that I am just had to put meaning to them! This is entirely my fault. I had put this upon myself.

From now on, I won't put any meaning to what he would say/do, no matter how important I feel when he talks to me about his fears.

"_Why didn't you attend class Sasucakes? Kakashi-sensei snickered and gave a long quiz when he found out that you were absent. Did you two argue again? I swear he acts more like a brother than an estranged uncle," nobody answered when I knocked so I got in uninvited. _

_Sasucakes was nothing but a lump at the center of his bed, unmoving and mute. I sat on his bed and poked his side. There was an annoyed grunt. I poked again. More annoyed grunts._

"_This is fun!" I poked him more until he hissed and got out of the covers._

"_Stop it woman! What is wrong with you?" His hair was disheveled and he looked miserable. Something is clearly bothering him. I held his face and looked straight in his eyes._

_He looked rather uncomfortable and looked out the window. He held my hands and put them down. He stood up and glared at the bed as if it had wronged him somehow._

"_What did your bed do this time?" My voice made him flinch a little. Did I do something wrong?_

"_What are you talking about Sakz?" I stood up and approached him. When I was a step away he moved backwards."What are you doing?"_

"_What do you mean what am I doing? What are YOU doing?" I advanced towards him further and he continued moving backwards. "What's wrong Sasucakes? Are you okay?"He's acting weird. _

_He stopped and used his arms as his shield. "I'm fine; just don't come near me alright?"_

_What? I breathed in deep and looked down. Okay. Not going near him. My throat is starting to hurt and my eyes were starting to water. At least he was honest enough to tell me. I glanced at the door. Should I just leave him here? He looks really bothered, I can't just leave him. But I just can't force myself upon him. If he doesn't want me near him then so be it. If it makes him happy then I'll do it. It would hurt, but I'd do it._

"_I guess I better go then?" If my presence disgusts him this much then maybe I should just leave him alone._

"_NO don't leave!" He grabbed my hand and he sighed really deep. "Stay," I looked at him, confused._

"_What do you want Sasucakes?" I come over; you try to get rid of me. I try to comfort you and you tell me to go away. When I do try to go, you stop me. I looked at his hand that was grasping my hand. What happened to the -Don't come near me? _

_He sighed and let go of my arm. He sat down on the floor with his knees up, and then positioned his forehead on top of it."I want you to stay?" His voice sounded anguished. "Stay here and wash away my fears with your laughter," huh? That statement was really 'un-Sasuke' like. There is something definitely wrong with him!_

"_Are you okay?" I sat down beside him and he flinched again. Are we okay? Did I do something? We were okay yesterday. Why is he suddenly uncomfortable when I go near him? He shook his head, like he's shaking something out of his brain. "Are we okay? You and me, are we still friends?" He looked at me, shocked at what I said. He raised a single eyebrow. I expected that he would say something like 'you are annoying Sakz' but he didn't._

"_I dreamed of something real bad," he shook his head slowly this time. "I feel like a scum for dreaming of such such such-" he sighed and looked at me. "I dreamed of something I am not support to be dreaming of," he looked like he wanted to cry. "I'm such a bad person!" Oh so that's it!_

_I smiled at him. "I dreamed of being an assassin one time. It was really fun and exciting! My uniform was really cool! I wore a porcelain mask painted with tribal black ink; I wore a black grey armor and metal arm gloves! And I had ninja sandals! I had a swirly tattoo on my shoulder too! I went to forests, kingdoms, caves, I went everywhere! I met kings and soldiers and knights and normal people too! There was this cute little dog that went with me everywhere! It was amazing coz it can talk!I think his name was-" I stopped when he groaned out loud. _

"_What are you talking about? You're confusing me Sakz," I can tell that he wanted to shake some sense into me. I couldn't help it. I laughed at his expression._

_He looked taken aback at first. "I was trying to tell you something silly!" He looked at me like I grew two heads and I laughed some more. "I was an assassin in my dream; does that make me a killer?" I smiled at him again._

_He stared at me for a few seconds. He leaned his head on my shoulder and sighed then closed his eyes. His scent filled my nostrils; I smiled and told myself that jumping him would be a very baaaaadd idea. "__When I'm feeling tired and afraid, how do you know just what to say to make everything all right?" I almost didn't hear him. In fact, I'm not even sure if that was what he said. His voice was so soft that it was almost inaudible._

_A flash caught my eye and I turned towards the door to see a giggling Mikoto-san. "Awwwwwwww! Baby Sasu-chan is bonding with my future daught-"_

_"MOTHER!"_

He didn't mean all those. He was just lonely and he wanted something or someone to entertain him.

And I did not spend sleepless nights crying my eyes out for nothing! I will be numb whether I like it or not! I can do this! I can face him without crumbling into bits and pieces for him to step on. I will show him that I am fine. If I have to pretend, I will, to make it better. To save at least a small amount of our friendship. I'll hide my tears from him if it means I'd still have him as a friend. No matter how hard it is, no matter how painful it is for me. I'd settle for that, I'd settle being his friend. It's better than nothing. It's better than nothing at all. If I can't be his _someone_, then I can be his _anyone_. _Anyone _is better than being his _no one._ What am I saying? I'm confusing myself more!

Can I do this? Can I face him after everything that I've said and done? I should, so this dilemma would end. So the tension within our group would disappear.

But I could just run and hide. It's better than smiling a fake smile then end up bawling like it's the end of the world afterwards.

Okay, it's decided. I'll run and hide for now. I'll face him tomorrow or maybe next week. Next month would be fine too. Maybe make it next year so I could practice talking to him in my mind. Yeah, that would be good.

"Sakura-chan!" Shit! Naru already saw me. It's too late to run back to Eyeshadow and hide.

The hand I was gripping squeezed me back. "You can do this Sakzie," I looked at Raraa and sighed.

"You really think so?" I hate how my voice sounds right now. I feel pathetic. I wanna shake my nerves away but I'd look stupid.

Raraa smiled at me. "Of course you can. You're strong, you can pull through. You always pull through," his other hand eased the crease on my large forehead. "You have been in this situation numerous times before and you got out alive right? What makes today more different?" Today is different because I had an "I love you-I hate you" speech directed at him days prior! Life sucks! Aargggh! "And if you feel that you could not take it anymore, just give me the go signal, I'll rip his throat for you."

That had got to be the most number of words Raraa used in his lifetime. He looked seriously serious that I couldn't hold back my laughter. "Oh my god Raraa! That's a new record! You spoke five sentences!" I held his hand more firmly and pulled him towards our friends. No sense hiding now. I need to ahmm face my fear! I am Haruno Sakura and I am amazingly amazing! I can do this! "And you're not allowed to kill him; my life would suck more without him," he smiled at me. I love being around Raraa, he makes me feel protected. Kinda like Sasucak-no Sasuke, kinda like Sasuke does, only more on the homicidal side of things. I feel comfortable around him too. It's like I'm with Sasucak-no Sasuke, it's like I'm with Sasuke but without intense feelings involved.

I sighed. We were a few feet away from _him _when I stopped. I can do this! I have Raraa, Ino and Naru and the others here! I have to show them that I'm stronger now!

"Hi guys!" The smile I had on my face was painful, the effort it entailed was enormous. But I know I can do this! I will do this!

**Change of POV**

"Sakura-chan, what happened?" I'm really confused right now. Why is Sakura-chan wearing that short skirt? She doesn't like skirts! Not to mention the ridiculous footwear! She hates wearing those damned high heels!

"_Forehead! You should just accept the fact that you NEED these heels!" Ino was waving the scary shoes in front of Sakura-chan. "You're puny! We're going to PROM! PROM! You can't wear sneakers during PROM!"_

_We were at Sakura-chan's house for Ino's 'dress rehearsal' for the prom. Shikamaru fell asleep within minutes in the couch. Sasuke-teme went directly in Sakura-chan's room to get some shut-eye. He probably didn't get any sleep the night before, being insomniac. He likes sleeping in Sakura-chan's room during daytime (probably cos the pillows smell like Sakura-chan's shampoo! Heh teme! You are so freakin obvious!) and grabs the opportunity each time we visit. He rarely gets the chance cos Sakura-chan's brothers 'hate' him and glare at him when Sakura-chan isn't looking. It's funny to see him squirm a little bit under their gaze. He's lucky they're not home today._

"_I could too!" Sakura-chan is stubborn. I am proud of her! "No one will notice Pig! The dress will conceal whatever footwear I'll use!" She has a point. _

"_But your partner is TALL! And your dress will have a slit on the side! AND you're a freaking dwarf compared to Naruto!" I wouldn't say that, Ino is exaggerating! "When you dance, you'd look like a grade-schooler dancing with her uncle!"_

"_Hey! I'm not old-looking!" I stood up and pointed an accusing finger at Ino._

"_Shut up Naruto!" I closed my mouth, retracted my arm and sat down again. Ino is scary! "And besides, people will think you're crazy! Pairing a dress with your dirty sneakers!"_

"_Why are you two so loud Sakz? I was sleeping." Teme got out of Sakura-chan's room with a scowl. He was still clutching Sakura-chan's favorite pillow. Heh. Again, you are sooooo obvious Teme!_

"_Sorry Sasucakes. Ino was being Ino again," Sakura-chan smiled her smile-the smile that she reserves for Sasuke-Teme only- before she turned back to Ino. "My dirty sneakers can so be paired with a dress!"_

"_Who in their right mind would appreciate that combination?" Ino was pulling her own hair now. She must be really frustrated._

"_I do," the three of us looked/gaped at Sasuke-teme. He was starting to blush. Hah Teme! You never did learn! You should already know to never enter a conversation when you had just woken up from sleep! Everyone knows your genius brain needs roughly fifteen minutes to jumpstart after your shut eye! You and Sakura-chan have the worst foot-IN-mouth disease minutes after waking up. You always fail to think before you speak! _

"_Really Sa-su-cakes?" I couldn't help but tease him. He blushed some more and I wanted to cackle in glee! _

_Since we became roommates, I have abused his inability-to-think-straight-after-waking-up disability to my advantage. I ask him questions he wouldn't normally answer during that time. Then rub it in his face after wards. I know most of his well-kept secrets-secrets like always dreaming of Sakura-chan! _

"_Shut up Dobe! I have seen her wearing a dress and pairing it with her sneakers. It looks alright so yeah. And stop wiggling your eyebrows if you don't want me to burn them!" His expression was priceless! He was advancing towards me so I ran for cover behind Sakura-chan._

"_Whatever makes you happy Teme!" He tried to grab me but Sakura-chan stopped him. Hah! Take that Teme! Your 'dream girl' likes me more than you!_

"_No need to use violence Sasucakes. And Pig, high heels are male inventions to make it harder for us to run away from pervs," Sakura-chan sounded like she was lecturing a small child. Teme was hiding his chuckles by coughing. "But since Naru will be my gorgeous date, I guess I have to look presentable."_

_I ignored Teme's indignant "Gorgeous? You've gotta be kidding me!" _

"_I love you Sakura-chan!" I wanted to hug her but Teme got hold of my shirt's collar. _

"_Yeah yeah, I love you too Naru. So much that I'll wear that abomination," she smiled cheekily at me before she continued, "don't you dare leave me on prom night Naru, or I swear I'll make you wear those horrendous heels!"_

"Did Ino blackmail you or something?"

Sakura-chan laughed, her laugh was hollow though. I looked beside me and saw that Teme was glaring at something in front of us. I followed his line of vision and saw that he was looking at Sakura-chan's trembling hand which was intertwined with Gaara's. "Of course not Naru. I just felt like I needed a change," she let go of Gaara's hand and did a little twirl. "Why? Do I look _stupid_ Naru?" Of course not! She looks fine! I was about to talk when Teme beat me to it.

"Sakz, what-" Teme didn't get to finish though and I'm glad he didn't. He would have had said something that would upset Sakura-chan. Man, Teme is so clueless when it comes to Sakura-chan!

"You look fine Sakzie," it was Gaara who answered her. He was meeting Teme's glare levelly. Sakura-chan smiled at Gaara and sniffed his shirt.

"You don't look so bad yourself Raraa," she sniffed again. "And you smell good too!" I can feel Teme almost vibrating in anger. I don't think this is a good idea. Ino was giggling and convincing Hina-chan to help her coo at Sakura-chan and Gaara.

"Sakz," there was an underlying warning in Teme's voice. I looked around me. Kiba, Shikamaru, Neji and Shino. We could hold Sasuke-teme back-I think.

Sakura-chan moved her attention from Gaara's shirt to Sasuke-teme. "What is it Sasuke?" Everyone suddenly stopped whatever it is that they were doing and gaped at Sakura-chan. I, myself gaped at her too. Sasuke? Sasuke? Where the hell did Sasucakes go? I think we all heard it wrong. Teme was taken aback too! "Sasuke?" So we heard it right.

"Sakura-chan?" You're making me worry. "Are you alright?"

"She is fine Naruto," Gaara was looking at me like he wanted to say something else. "Is there anything you need? Sakzie and I need to prepare for tonight's bonfire activities," no one answered him. "Let's go Sakzie," he held Sakura-chan's shoulder and guided her to walk away. I held Teme's arm.

"Don't!" I don't want my two bestfriends killing each other.

"Sabaku, where are you taking her?" He held my hand and forcibly removed it from his arm. He walked towards Gaara and Sakura-chan. "Answer me Sabaku."

The tension in the air was rising. Fuck! This will NOT be good!

* * *

Wacha guys think? What do you think is the best way for Sasuke to deal with this situation? Should he confront Saku already, or should he wait?


	19. four sides of the square

Yo!

This chap is a little short but its filled with "question-arising-situations". It has a little "major" twist in the story.

The "unexplained" will be explained next chap so feel free to ask whatever it is that confuses you guys so I could include it in chapter 20. And suggestions are pretty much welcomed too!

This chap is a little rushed because my big brother (annoying person that he is!) wants dibs on the computer. He just came home from work after soooo long, so I had no choice but to give in. *-*' Forgive me for the mistakes? ^_^

blue(dot)teddybear: One Sasu-torture coming right up! Thank you for the review! dunno how to put dots without it disappearing, sorry! *-*'

totalride321: I apologize if the changing POV's confused you. I try not to mention whose POV it is because I like it if my readers guess it for me. Sooo sorry if I confused you. In this chap, you can tell whose POV it is by the way the character calls other characters. Sasuke calls Sakura SAKZ and calls Garaa SABAKU (1st POV), Sakura calls Sasuke SASUCAKES-although she tries her beat to call him SASUKE- and calls Gaara RARAA (2nd POV), Gaara calls Sakura SAKZIE and calls Sasuke UCHIHA (3rd POV). I can't divulge who the 4th POV is, its kinda like a surprise, I want you guys to guess who it is. ^_^ I'll tell you who it is next chap!

EndlessFlame911: Thank you for that really longgggg review! ^_^

You were almost right, Sasu almost blew up in everybody's faces. A "surprising occurrence" prevented him from doing so however. ^_^

You got my ANBU reference and the My Life would Suck Without You moment! Yey for you! I was looking at a drawing of ANBU Kakashi and listening to the song when I wrote that.

And I know you'd finish all your plans! I believe in you! ^_^

BadassAlec: How I WISH I could write a scene with "normal" sexual tension in the air but weh! I couldn't do it! I tried and its utter crap I tell ya! ^_^ Thanks for the review!

xiamesee: I have the continuation now , but I think this would make you more "curious". Ahmmmm. Sorry in advance if that happens?^_^. I'll make it up next chapter.

illneverknow: Sooo happy the previous chapter made you excited enough to giggle by yourself. Nobody saw you right? They might think that you're giggling with your imaginary friend or something. Just kidding! As always, thank you for sticking around!

crazymel2008: Request granted. I have Sasuke's POV here, although its a bit different from the usual Sasuke POV.

woodbyne: I have angst in this chap! Its not Saku doing it though! hihi. I had a bit of Sasu torture from Saku, I figured he should at least feel some of the hurt he inflicted on Saku in the past.

I loved writing Shika's POV, I had wanted to make it longer but his laziness prevented me from doing so. ^_^. Thanks for liking my portrayal of Kakashi and Mikoto.

As usual, you got my "sneakiness" again with the ANBU dream Saku had. Yey for you!

I hope the amount of angst (so little *sigh* but I tried my best!) here satisfies you. ^_^

* * *

Thank you to BATMANROCKS, krtkuchiha, MexicanAngel01, chibi-fyed, and cherrylove13 for adding bttb to theier faves/alerts list!

enjoy reading! ^_^

* * *

_italics-flashback_

naruto isn't mine._  
_

* * *

**chapter 19: four sides of the square**

"What is it Sasuke?" What? Did Sakz just-no I must have heard it wrong. "Sasuke?" What the-yes, yes I guess she did. She just called me my 'non-special' name. Not that I like it when she calls me Sasucakes but yeah.

I glared at Sabaku more. Why did he have to come to this stupid retreat! And why are they together? Did he drive her all the way here? She used to ride with me each time we go out of town. Why the hell did she ride with the stupid redhead? And why were they holding hands? I couldn't stop the growl coming out of my throat. I fucking hate stupid Sabaku!

If I could have my way, I'd have punched the living daylights out of him. I'd do it too if it won't upset Sakz. For some unknown reason, she is very fond of the redhead.

I hate this feeling! I wanted her to hold MY hand, I wanted her to smile AT ME, I wanted her to give attention TO ME, and it may sound crazy but I wanted her to SMELL ME, not him!

"Sakura-chan? Are you alright?" I barely heard the Dobe's voice, there was a distinct ringing in my ears and my mind was telling me to punch Sabaku, grab Sakz away, then demand an explanation from her once we're alone. Why is she with him? Didn't she just sort of confess a few days ago? Was I putting too much meaning to her words? Did she mean what she was saying?

"She is fine Naruto," you would know, huh Sabaku? "Is there anything you need? Sakzie and I need to prepare for tonight's bonfire activities," Sakz would forgive me if I only hit him once, right? Just one punch or kick! Just to get this anger out of my system. If I can't get this out I'm going to fucking explode! "Let's go Sakzie," and the stupid redhead fucking held her shoulder! Fuck I'm gonna fucking kill him!

"Don't!" Fuck it if I don't! I held the Dobe's hand and removed it from my shoulder. Fucking Sabaku!

"Sabaku, where are you taking her?" The ringing in my ears got louder as I approached them. "Answer me Sabaku," my hands were itching to get his filthy hands away from Sakz. Why is she allowing him to touch her? Fuck! I fucking hate him!

I stopped in front of them, blocked their path and glared at Sabaku. He met my glare with a bored expression. I oughta punch that expression off his face! I looked at the pinkette he was holding.

Sakz jade eyes were on me. "What do you want Sasuke?" Fuck! "Say it already, Raraa and I have lots of things to do?" Raraa? Sasuke? Fuck! This is pissing me off! Why is she still calling him 'Raraa' when she's calling me 'Sasuke' already? I glared at the redhead again. Say something! Say something bad so I could have an excuse to fucking hit you! I could feel my body shaking, trying to stop myself from charging right at him. Why the fuck is he fucking calm?

I heard Sakz sigh deeply. I looked at her. She was looking at me rather dispassionately, like she was bored of me or something. All I could see in her eyes was apathy, like I was nobody important. I felt a painful tug at my chest. My anger melted away and I started to feel unimportant. I always felt like a superhero each time she looks at me, like I owned the world and she was there with me, supporting me all the way. She was my number one fan and I was her number one protector, a person important to her. Now, I feel like just another face in the crowd, just another guy in the street; a fucking invisible entity, a nobody.

"Sakz, I- " I was surprised with the volume of my voice, it was barely a whisper. She raised a dispassionate eyebrow. I felt like a knife was stabbing my throat and there was a tight squeeze on my chest. This unfeeling pinkette could not be _my Sakz. _"I-" I could not get words out, what is happening to me? Why is talking taking up too much effort? Why does it feel like my throat was being sliced open? I can't speak, I can barely breathe properly.

"Spit it out Uchiha, I have a schedule to follow," no, she just could not be _my_ Sakz, this person in front of me just could not be her! The person in front of me is cold, _my _Sakz always radiated warmth. The person in front of me is smirking, _my _Sakz smiles. The person in front of me has dead eyes, _my _ Sakz' eyes were alive and full of emotions. I couldn't look at her eyes anymore. I looked down and sighed as I remembered something.

"_Sasucakes!" Sakz was jumping/skipping towards my chair. She was humming a melody when she sat down beside me. I huffed; I was not particularly fond of the morning. No one could blame me! I had just caught my girlfriend enthusiastically riding the little brother of my aniki's best friend, that fucking sharkface! I didn't plan on going to school but it would upset my mother. _

_Sakz was starting to talk my ear off. I don't want to talk to anybody right now. I stood up and walked towards the door of the classroom. I heard footsteps following me, I turned and saw Sakz. "Where are you going Sasucakes?" It's nobody's business. Get out of my sight before I fucking yell at you. "Sasucakes? I'll go with you? I can't leave you alone after what happened last night," I looked blankly at her. What does she care if my girlfriend cheated on me? She wasn't the one who was hurt and betrayed. I didn't answer her. "I don't want you to do anything drastic. I could shut up if you don't want to talk," she must be thinking that I'd go suicidal again._

_I continued to walk out of the school building. Her footsteps was starting to get on my nerves, I stopped and looked dispassionately at her again. Doesn't she get it? I don't want to be around people right now, I want to be left alone. "Sas-"_

"_What is it?" She was taken aback when I hissed at her. _

"_I, Sas-" she bit her lip and her eyes were starting to water but she didn't continue. Her impending tears pissed me off more. Why do girls use tears as a weapon when guys get pissed? I hate it when she cries! _

"_Spit it out Haruno, I have a schedule to follow," her tears fell and I felt guilt eating my conscience. I wanted to take it back but I know taking it back wouldn't erase the fact that I made her cry. _

_She inhaled a huge amount of air and smiled bitterly at me. "Do you really like Karin that much Sasucakes?" She looked behind her and smiled again. "You don't have to use that tone on me you know, I could understand if you told me NICELY to get the hell away from you. I just don't like seeing your eyes so out of it, it makes me uncomfortable," she held my face and I let her. She was openly crying now. "It's painful for me to see your eyes look so dead when you look at me. Please understand that I am doing this because I don't want you to feel alone." _

_I stubbornly kept my eyes blank. She smiled bitterly again. "I just want to see you happy, and if getting rid of me does that, I'll do it," she let go of my face and stared at her hands "But could you please wait for a few years?" Her voice was pained and she started to turn around. She looked down and whispered to herself, "I just couldn't do it right now," I wasn't sure if she had said it; her voice was too low to be deciphered. _

_She had then walked away from me, without the skip she had when she entered our classroom. I had wanted to follow her but decided not to. She'd come back to talking my ear off and comforting me the next day. She always comes back to me no matter how sad I make her sometimes. _

Is this how she felt that time? Did I make her feel this pain? It must have been hard for her. I had ignored her for days after that. Did she cry the whole time?

"Well, if you have nothing to say then we'll get going," I didn't look up. I didn't want to see her unfeeling eyes. "Tachi-nii, what a surprise!"

I looked up and saw my aniki and my elder cousin Shishui. They were looking at me with concern. My shoulders were slumped and I had wanted nothing more than to lie down and think. This constant throat pain and chest tightness is draining my energy.

"Sakura-chan! You look lovely today!" Shishui was looking at her up and down. "Is it me or do you look different?"

I myself glanced at her. Aside from the clothes and the hair, she looked the same. I looked away and sighed. "She looks the same to me. A vertically challenged girl with pink hair, pale complexion and a larger-than-normal forehead," I felt pain on my head. I looked behind me and saw Kakashi grinning behind his mask with a rather evil glint I his eyes. "What's the big deal Kakashi?"

"Do you even know how many degrees of wrong that sounded Sasuke? Little Pinky dressed up for once and you tell her she looked the same?" I looked back at my aniki. "And its UNCLE Kakashi, foolish little brother, learn some manners."

"What are you talking about? She does look the same to me; whatever she wears she would always be my-fuck! She got it all wrong, didn't she?" I looked back at where Sakz stood only to find that she was gone.

"You only realized that now little brother? I cannot believe you are in some way related to me," he may look composed as ever but stupid Itachi was obviously laughing on the inside at my present situation. "Although I must admit, you are undeniably superb in putting yourself in-what does Little Blondie call it? Ah, I remember now, a 'cluster fuck' of a situation when it concerns Little Pinky."

"Way to go, Sasu-chan!" Shishui messed my hair and laughed at my misery. "Deidara was right! You ARE emotionally constipated!" I ignored their snickers and looked around. No sign of pink anywhere.

"Where the hell did they go?"

**Change of POV**

As we turned around, I heard Naru's nervous "Don't!" I tried to walk faster but the pretty, strappy wedge heels were a little difficult to walk in.

"Raraa, can't you just carry me and run? I wanna get out of here!" Raraa chuckled and shook his head. No chance in hell then.

I sighed. I survived round one. Well, I _barely _survived round one. I'm in one piece but I could actually _feel _the walls I built around myself _cracking._ I still feel it, the excitement I experience each time I see him, the butterflies-in-my-stomach-when-you're-around feeling. I can still feel the familiar sting in my eyes at the sight of him. I can still feel the stabbing pain in my chest and the enormous effort I must exert in order to breathe properly; its still there-he could still take my breathe away with one look. I was nothing more but his nerdy friend, only good in books and nothing else.

ACCEPT IT HARUNO SAKURA! Accept it already! Uchiha Sasuke will never love you; he will never love you back! He won't no matter what you do, no matter how you change your appearance, no matter how you show you care. You are nothing to him. You are not good enough for him.

"I do not want to add any more aggression to Uchiha's aggressiveness Sakzie," aggression? What the hell is he talking about?

"Aggression, what aggression?" I was looking back at him and I almost stumbled when he abruptly stopped.

"That," he nodded his head in front of us and I was inclined to face whatever it was he was motioning at.

"Sabaku, where are you taking her?" Oh shit! "Answer me Sabaku," it's Sasucak-godflammit! Sasuke! It's Sasuke! And he looked about ready to pummel somebody!

Shit! I hate myself! I hate myself! Why am I not moving?

I felt Raraa's hand squeeze my shoulder before he let go. Sasuke (HELL YEAH!) , Sasuke was glaring at Raraa and I couldn't take it anymore. I swallowed and braced myself. I can do this!

"What do you want Sasuke?" There! I will not crumble in front of you! I'll do it later, when you're not present. I wanted to swallow to relieve the pain in my throat but I stopped myself. I will not show any hint of feeling in front of him. "Say it already, Raraa and I have lots of things to do," it was obvious that he was pissed off more. He glanced at Raraa again. It looked like he had wanted to release his anger on the redhead. Sheeesh! Like Raraa would let him without a fight. They'll end up killing each other if this would continue.

I sighed deeply. I closed my eyes and concentrated on putting a lid on my feelings. The person in front of me is not _my Sasucakes, _he's not. He is Uchiha Sasuke, the person who finds hurting Haruno Sakura entertaining. He is Uchiha Sasuke and I am Haruno Sakura, we are not Sasucakes and Saks. I am better off without him, he is better off without me. My world WILL NOT crumble if I lose him. I ignored the part of my brain who said "Lose him? He was never yours to begin with."

When I opened my eyes, my face was blank. I've done this in front of the mirror many times to know how I look like. I know my expression was a cross between boredom and who-the-hell-are-you look. He had the audacity to look hurt! No, I'm fooling myself. He's not hurt.

I won't comfort him. He doesn't need me. He'd told me a million times to get away from him each time I try to comfort him anyway. I'll give him what he wants. I'll show him that I don't give a shit about his feelings. I'll show him that he is nobody special to me, just like how I'm nobody special to him.

Ouch! That hurt! Stupid brain, stupidly telling the truth!

"Sakz, I-" Yes, you? I raised an eyebrow. He looked and sounded hurt. Don't look like that Sasucakes, I hate it when you look and sound like that! "I-" are you okay Sasucakes? No, no. I won't, I will NOT! And you are SASUKE, not Sasucakes! I can do this; the only thing I have left is a minute amount of pride. I will not give you the satisfaction of tearing me apart by the seams.

"Spit it out Uchiha, I have a schedule to follow."

**Change of POV**

"Spit it out Uchiha, I have a schedule to follow," I sighed at Sakzie's words. She sounded tired; tired and miserable. But it was masked by something. She's trying to 'shut down'.

I doubt Uchiha got it though. He looked hurt. Tch! good for him!

"_What are you doing?" I had just arrived at the Uchiha manor to talk to Sakzie. She was looking up front with her face devoid of emotion. It was Mikoto-san's birthday and they were going to the Uchiha beach house. _

"_It's nothing! I'm just training myself!" She smiled and then hugged me. "Did you go to her house? Is she coming with us? Did you talk to her about the two of you already? Are you with her now? Is she here?" I had no intention of answering her inane questions._

"_You are practicing what Sakzie, losing your sanity?" She scowled at me. Her attention was usually so easy to divert it's not even humorous. "You are already positively deranged; I do not see the reason for you to practice losing your mind more." _

_She laughed and hit me on my shoulder. When she stopped laughing, her expression turned somber._

"_I'm trying to shut down," she hugged me again and smelled my shirt. "Don't look at me with your what-the-fuck-look Raraa, I'm serious!" Her voice was muffled by my shirt. I patted her head and nodded for her to continue. I guess it's one of those days wherein Sakzie feels uncharacteristically lonely and prone to her so called 'Sasuke-induced-deprssion'. "I'm trying to train myself to shut down in cases where I couldn't take it anymore. I know would come sooner or later," she grinned at me then continued, "It's either that or I break down."_

"_Is there even a difference?" She had a look of confusion at first, then she nodded._

"_Yeah," she sighed and raised her head, looking at Uchiha's room. "If I break down, he'll know what he is doing to me had hurt me. If I shut down, he won't have an idea," she sighed again. "He already broke my heart; I can't let him have what's left of my pride."_

There was a figure that caught my eye. Over our far right was a girl. She had dropped her bag when she saw us. She leaned on the wall then her body slowly dragged herself down until she was sitting on the floor with her knees up. She hugged her knees and stared at us tiredly.

Breaking down.

I looked at Sakzie again and back at the girl. I see the difference now. Breaking down and shutting down.

Now more than ever, I have to accept the fact that there is nothing I could do to change whatever it was that had happened. This cycle will continue and I am powerless to stop it.

A hand had started to tug my arm; I almost forgot that I was with Sakzie and Uchiha. When I came to, I saw other Uchihas around us.

"She looks the same to me. A vertically challenged girl with pink hair, pale complexion and a larger-than-normal forehead," the tugging in my arm intensified and not a second later I was tugged away by an extremely hurt pinkette. That stupid Uchiha, he did it again.

We were already hidden from Uchiha's view when I took a glance at the girl who was still on the floor not so far away from us. Sakzie was looking at me in concern. I waved her concern away with a hand. I can handle this.

The girl on the floor started to cry and I had wanted nothing more than to comfort her. But she deserves someone better than me. I am not worthy of her and it makes me motherfuckin' pissed.

Uchiha makes her happy, she looks radiantly happy when she's with him. I cannot live with myself if I ruin her happiness. It would be like what Uchiha had done to Sai and Sakzie. I cannot suck the happiness out of her life. I should just let her be. I understand that.

So why does it hurt like a motherfucker?

If only Sakzie was not in love with him. If only my friend fell in love with somebody else, it would have been perfect. She would have had a perfect life with her perfect boyfriend. Sakzie would be out of the picture and she would have Uchiha all to herself.

I wouldn't have had to take Sakzie away from Uchiha almost all the time to ensure that the friendship between the two girls wouldn't fall apart. They wouldn't have had to 'break down' or 'shut down' in my presence.

The two most important girls in my life aside from my family are both hurting for the Uchiha. And it's pissing me off. Why can't he make up his mind? Instead of misleading the girls I care for to the brink of insanity?

**Change of POV**

They're together again. I sat down on the tiled floor and glared at the pinkette. Why do they have to be this close? Why does she have to be my friend? Why can't she be like other girls? Bitches who I could hate and verbally/physically hurt? She just _had_ to be so sweet and caring? So understanding and kind that I cant bring myself to hate her.

She's been with me through thick and thin, even though there are times wherein I torture her emotionally. She just smiles at me and acts like she understood what I was trying to do, then she'd smile at Sasu and say that she understands and "I'll come and listen once you want to talk, alright? I'm just a call away. See you Karin, see you Sasucakes." Then Sasu would look at her longingly while he was holding my hand, imagining that it was her hand he was holding. I in turn would look longingly at the person she'd go to, imagining that it was me that was approaching him with a gentle smile on my lips and a gleeful skip in my gait. Knowing that _that person_ was looking _at me _too and that there is _nothing_ I could do to erase all that had happened sucks. Why? Why? Why? Why?

Why does life have to be so motherfucking unfair?

* * *

Wacha think guys?

I'm not sure of I wrote the 4th POV according to planned. Can you guys guess who it is?


	20. dire need of talking

Yo!

Chapter 20 here! The explanation of Gaara and Karin's misunderstanding is here. I don't know if you guys are comfortable enough with having Gaara and Karin together. I haven't encountered a story about the two of them here. Does that make me weird? hehe. I just didn't want Gaara to love Saku then get hurt coz she'll eventually end up with Sasu.

I had here the song that inspired me in how to write Saku's character. You guys should listen to it! It's "Just Keep Breathing" by Automatic Loveletter.

On another note, I am very sick right now, I was supposed to be on complete bed rest but when I opened my email on my phone and saw your reviews I stood up and started typing. Your reviews gave me a temporary high! I love you guys to bits and pieces! I don't know when I'll get better, so forgive me if I take too long in updating this..*sigh* I hate the flu! I hate it! With burning passion!

And I wasn't able to check this for errors, sorry in advance! ^_^

EndlessFlame911: I forgot to tell you something last time. I was rushing because my brother was home and wanted to use the pc. You were right! The dream that Sasu had during the flashback last chapter was one of his "bad dreams" wherein he lusted for Saku, that flashback was the first time he had a dream like it.

Anyway, I'm happy that you DID review, if you didn't, I would have assumed that you didn't like the chapter or lost interest in the story. *-*'.

I mentioned one time in one of the chapters, the one where Saku almost drowned, that Sasu mentioned that "_Karin was sitting beside the youngest Sabaku. She was rather content sitting there with the other redhead." _That time I was still undecided on how to approach Gaara's relationship with Saku, it would be really sad if Gaara is downright in love with Saku and end up brokenhearted because she'll end up with Sasu, so I proceeded to go on with my previous plan, which is to have Gaara together with Karin.

I used godflammit here again! ^_^

MyLifeInWhole: yep! It was Karin! Thanks for the review! Hope you'd still be here next chapter!

BadassAlec: Damn straight! He needs to make up his mind for the safety of Saku's mind! Thanks for the review!

illneverknow: Wish granted, the update is here! I hope you'd like this chapter too. And make you giggle again. hehe. Thanks for the review! As always, it made me smile! ^_^

xiamesee: Yep, everyone was hurt, and they will continue to hurt if none of them makes a move. And said 'moving' will start this chapter! Thank you for the review!

krtkuchiha: So you had a misunderstanding with somebody similar to what happened in the story? Did you guys work it out? ^_^

I'm trying to get Sasu to talk to Saku already but every time I do, my mind conjures up other things instead. tsk. Must be my antibiotics. I'll try to make them sort things out next chapter. Love your review! "why the hell you write sooooo godamn nicely?" made me smile ^_^

blue(dot)teddybear: I'll keep using it then. I thought you would be insulted if I 'murdered' your pen name. lol. Yep, it was Karin. You guys rock! Thanks for the review!

woodbyne: I'm pretty excited for your review! ^_^ and your review last chap was really good, made me grin like crazy again. If that was a bad one for you, your good one must be really great! You give really thorough reviews.

I have something sneaky (ninja-ness) again here. I know you'd get it. ^_^

Your number 9 point last chap was a bull's eye! As expected, you got what I was trying to write.

The explanations are here. I hope it satisfies you guys.

confuzion: You got it! Thanks for the review!

Thank you to kokiro19 and Mokimoki-chan for adding BttB to their faves/alerts list.

* * *

naruto isn't mine.

I do not own the song "Just Keep Breathing" by Automatic Loveletter.

* * *

_italics- flashback_

_**italics bold-song**  
_

* * *

**chapter 20: dire need of talking**

"_Ouch!" I woke up with a head-splitting headache. What happened? I slowly opened my eyes. I'm hung over again. Tch! I should have just stayed away from those drinks like Sakubabe said. _

_When I thought about the pinkette I scowled. It's her fault I was hung over anyway! If she could have just stayed away from- wait a minute? Why are the curtains in my room maroon? I swear it was pink yesterday! Did the servants change it again? I moved and got even more confused, my bed felt different. My hang over doesn't need all this confusion right now. I grabbed my blanket and tried to cover my eyes from the sunlight but abruptly stopped, there was an hourglass-looking emblem on the cloth. Hourglass-Suna, I smiled. I'm dreaming of him again, I guess. Not surprising though because I did go to his birthday party last night. I got pretty trashed too! Everyone, aside from Sakubabe-man she gotta let lose sometimes- got trashed anyway so it was fine. Naruto even stripped in front of Hina, Neji tried to punch him but he, himself could barely stand._

_There was a shuffle to my left and a warm arm embraced me from behind. I stiffened. Oh shit! This isn't my room! Where the hell am I? And why am I naked? ! I tried to move and I felt my muscles complain. My whole body was tired and sore. _

_OH MY GOD! I had shared my bed with somebody last night! Oh shit, I remember now! I had myself drunk to oblivion! I did it because Sakubabe-her smiles and his smiles- had opened Gaa-kun's presents for him again! And he was beside her, smiling as she laughed and showed him the gifts! It was some sort of ritual since we were kids that Sakubabe would open his presents, and I, together with Sasu, would be at the sidelines to glare at them._

_After my nth glass of whatever it was that I drank, I had dragged Sasu and marched towards the gift-opening pair, and stood on front of them all the while holding Sasu's arm. I felt a stab of guilt seeing Sakubabe's hurt expression but the alcohol made me blurt out "We need a room Gaa-kun, which one should we use?" Gaa-kun stood up and swayed, he was most likely as wasted as everyone in the party. I'm not sure what happened next, everything was a blur. He must have pointed us to a room or something. _

_SHIT! Did I lose my virginity to Sasu? Did we really get a room? Oh my God, Sakubabe I'm so sorry! Oh my God I'm such a slut! I have to get out of here before Gaa-kun sees me! Everyone already sees me as a flirt; I don't want __**him**__ to think of me as a slut. A slut who lost her virginity to __**his**__ friend (who smells like __**him**__ and acts like __**him**__) in a room with maroon curtains and Suna-emblemed blankets on the night of __**his **__birthday! I'd be a slut, a slut compared to pure innocent Sakubabe! OH MY GOD I HAVE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE!_

_I tried to remove the arm around my middle I wiggled away. The person behind me groaned and tightened his hold. Wait a minute! That wasn't Sasu's voice? He smells like Sasu but-OH MY GOD!_

"_OH MY GOD!" I covered my mouth after my outburst. He's gonna wake up! I don't want him to wake up! I have to get out of here first! I doubled my efforts for me to escape but the hold he had on me tightened even more. OH MY GOD I AM GOING TO DIEEE!_

"_Quit moving Rinrin, it's too early to get up," OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD. "Rinrin?" OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY-"Rinrin, are you alright?" OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH-"Rinrin, breathe dammit!" he was shaking me already. His hair was messier than usual and I would have wanted to run my fingers on his hair and kiss him like I do in my dreams if I wasn't in panic mode._

"_Gaa-kun?" OH MY GOD! I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO GAA-KUN! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!_

* * *

"_DADDY STOP IT!" I couldn't hold back my tears when Gaa-kun stumbled back after being hit by my father's fist. After the hit, he stood ramrod straight and faced my father, looking him in the eye._

"_To think I TRUSTED you Sabaku!" Daddy was furious and I was shaking. "You WILL MARRY my daughter whether you like it or not!" _

* * *

"_Why are you so quiet?" We were in our garden waiting for my mom. "Gaa-kun? Do you think our friends will be shocked? After all, we're barely fifteen! Don't you think it's too young to get married?" I usually talk to him fine, but today it was hard. I can't find a suitable topic for discussion. I wish Sakubabe was here to break the ice. He looked at me and sighed. I smiled sadly at him, he looked tired. _

"_You don't want to marry me?" What? NO? I want to marry you, you idiot! "I could talk to your father if you are so against this," he stood up and offered me a hand. "I'll handle this, it will be alright."_

_His words confused me but I went along with him. When we got inside, our parents were already there. Our moms were happily planning the wedding, talking about flowers and gowns and grandchildren. Our dads were talking business ventures._

"_We have decided not to get married," all of us turned towards Gaa-kun. What? I gaped at him. _

"_Gaa-kun, wha-" I didn't get to finish my sentence._

"_It's alright Rinrin. We will not get married and no one can make us, we will not be forced into something that we have no intention to do." _

_Few days after that, I was still locked up in my room crying my eyes out. He had no intention of marrying me! Why, am I not good enough for him?_

_Sasubabe came by daily, I don't let her in, so she just sits outside my door and talk to me. I don't know if Gaa-kun told her but that didn't matter. All that matters is that Gaa-kun thinks I am not worthy to be his bride. No male in his right mind would want to marry a woman who jumps willingly into his bed. I cannot believe I did that! I shouldn't have had that much alcohol that night. If I was sober, I would have had kept my hands to myself. I would have been too shy to even kiss him! I've kissed many boyfriends before but Gaa-kun is different, he's special and I love him. He obviously doesn't love me back though. I was just another girl, good to touch and look at and nothing else. I was just a one night stand! Good for one night only! Like a mall sale or something! I'm comparing myself to a mall sale, I'm losing it! ARGGGGGH! _

"_C'mon Karinrin. It's alright. I'm sure he doesn't mean it, whatever it was that he said. You should believe me coz I know, I've had lots of practice from Sasucakes to know these kinds of stuff." Practice? On Sasu? That doesn't sound bad. Maybe I should practice with Sasu so I'd know how to handle Gaa-kun. "And believe me, Raraa is sssssoooooo much better than Sasucakes, if you could handle Sasucakes, Raraa's attitude would be like child's play!" And Sakubabe laughed her laugh when she's thinking of Sasu. I wonder if I laugh like that when I think of Gaa-kun. _

_I stood up and opened the door; she was leaning on it so she fell on the floor. She had bumped the back of her head on the floor but she grinned at me and stood up. "FINALLY! C'mon! Let's go out for some ice cream and chocolates! Sasucakes is waiting for me outside!" Perfect. I'll start practicing now._

* * *

"_Maybe she wasn't a good lay!" Kiba was spouting nonsense again._

"_So you mean to tell me that he cancelled off the wedding because Yachiru was bad in bed? Are you crazy Kiba, why do you always relate things to fornication you perverted mutt!" Sakubabe was shaking him senseless and I had to laugh._

"_Hey! It's true! You girls have your hearts in your chest but I should know that we guys have it somewhere below the belt!" Wait. Wedding, cancelled? OH MY GOD! So that's why Gaa-kun cancelled the wedding! Maybe I was horrible during that __**one time! **__That's it! Well I can remedy that. Mom always told me that practice makes perfect. _

"_I need to practice," I mumbled to myself. _

"_Are you okay Karinrin?" Sakz turned her attention to me and let go of Kiba._

"_I'm okay Babe," I tired to wave off her concern but she was already in front of me. She touched my forehead with the back of her hand._

"_Hehe. Lesbian tendencies," Sakubabe turned around again and glared at our companion._

"_What did you say dogbreath?" I held her arm._

"_Don't hurt him; he has to carry our shopping bags later."_

I sniffed and wiped my tears. I was young and stupid and so in love with _him _that I couldn't think straight. I ended up hurting Sakubabe. I may not act like it but I know. I noticed that I was off her 'special names list'. I was now merely _Karin_-not _Karinrin_. But I couldn't help it, being with Sasu was the only way I could get Gaa-kun to react. He doesn't even give me a glance when I'm alone. If I'm with Sasu, he looks at me, like he's trying to ask me something, and that's the only reaction I get from him, he'd then turn around and take Sakubabe with him, leaving me behind with Sasu-who almost always looks longingly at Sakubabe-when the two of them walk away . But it's better than nothing, I'd settle for that than having him not look at me, and it makes me sick knowing I could never hate her and I could never hate him, no matter how painful it is to see them together, I'd still love the two of them.

I ended up feeling more inferior to Sakubabe too, knowing that she was pure and I was dirty. I don't deserve _him_ anymore; he deserves someone far better than me. He deserves having the best, better than the best even. Sakubabe and Gaa-kun belong with each other. I should just content myself in having the second best, Sasu acts like him anyway. I pretend that Sasu is him all the time, so it's just like having him with me. But given the choice, I'd leave Sasu if Gaa-kun will have me; I'll leave everyone behind if he'd so much as give me a time of the day. The others are merely distractions from my pain of not having _him _anyway. What's the reason for having them all if Gaa-kun would be mine? The pain would subside and everyone would be happy. Everyone BUT Gaa-kun. So, it'll have to stay this way. I have to keep Sasu away from Sakubabe so Gaa-kun would have her, even if it kills me all the time when I see them together. I'd gladly give up my life if it means that Gaa-kun is happy.

I stood up and rubbed my hands. I took a look at my reflection at my little mirror and smiled at myself. I love my eyes. They don't puff like Sakubabe's does post sob fest. Nobody will notice.

I walked towards my _second best _and smirked at his companions. "Sasu! I've been looking all over for you!"

**Change of POV**

The girl on the floor stood up, rubbed her hands together and smiled to her mirror. She then walked confidently towards Uchiha. I looked down at my hands. I should just go over them, punch Uchiha in the face then shout at him to "Make up your godamn mind Uchiha! Do it before you ruin everything! Do it before you damage them further! Do it or I'll fucking kill you!"

Tch! Like I could do it. Rinrin would kill me, not to mention Sakzie. I'd be killed agonizingly slow by two crazily strong and insanely violent girls while my sadistic sister watches and cackles in glee.

That is not the only reason I would not do it though. No, I could not do it, not because I am afraid that they would kill me but because I do not want them to cry because of what I did. Seeing them cry hurts much more than receiving physical blows.

"Raraa? Are you okay?" I looked up and saw that Sakzie was breathing hard from our recent sprint. "I told you to tell her already! Why aren't you telling her yet?"

"What are you talking about Sakzie?" I do not like where this conversation is heading.

"Oh shut up! Don't think I didn't know what happened that time on your fourteenth birthday Raraa! I was the only non-wasted person there," she smiled sadly at me after her loud proclamation. "And I know about the cancelled wed-" This is ridiculous.

"Sakzie, stop," I sighed. I am getting extremely tired of all this. If I help Sakzie with Uchiha, Rinrin would get hurt; every time I _take _Sakzie away from Uchiha, the pinkette gets hurt too. No matter what I do, the two of them get hurt. "What do you want me to do about all this?" I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose to relieve the tension I felt.

She grinned and hugged me again, buried her nose in my shirt and spoke. "Tell her how you feel of course!" And that would really end well. She has no feelings for me. I could still remember her having doubts about our supposed wedding. We were young but I know rejection when I see one. She even got her point across real good by showing everyone that it was Uchiha that she preferred after the wedding incident. If she wanted him, it was fine with me, I'd have never done anything but Sakzie got extremely hurt, so I had to do something. I made it a point to visit Sakzie more often to see if she was alright once a week. I pushed the "Oh shut up Gaara, you visit once a week because you know your precious Rinrin would be there!" thought further back to the recesses of my mind.

Sakzie kept me sane. She is so much like Rinrin that she takes the pain away. I will not allow Uchiha to hurt her. I could hear Rinrin's laugh and see Rinrin's smile through Sakzie. I will protect her, for she's the embodiment of my world, she's my Rinrin personified.

"Ne, Raraa? You think I should practice for tonight's bonfire?" I looked down and saw that Sakzie was thinking of Uchiha again. She looked extremely tired and miserable to a fault.

**Change of POV**

I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

I held the acoustic guitar I had with me and smiled bitterly. It was a gift from _him_. It was black and shiny and it had some sort of a tribal print on the side which looked like three tadpoles meeting at one point. He said he wanted to have a tattoo like it sometime in the future. I snorted. Like Mikoto-san would allow a tattoo artist to touch her precious Sasu-chan.

Thinking about her Sasu-chan made me take a deep breath. I know he's here somewhere; Gai-sensei had gathered all the athletes for the opening activities and made everyone sit around the bonfire. I hope he's here. I made this song for him and I want him to hear it. Though I'd doubt he'd know it's for him. He doesn't understand (or maybe pretends that he doesn't get it) me when I go into my Sasuke-induced depression. This song is the represents all the pain, confusion, hopelessness and loneliness I felt and am feeling and obviously WILL BE feeling in the future. Yey for pathetic me!

I looked around a saw Sai talking with a very excited Sari-chan. I smiled. Sari-chan always liked Sasucakes. No, Sari-chan always liked Sasuke. And Sai looks an awful lot like him. I hope they work out. I san see myself in Sari. I was a bit like her before I became stupid and fell in love with my friend, high spirited and carefree. I miss the old me.

I glanced at my left and saw Raraa staring at the waves hitting the shore. I convinced him to leave his cottage so he could _support _me in my performance. He reluctantly left his room and followed me towards the beach. Behind him was Karin. She was looking at him longingly.

I sighed. Why can't Karin make up her mind? I've noticed her longing looks at Raraa only recently. I thought that she got over their wedding incident, and she chose to move on with Sasuke (HELL YEAH! I said it right this time!). Maybe she was just using the raven to forget Raraa? No, that can't be right. It's supposed to be like this-she was just using ALL her boy toys to forget Raraa. But it's obvious that she couldn't do it, tough luck then. We're on the same boat. We should totally make up a club the-We Need to Seriously Move on Girls Club.

"Forehead!" Somebody sat beside me. It was Ino-Pig. She was wearing a white transparent shirt above her blue bikini. My eyes scanned the crowd for Shika, he was a few steps away and he was holding a sarong. I smiled, I think I know what he's gonna do to that cloth he had with him. "So what song are you gonna sing? Are you-hey! What's the big deal Shika-kun? Get that sarong off me you brute!" I laughed. Shika had just wrapped the sarong around Pig.

Shika sat on Pig's other side and sighed. "Ino, its cold and you are wearing that sorry excuse of a shirt; if one could even call it a shirt. I don't want you to complain about being sick tomorrow."

"Really Shika? Wrapping her in a sarong has nothing to do with the ogling people around us?"Shika's cheeks colored. I cooed at him. "Oh Shika-kun is jealous?" I laughed and looked at Pig. She was trying to hide her smile. She loves it when Shika acts like this; he's jealous but tries hard not to show it. We know him enough to tell he is though. "Awwww Shikaaa! You are so dang cute!" I reached for him but Pig stopped me.

"Hands off biatch! He's mine!" Pig fake-kicked me and the two of us laughed and had a mini-tug-of-war with Shika's arms as our 'ropes'. Shika blushed some more.

"Alrighty my youthful athletes!" Oh! Gai-sensei is starting the program. "Tonight, we will showcase some youthful talents that most of you have aside from your youthful excellence in sports! To start with we have a very beautiful cherry blossom-who is the prettiest beauty according to my youthful student Lee-share with us a song. Haruno Sakura, from the Kunoichis soccer team! Let's give her a round of applause for her youthfulness!"

I stood up and went to the makeshift little stage beside the bonfire. I glanced at my best friend. She was kissing Shika. I sighed. I want my own someone already! I've been waiting long enough as it is!

"GO SAKURA-CHAN!" I glanced to my right and saw Naru with his arm around Hina's shoulder. I smiled at him. Guess Hina's having a grand time.

I sat down the stool and breathed in. "Yo! The song I'm going to sing tonight is entitled Just Keep Breathing, coz if you don't you'll die."

I started strumming and my breath was caught in my throat when I saw obsidian eyes staring at me. _He's _here. _He's _gonna hear my song. I smiled ruefully and started singing.

_**The door slams I wake up  
Another illusion I have made of this  
I cry I swept away every tear that I've cried  
And I swear this was your choice  
So save me from falling  
with the sound of your voice**_

**_Are you lonely? Do you hold back?_**  
**_Will the road ahead keep you on track?_**  
**_I know you made what real for_**  
**_but I can't help but die just a little bit more_**

**_I'll miss your every moment_**  
**_I can't hold it_**  
**_And I swear_**  
**_I'll miss your perfect charming, selfishness_**  
**_I can't say goodbye, say goodbye_**

**_So here goes my last chance_**  
_**I'm an hopeless romantic**_  
_**and I don't understand**_  
_**Why you don't, why you wont show**_  
_**You're dangerously in to me**_  
_**and it's tragic so pathetic**_  
_**I'm in love with you**_  
_**and you just don't get it**_

_**So when you lay your head at night**_  
_**do you think of me?**_  
_**Do you think it's right**_  
_**to leave me here, to kick myself**_  
_**to hate myself for all that I felt?**_

_**I'll miss your every moment**_  
_**I can't hold it**_  
A**_nd I swear_**  
**_I'll miss your perfect charming, selfishness_**  
**_I can't say goodbye, say goodbye_**

**_So I sit here finding a way_**  
**_Surrounded but still lonely_**  
**_Your absence here doesn't help,_**  
**_it doesn't help_**  
**_Cause every time I look to you_**  
**_A mild depression comes screaming through_**  
**_I don't know myself, we don't know ourselves_**

**_So make me this promise, yeah?_**  
**_Say it with an object tone_**  
**_Emotion feeling, can't stop spinning_**  
**_Just keep breathing, say you need me_**

**_I'll miss your every moment_**  
**_I can't hold it_**  
**_And I swear_**  
**_I'll miss your perfect charming, selfishness_**  
**_I can't watch you go, why'd you go?_**

I didn't notice a solitary tear that rolled on my cheeks. I didn't notice everyone staring at me and the person I was looking at.

"_What are you doing?" I was already half asleep when he called. His recent relationship with Karinrin was bothering me to a fault. I couldn't function well and I couldn't tell him I how I felt, so I decided to write about it. I've always been better at self-expression when I write it down. _

"_I'm writing something," I yawned and stretched my limbs. I was talking to him through speaker phone. "Why are you still up Sasucakes? Its past three A.M. Is something bothering you?" Coz if there is, then that makes two of us. Why the hell did you start dating Karinrin formally? Why did it have to be her? _

_He didn't answer me but I could the hear shuffling of his sheets. He's probably in bed already, or his pink couch. I sighed. I guess I'll have to talk again 'til I bore him enough to sleep. Over the years, I've become his 'cure' to his insomnia. He'd call me in the middle of the night and let me talk, he'd just stay quiet and listen, and then about ten minutes of monologue (done by me of course) after, he'd drift to sleep. I could tell by his lack of movement, indicated by the absence of constant shuffling of sheets. When he's trying to sleep, he'd move about twice or thrice every minute and sigh once every five to six minutes. I laughed. I can't believe I memorized his pattern and phases of insomnia signs and symptoms._

"_May I inquire the reason of your sudden laughter Sakz?" Heh. I could practically feel his amusement over the phone. He's probably thinking 'You are crazy Sakz, laughing at nothing in particular. Sober up, I do not want to be infected with your crazy-girly-laugh-disease.'_

_I smiled. I love his voice, especially when he's sleepy. He drawls and it goes much lower than normal. He's less of a bastard too. It's like whatever I'd do, he'd just sigh and say 'Hn.' and let me continue. I love 'sleepy Sasucakes'. I love 'awake Sasucakes' but he has the tendency to turn into 'bastard Sasucakes' when he's awake. He's less inclined to act like a bastard so I'd say 'sleepy Sasucakes' is my favorite, along with 'uncharacteristically-sweet Sasucakes' and 'just-woke-up Sasucakes'. I smiled to myself. No matter what state of mind he's in, I'd still love him. _

_I wrote down on my mini journal 'SAVE ME FROM FALLING WITH THE SOUND OF YOUR VOICE'. I think I'll make this a song or something, and then sing it to his face with tears in my eyes. I wonder of he would 'get it' that time. _

_I smiled again and added 'I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU AND YOU JUST DON'T GET IT'. I am soooooo pathetic!_

"_Godflammit!" There was a chuckle from my phone. I stared at it for a few seconds. I was so lost into thoughts about him that I actually forgot that I WAS talking to him. "Oh, sorry about that Sasucakes. Anyway, I went to the mall this morning. There was a really cute kid running around the toy store. His big brother was chasing after him. He was carrying this big stuffed toy that kinda reminds me of Naru's security object when we were younger. I forgot the name. What was it again? The one with the nine tails? It was the same brand with Raraa's, only Raraa's had one tail," I took a breath and noted that the shuffling was still there. "Anyway, the kid was really cute. When his brother caught him, he sat on the floor and bawled like there was no tomorrow, he was shouting and crying for his brother to buy the toy." _

_I heard him sigh. _

"_I didn't really know if he got the toy because I had to go to mom's favorite bakeshop to buy her bread. I don't know why she likes eating bread from there. I mean, why eat bread when you can have chocolates as snacks right?"_

I smiled sadly. I miss our insomnia nights. I miss our mini-fights. I miss our movie nights. I miss our arguments. I miss our pink-couch bonding. I miss our walks. I miss our everything.

I miss you Sasucakes. I miss you so much it hurts.

"That's my Sakura-chan!" Naru's shout made me come back to reality. Everyone was clapping and I saw Ino and Tennie (she arrived with Nej while I was singing I think) share a look of astonishment. I told them I would sing it to him someday! Eat that biatches! I looked as Naru's direction and he and Hina smiled at me.

I stood up and walked towards our group, dragging Raraa and Karin with me.

"That was epic babe! Didn't know you had it in you? You made that song up?" I glanced at Karin, then at Raraa. These two really NEED to talk.

"Know what Karin-" I stopped when the other hand I was holding squeezed mine. Fine, fine I'll shut up. Karin raised an eyebrow. "Nevermind. It was nothing."

"FOREHEAD! I am so proud of you!" No later than five seconds, Pig already jumped at me. "That was that was-waaaahhhh! That was-oh you know what I mean already so I don't have to say it!" We shared a look and I told her through my eyes that I was not fine so she should save me already. "Ahmm. Can you guys excuse us? I need to have a girl talk with my best friend."

We were about to leave when somebody held my hand. "No," I stiffened and glared at Ino. If she won't take me away I am going to kill her! "You two are not leaving," I turned around and looked at our interlaced hands. My fingers look so little compared to his. "You and I need to talk Sakz."

Just kill me already!

* * *

Who's POV would you like next chap? ^_^


	21. back to basics

Whoah! I had lots of reviews! It's been more than a week since I last opened my account and I was surprised upon seeing lots of notifs in my inbox!

I apologize for the long wait!

young-love: Sorry it took me so long to update. I hope that cliffie didn;t upset you! Thanks for the review! ^_^

EndlessFlame: You changed your pen-name! The 991 disappeared ^_^

I'm sooo glad you reviewed! A chapter wouldn't be the same without it.

You're right when you said "So, let me get this straight: Karin loves Gaara, but is trying to get Gaara and Sakura together. Gaara...is confused, I'm guessing, and is trying to get Sakura and Sasuke together, Sakura is still in a depression, Sasuke is being an idiot, and Sai has disappeared." Except for the last part that is.

Yeah, 'better than the best' was the most mentioned phrase in the chap. Everyone wants everyone to have their own 'better than the best' but as you said it, they are doing it in all the wrong ways.

It's really okay to feel lazy, I feel lazy almost everyday of my life so it's nothing new to me.

More Sasuke coming right up! Thanks for sticking around!

xiamesee: OMG! Really? That would be delightful! I would really like to see a drawing/picture of them with Saku hugging Sasu from behind, wherein you could see Saku crying and with Sasu's head down and his bangs covering his eyes *kinda like a scene wherein Saku stops Sasu from leaving, I think I have a scene in this chapter that kind of depicts it*

I do hope you still feel like drawing them though. I'm afraid it took me so long to update, and you might not be up for it anymore, I really hope you still feel like drawing them!

Wow! You consider my writing brain food? You made me grin like crazy! Thank you! ^_^

BadassAlec: Sorry for the cliffie. I hope you won't hate me by the end of this chap! *-*

They will talk eventually, but right now my mind is travelling a lot and I couldn't write a decent conversation. *scratches head* I apologize, sorry in advance. Anyways, thanks for the review!

illneverknow: I could say the feeling is mutual, by this, I mean that I also get pretty excited when I see a review from you! ^_^

You're right! It was Sasu who grabbed her! And I also think Gaara and Karin would have cute little redheads taking after them.

They still don't talk this chap. Just a little "intro" of what's to come. I tried writing "the talk" here but it didn't come out right, I lacked inspiration because I haven't been out much lately, I feel like my brain is turning to mush because of its current inactive lifestyle.

As always, your review made me smile! Thank you! ^_^

confuzion: I really hope they do! ^_^ Thanks for the review!

MyLifeInWhole: Yey! Thank you! I love hearing from you guys! It makes me smile a silly smile and write more. ^_^

Mokimoki-chan: This chap is kinda like an intro to said confrontation. I think the "real" confrontation would be next chapter.

I know right? They're both redheads and I personally think Karin's attitude/personality *in this story, at least* compliments Gaara's. Thanks for the review! ^_^

White(dot)Rose(dot)Didi: Sorry for "murdering" your pen name. I mentioned it before that I don't know how to post dots here without it disappearing; I still don't know how to do it until now. Sorry!

One Sasuke POV coming right up! Thanks for thereview! ^_^

woodbyne: OMG have I told you how much I adore your reviews? My favorite line on it was "No wonder Sakura and Karin practically switched men", I loved how you stated it. ^_^

I wouldn't agree with you being right seldom times, you're right in almost all of your "predictions" here! And I love your 'I-think-you-deserve-better-than-me-and-don't-want-me-so-I'm-going-to-let-you-go-even-though-you-want-me-more-than-anything-and-I-just-don't-know-it' group. It describes them perfectly! And the 'Aww, Skika is such a good boyfriend! (now why can't Gaara and Sasuke follow his lead and go serenade the girls they love?)' made me smile. It would be funny *but extremely sweet* if those two stoic guys actually do it. I think I'm gonna let one of them do it before this story ends. ^_^

Yep, Sari is Sai's gift! Both of them are going away and have their happily ever after earlier than everyone in the story. ^_^

Waaahh! Godflammit got stuck with you guys! Sooooo happy! *biggest grin evah!*

And Sasu kind of dissects the song here, so it would be safe to say that he finally 'gets it'.

This chap is a happy chap; next chap would be different though. It would have lots of angst (if it goes according to planned, I already have the rough draft; I still have to edit it though).

As usual, you got my 'ninjaness' again! Two thumbs up for you! Thanks for the wonderful review!

krtkuchiha: Wow, good going! They owe you a big one then! I'd assume that you'd be a godparent for their future children? hehe

WAAAHHH! For real? OSCARS? You made me giggle and jump around when I read your review! Thank you soooo much!

I never thought my 'godflammit' would actually _do _that! Waaah! I'm really happy!*biggest grin evah!*

Yep, there are FOUR ignorant idiots now. All four of them are 'love fools'.

You got the curse mark thingie on the guitar! Yey for you!

And yes, not only do I like your review, I actually love it! thanks for making a stressed out girl smile! ^_^

Kate Uchiha: Awesome? Waaahhh! I love you guys to bits! Thank you!

I totally agree with your review. I'll make them tell themselves (that doesn't sound right, does it?lol).

Yeah, Karin never really thought (or of she did, she tossed the thought away) that she'd end up hurting lots of people when she started 'practicing' on Sasu, man, the things a person would do for love.

Thanks to peppermintginger, White(dot)Rose(dot)Didi, Eclairhanson, young-love, for adding BttB to their faves/alerts list.

* * *

naruto isn't mine.

* * *

_italics-flashback_

_italics underlined: __ (sentences spoken in the past)_

**_bold italics-song_**

* * *

**Chapter 21: back to basics**

Where the hell are you? Why the hell can't I find you?

"Teme, I'm going out," the Dobe was at the door when I stood up.

"Where are you going?" I followed him outside. I looked around for the nth time. Where the hell is she? Is she hiding or something?

The Dobe huffed. "The bonfire of course! Sakura-chan is gonna sing and I wanna be there and cheer her on!" Sing? Sakz is going to sing? It's been years since I last saw her touch her guitar.

"_Sasucakes? I made something last night, wanna hear it?" Sakz was strumming the guitar I gave her last summer. She was smiling and she looked hopeful. I wanted to humor her but a family issue if currently holding my attention. _

_Father is home today. I have to go home early. He called to tell me that he wanted an audience at his study this evening. Nii-san mentioned that Father wanted to tell me something important. I wonder what it is. Is he going to give me something to do? Like go to one of the companies to troubleshoot things. So I could prove to him and everyone else that I was worth to be called and Uchiha, that I could be as good as my aniki. Nii-san had proven to everyone that he could handle the stress of being a head of the company when he was fourteen. I am going to turn fifteen this year. Yes, maybe that's what Father wants to talk about. _

_All this tension is giving me a headache. _

"_Sasucakes? Sasucakes are you alright?" I heard somebody sigh. "It's okay, I won't sing alright? I'm sorry if I bothered you, it's just that, well it's kinda special and I wanted you to hear it. If you don't want to hear it then it's alright," I looked up and saw that she was sadly looking at her guitar. "Hey, I gotta go. I won't bother you again with my songs, I know you have lots of things to think of and do rather than listen to my annoying songs," she stood up and walked away. _

_Was it me or was that really a teardrop on her cheek?_

_Maybe I should just go home already. But Sakz wants to stay here for sure. She is probably waiting for the Sabakus to arrive. Tch! I have to stay to make sure that redhead doesn't do anything inappropriate._

"_Teme you bastard! What did you do? You made Sakura-chan cry again? What is your problem man? She just wanted you to hear her song!" What? She's crying again?_

"_What are you talking about Dobe?" The stupid blonde looked confused at first. Then his face brightened._

"_Man you are lame! What did you say to her this time?" He was laughing his ass off._

"_Say? I didn't even say anything!" Why the hell is she crying this time?_

_The dobe laughed more. "You didn't even SAY anything and you MADE her cry! Man, you're THE lamest person I know!"_

I seem to have a talent in hurting Sakz. I don't even have to talk and I make her cry. Should I do this? Can I DO this? What if I hurt her more? What if instead of making her happy, I would end up making her sad?

I walked around and found myself on the bonfire. People were starting to cheer for somebody. I looked up and saw Sakz on stage.

_**The door slams I wake up  
Another illusion I have made of this  
I cry I swept away every tear that I've cried**_

_**And I swear this was your choice  
So save me from falling  
with the sound of your voice**_

Do I deserve you Sakz? Now that I know that I have hurt you all these years? I have made you cry millions of times without even knowing it.

_**Are you lonely? Do you hold back?  
Will the road ahead keep you on track?  
I know you made what real for  
but I can't help but die just a little bit more**_

I don't know if I could make you happy. All I know is that you make ME happy; I have known this for the longest time but I never once thought that I've made you sad. I wanted you around me because you brighten up my world, I didn't know that me being around you darkens up your world. Why did I not notice? You were always there. Even at times wherein I push you away, you always come back to me. There were times that I was a complete bastard but you just smile and tell me you would always be there, that you would never ever leave me. Why are you not here now? Have you had enough if me?

_**I'll miss your every moment  
I can't hold it  
And I swear  
I'll miss your perfect charming, selfishness  
I can't say goodbye, say goodbye**_

Goodbye? You're going to leave me? But you promised. You promised me.

"_Are you alright Sasucakes?" I was sitting beside my bed with my head on my bent knees. Father and Mother are going to London with Itachi to seal a multi-million dollar deal with an English man. I am quite sure that they would be gone for weeks again. The house will be empty and I will be all alone again. _

_I hate it when I'm alone. It's too quiet, like there's no one there to hear me when I call. I hate noise but I loathe silence. And when I'm alone in our house, the silence is deafening. I feel so alone._

"_Sasucakes? It's alright. I'm here. I'll stay til Kaa-chan calls me to go home." _

_I hate being alone. I hate it. Why do people always leave me? My family is not home almost all the time, why can't they take me with them? Am I not good enough? Don't they miss me?_

"_It's alright. They don't want to leave you but they have to. Mikoto-san wants you to have a normal life Sasucakes. I don't know what will happen if Fugaku-san would turn you into a second Itachi. Tachi-nii is nice but I have a really bad feeling that he'd snap anytime! If he goes nuts then I'd blame it on Fugaku-san," I sighed. It's a relief that Sakz is here. She always seems to know how I feel without me telling it to her, and she appears just when I need her most. _

_She says the right things at the right time. She also does the right things with perfect timing to my needs._

_I felt a head leaning on my shoulder. I took a glance to my right and saw pink locks. I smiled. Sakz hair really smells nice. She sighed and took hold of my arm and hugged it. I inhaled and smiled. I don't even need to talk and she already knows what to do._

_She holds me like I'm the one who's precious, but it's just the other way around. She always said that she was lucky to have me but I always thought that I will always be the lucky one. I am lucky to have her in my life. _

"_Don't worry, you won't get lonely. Unlike them, I'd NEVER leave you!" As long as I have her, I could face the world. As long as I have her, I would be invincible. _

She is good for me. No she is the best, better than the best. But I am not good for her. She said it herself, I wasn't healthy for her. I might end up hurting her again. But I don't know what will happen to me if I lose her, my life would not be complete without her.

You can't leave me Sakz. I will do whatever it takes to keep you with me.

_**So here goes my last chance  
I'm an hopeless romantic  
and I don't understand  
Why you don't, why you wont show  
You're dangerously in to me  
and it's tragic so pathetic  
I'm in love with you  
and you just don't get it**_

I get it now. At least I think I do. If you would only talk to me then we could clear things out. Why are you avoiding me Sakz? All this chasing is giving me a headache, a really bad headache, not to mention the painful tugs I feel on my chest each time you ignore me. What does this mean? I have an idea but I'm not keen on admitting it yet.

_**So when you lay your head at night**_  
_**do you think of me?**_  
_**Do you think it's right**_  
_**to leave me here, to kick myself**_  
_**to hate myself for all that I felt?**_

I'm sorry. I am terribly sorry for making you feel like this. If only I could turn back time I would have prevented this from happening.

Did you hate yourself because of me? Am I worth all this pain Sakz? All I do is make you cry, make you hurt.

And yes, I think of you. I never realized until now, you are the last person I think about just before I succumb to sleep. I think about how you are doing, if you are already asleep or still crying about some silly thing I have done the morning before we parted ways. I always decide before I go to bed that I would make or trick the Dobe into buying you your favorite ice cream and milk chocolates the next day.

When I suffer insomnia, your voice alone would make me content enough to leave wakefulness. I'd sleep with a smile on my face and wake up well rested and energized.

Our little fights always make me smile each time I think about it. I think about how your nose crinkles when you think and how you crane your head to your right when you're confused. I love how you lean your head on my shoulder because it allows me to smell your hair without anyone noticing. I love hearing you laugh and I love seeing you smile.

_**I'll miss your every moment  
I can't hold it  
And I swear  
I'll miss your perfect charming, selfishness  
I can't say goodbye, say goodbye  
**_

_**So I sit here finding a way  
Surrounded but still lonely  
Your absence here doesn't help,  
it doesn't help  
Cause every time I look to you  
A mild depression comes screaming through  
I don't know myself, we don't know ourselves**_

I know. You have told me that a million times but I fooled myself into thinking that you were not serious. I could not bring myself to believe that you have feelings for me Sakz! How could you have those feelings for me? You are everything a guy could ever want, I can't have you. I am nothing; even my own father is ashamed of me. You can't possibly want me. I have been nothing but a bastard to you. Why do you even want to be associated with me?

"_Don't leave Sasucakes," Sakz was crying. I had decided that I would transfer to Sound Academy. They had changed their curriculum into something that would help me achieve business acumen in a short span of time. Leaf Academy has it but I have to graduate high school first. I do not want to wait a few more years. I wanted to be great and I wanted it now._

"_Why not Sakz? What does this school have to offer me?" She looked at me with tears in her eyes. I turned around. I hate seeing her cry. _

"_Sasucakes you can't leave! It wouldn't be the same without you here," I didn't look back. Her tears make me uncomfortable._

"_You still have the Dobe and the others Sakz. Trust me, my absence wont even affect your daily routine," hearing her sobs felt like a knife was stabbing my throat. I hate this feeling. Why am I feeling this?_

"_Yeah, I'd be surrounded but I'd still be lonely," she hugged me from behind and cried on my back. I felt her tears seep into my shirt. I inhaled. I felt like something was suffocating me. "__If you were to stay here with me, there would be no regrets... because every day we'd do something fun, we'd be happy I swear! I would do anything for you! So please just stay with me!_" _I inhaled again. The painful tugs in my chest started up again. _

"_You are annoying Sakz."_

But I didn't leave. I didn't leave because I didn't want you to feel lonely. I didn't want to hurt you. But I ended up hurting you more. Why had I ignored this before? Why did I allow myself to believe that the hurt looks you were giving me meant nothing?

I was so scared that I would end up hurting you myself once we get involved with each other that I had pretended not to see what you were showing me. Years of pretense eventually became a reality. I ended up believing that you did not want me. I was so certain that I would not be good for you, that I would just end up ruining you that I fooled myself into thinking that having Karin was good enough. Seeing you in Karin was good enough. Being with Karin was as close as I could get to having you; you are so alike in numerous aspects anyway, being with her was like being with you. I didn't want to ruin you Sakz.

_**So make me this promise, yeah?  
Say it with an object tone  
Emotion feeling, can't stop spinning  
Just keep breathing, say you need me**_

**_I'll miss your every moment_**  
**_I can't hold it_**  
**_And I swear_**  
**_I'll miss your perfect charming, selfishness_**  
**_I can't watch you go, why'd you go?_**

Is it me you want Sakz? Is it Sai? Or Sabaku perhaps? FUCK! This stupid second guessing is turning into a major clusterfuck of a situation! What am I supposed to do with Sabaku and Karin? Sai is taken cared of already. Nii-san's introduction of Sari to him seems like a good way to start his recuperation. But Sabaku is different. We would end up eventually slicing each others throats!

The cheers around me woke me up from my internal debate. I saw Sakz dragging Sabaku and Karin towards the others. I moved amidst the crowd and approached them.

"Ahmm. Can you guys excuse us? I need to have a girl talk with my best friend," I had arrived just in time to grab Sakz hand. Ino glanced at me and at Sakz who was alternating between staring at our linked fingers and glaring at the blonde.

"No," I held Sakz hand a little tighter when she stiffened. You are not getting away this time Sakz. "You two are not leaving," she turned around and stared at our interlaced fingers again. "You and I need to talk Sakz," she groaned and I almost smiled. It was so like Sakz to groan at a time like this.

**Change of POV**

Just kill me already!

Oh my god I am going to diiieeee! Ino you pig! Help me! What kind of best friend are you? Rescue me biatch! It's your duty to rescue me!

"Uchiha, where are you taking her?" Raraa! Thank you! Thank you! Please save me? I cannot handle this right now!

"Yeah Teme, where are you taking Sakura-chan?" Oh my God Naru I love you so much! But I'd love you more if you ahmm grab me from Sasucakes aw-godflammit!- grab me from Sasuke and help me run away! "You aren't going to take advantage of her will you?" What? Naru are you crazy? "Cos if you will I will kill your pale ass to wind country and back!"

I heard somebody laugh. I looked around and saw Karin holding her stomach. I gaped at her. It's been years since I saw her smile a real smile, much more laugh a real laugh, I was so used to seeing her smirk from time to time that I had forgotten how alike we sounded when she laughed.

"Rinrin?" I looked at Raraa and smiled. He called her Rinrin again. I wanted to hug Raraa but when I tried to move towards him, the grip on my hand tightened even more. "May I inquire why you were humored?" Raraa looked happy. Oh this is so going to be good! I will make them talk even if it's the last thing I do!

"Huh?" Karin! Oh my God get your act together girl! Don't go all lovestruck-girl-in-front-of-her-loved-one mode now! That would be just SAD! Talk to him! Arrggghh! She was still gaping at Raraa!

This isn't going to work. Sasucakes is holding my hand and it looks like he has no plan of letting go, Karin looks like she wanted to faint, Raraa looks confused, everyone around us was gaping and I wanted to scream in frustration.

"WAHHHHHHH! KARINRIN WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING?" oh shit! I DID scream! I covered my mouth with my hands. I smelled something nice and when I realized the fact I jumped. Sasucakes was still holding my hand and the nice fragrance that I smelled was the soap that he used. "Sorry," I looked down again. This is going nowhere.

"Babe? Are you alright?" I shook my head at Karin's query. How the hell can I be alright? The guy holding my hand will probably kill me for hurting him last Monday.

"Know what you guys, you are all IDIOTS!" I looked up and saw Tennie almost fuming. She was being held back by a smiling Nej.

"Calm down Ten. Let them resolve this by themselves," Nej smiled at me and then looked at Sasuke (HELL YEAH! I said it right!) pointedly. "What are you going to do now Sasuke? Do we need to give you another push?" I glanced at _him _and saw that he was shaking his head. Push? What push? "Alright, what about you Gaara what are you going to do?" Nej turned his attention on the redheads.

"I do not need said pushing Neji. I am merely awaiting Sakzie's decision," decision? What the hell is Raraa talking about? This is really confusing.

"Decision? What are you talking about Raraa?" I tilted my head to the side and looked at him.

"Are you going with Uchiha or not? If you do not want to go with him and he forces you, I would gladly slice up one part of his anatomy for you," ahmmnn. No Raraa just no. I heard somebody let out an angry growl before I felt the hand holding mine tense up. I held it with my other hand. _He _calmed down, squeezed my hand a little and sighed.

I smiled. He said something to me before. That I calm him down or something like that.

We were at the Uchiha mansion and Tachi-nii had, and I quote "_violated my privacy you sadistic good for nothing bastard!_" unquote. Which was answered with a rather smug smirk and I quote, "_It is not my fault that the door that is supposed to protect said privacy of yours is open foolish little brother. And bear in mind that mother will hear of her beloved baby Sasu-chan calling her a bitch_," unquote.

Sasucakes was furious as hell and Tachi-nii was having the time of his life. At least that's what I thought. To others he may have looked disinterested but I could see the faint twitch of his lips, signaling that he was having fun poking at Sasucakes' anger buttons. I held Sasucakes hand and told him, "_Sasucakes? I do not like this. I want to watch my movie and I want to watch it now. Do you want to join us Tachi-nii? We're watching A Walk to Remember. I have fake butterfly tattoos too; I could put it in your shoulder like I do to Sasucakes!_" Tachi-nii had exited the room in a blink of an eye. I was laughing so hard that my stomach hurt. Sasucakes then squeezed my hand and had said _"__When I'm about to lose control, how do you patiently hold my hand and gently calm me down?__"_

I smiled at the memory.

I don't know how I do it Sasucakes. It just happens. You get pissed, I calm you down. Just like how you ease my worries when I'm scared. It just happens.

"It's alright Raraa, I can handle this," at least I think I can. Should I just DO this? I don't wanna do it. I don't wanna talk to him YET.

"Sakz," his voice was thick with something I couldn't point out. Dread? Anxiety? Loneliness? "Can we PLEASE talk?" Please?

"Is it me or is the mighty Uchiha saying PLEASE?" I finally looked him in the eye and smiled. He looked immensely relieved and extremely tired at the same time. He smiled a small teensy weensy smile. He still looked miserable though. I'd have to say he looked like hell. His eyes were baggy and had circles around them. "Wacha wanna talk about Uchiha?" His smile disappeared and he frowned at me. I laughed at his expression.

Alright! I will do this! I can do this! I will tell him that I love him and because he can't love me back, I would let him go. I'll let him go even if it would kill me. It's alright, I'm happy as long as he's happy. And I would do this smiling too! Crying can wait til I'm alone. I'll show him that I'm fine so he won't hate himself if he hurts me.

I love you Sasucakes. I love you so much it hurts. But I know you probably don't need me in your life. So I'll face you with a smile. Tell you I love you and let you go. I can do it. I will do it. I sighed and faced our friends.

"We gotta go guys. See ya later alligators!" I smiled brightly at them. Ino-pig was looking at me worriedly, Karin was looking at me and was smiling (not smirking! She was smiling!), Tennie looked relieved and Hina was blushing beside Naru.

I tugged _his _hand and pulled. "Let's go Uchiha," he grunted and I laughed again. I can DO this! I can do this smiling too!

**Change of POV**

She's laughing! Forehead is laughing! "Is this for real?" Somebody groaned and I realized that I was squeezing Shika-kun's arm a little too hard. "Sorry Shika-kun."

"What are you worried about?" He sighed and hugged me from behind. I raised my head and saw that he was closing his eyes. I smiled. He had been complaining for a while. He wanted to go to bed a few hours ago but I wouldn't let him.

"It's Forehead. I have a feeling she's having a temporary high," he nodded. "I don't want her to crash again Shika-kun!" I whispered. "If that happens, I swear I am going to bitch slap that stupid Uchiha!" Shika-kun chuckled and I felt him kiss my hair.

"Don't worry, Sakura is _experienced _when it comes to Sasuke, she'll handle him just fine," I held his arms in my middle and huffed.

"What if she'll crash? What will I do?" That stupid Uchiha _will _get it if that happens! "I hate it when she goes all emo and I can't do anything! You know how she gets when Sasuke breaks her! It'll take days before she goes back to normal!"

"Ino, you've been best friends since what, grade school? Trust me, you'll know exactly what to do when that happens," he smelled my hair and I sighed. "Now, can we please, please go to bed?"

I was about to answer him when we heard somebody laugh. I whipped my head towards Karin. She was laughing her heart out.

"FINALLY!" She was raising her hand while laughing. This is getting ridiculous! First, Forehead didn't turn into a big pile of pathetic-love-struck-fool complete with a severe case of pseudo hyperventilation and cold fingers and teary eyes in front of Sasuke, then Karin laughs her heart out. Karin almost never laughs. She doesn't even smile! She does when we were younger but as we grew older, her smiles were rather rare. "Man I haven't laughed like that in ages!" Come to think of it, I've always thought that her laughter kinda sounds like Forehead's. "Sasu FINALLY, finally did it! It took him what, like more than a decade? Sakubabe will FINALLY, finally have her happy ending!" Did Karin just say that? What? Isn't she supposed to be like Sasuke's on and off girlfriend? Why does it sound like she's happy now that Forehead is having _the talk _with Sasuke? Isn't she supposed to be mad or something?

"Ahmmmmm. Is something wrong you guys? Naruto close you mouth, you look like a blonde fish gaping. Goldfish! You look like a goldfish blondie! Oh my god Shika you're awake! It's a miracle!" Wait a minute? Is Karin alright? She starting to sound like Sakura! Well, she _did _act kinda like Forehead before but its been years since she acted like this.

Gaara chuckled and I gaped at them. Gaara was looking at Karin the same way Sasuke looks at Forehead when she does something stupid. Oh shit! No freaking way! Don't tell me!

"You get it now Babe?" I jumped when Shika-kun whispered in my ear. I rolled my eyes at him. I hate it when he calls me that, it makes me feel fat, like that pig in that movie with the same title.

"Shut up pineapple head!" I whispered back. My lazy boyfriend chuckled and held me tighter.

"KARIN! You're back!" Naruto's shout made me look at Gaara again. He was smiling. This is rich! I cannot believe I didn't notice it before!

"Shika-kun, why didn't you tell me!" I elbowed him non too gently.

He grunted and sighed. "You hate it when I discover something before you do, I didn't tell you simply for the purpose of self-preservation."

**Change of POV**

"FINALLY!" I raised my arms for emphasis and laughed. "Man I haven't laughed like that in ages!" I shook my head. "Sasu FINALLY, finally did it! It took him what, like more than a decade? Sakubabe will FINALLY, finally have her happy ending!" Naru's comment about Sasu taking advantage made me laugh some more. It would be the other way around! Sakubabe will be the one to take advantage of Sasu. All those pent up emotions will burst and Sasu won't have a chance!

Is it me or is it a little quiet? I looked around and everyone was gaping at me. What? What did I do this time?

"Ahmmmmm. Is something wrong you guys? Naruto close you mouth, you look like a blonde fish gaping. Goldfish! You look like a goldfish blondie! Oh my god Shika you're awake! It's a miracle!" Somebody beside me chuckled. I glanced sideways and froze. It was Gaa-kun.

"KARIN! You're back!" I looked at Naruto confused. What the hell is he talking about? "You're starting to sound like Sakura-chan again!" Huh? "You change your topics faster than a bullet again, and you're laughing!" Ahmmm. What? Have you gone mad? "It's true!" Whatever Naruto. tch!

"Are you alright Karin? I mean, with all this?" I glanced at Hina. She was blushing prettily beside Naruto. "With Sasuke-san talking with-" she didn't finish her statement and sighed.

"With Sakubabe and Sasu talking?" Everyone around us nodded. It would be alright if Gaa-kun is okay with it. I glanced back at him, he was smiling. It looks like he's having a grand time too. I guess he's okay with it. "I guess so. Everyone knows they were meant for each other right?" They all gaped at me again. What is it with them and all this gaping?

"Then why the hell were you always sticking with him? You made Forehead cry you selfish biatch!" Oh right. Ino doesn't know. I did it coz of Gaa-kun! But I can't tell her that right now can I? Gaa-kun is here and it's too complicated to put it in a single sentence. We would need like a day to cover it all up!

"Can we talk for a bit Ino?" I moved towards her but somebody stopped me. I looked behind me and saw Gaa-kun. He was holding my shoulder. "Ahmmm," I am officially speechless. I inhaled and closed my eyes. I miss this, I miss his smell, I miss his touch. I miss all of him.

"O-kaaay! We gotta go Karin! Bye Gaara! Let's go you guys!" Ino was gathering everyone up to leave. Kiba was grinning and raising two thumbs up! Stupid mutt!

Oh shit! All of them are leaving! "Hey you guys wait for me!" I moved to follow them but Gaa-kun spoke.

"Rinrin?" I looked back at him and breathed in deep. "Can we talk?" I shook my head no. I don't want to talk. I don't want to get hurt, I don't want you to tell me that you love Sakubabe and you are finally giving up because Sasu FINALLY made his move. "Why not?"

Why not? Yeah Karin, why not? Why the hell can't the two of you talk?

Argh! I'm talking to myself again!

"Because I don't want to?" I answered with more uncertainty that I wanted to show. That was the only reason I could think of as of now. He looked unconvinced and he stepped towards me. I stepped back. He advanced towards me again and I resumed my cowardly way and took numerous steps away from him.

We only stopped when I felt my back hit something solid. I glanced behind me and saw a brick wall. Great! Just great. I am trapped! TRAPPED I tell ya!

I returned my glance in front and immediately raised my face. Gaa-kun placed both his arms beside my head. Oh shit! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!

"Oh my God!" I couldn't help but gasp out. I covered my mouth with my hand immediately after I blurted it out and I am a hundred percent sure that my eyes were as wide as flying saucers! Why the hell is Gaa-kun so close? I am going to diieee!

Gaa-kun emitted chuckles at first, it then slowly turned into laughter. I gaped at him. Is he laughing at me?

"All right. I'll give in for now. But when everything is settled, I'll find you. And you cannot do anything to stop me Rinrin," he leaned down and my breathe was caught in my throat. He smiled a small smile before dropping a small kiss on my forehead. "I missed you Rinrin, welcome home."

* * *

I apologize for the long wait. As you all know, I got sick and when I finally got better, my cousin gave birth to a very beautiful baby girl! I had to accompany them in the hospital because I was the only one to handle late nights/dawn without passing out.

Who's POV do you want next chap? I want it to be in Itachi's POV but I don't think it would work.

I'll have lots of flashbacks next chap so be ready for a little angst. ^_^

Thank you for reading and please leave a review! ^_^


	22. almost there

*To everyone who read this before I realized how stupid I was, I'm so sorry. I was so excited to get this posted that I didn't bother to check it. When I read the preview, my eyes almost crossed at the last part. It was all jumbled up and everything. So I had to delete the chap again and repost it. I apologize.*

Alrighty! This chapter is an all-Saku POV. You know how fast her mood changes so don't get shocked about the turn of events here. ^_^

It's like a finale on its own. But I think I still have a chapter set in Sasu's POV during their _talk._ Then I'm contemplating on putting an epilogue or something-I really, really wanted to have Itachi's POV before I end this so I think I'll have an all-Itachi POV for my epilogue, not so sure if I could do it though, life is pretty tough on me lately, I hate you reality, I hate you!

Anyway, enough about my love-hate relationship with reality. I want to give a warm thank you to those who reviewed!

illneverknow: Guess what? You made me grin like crazy again! You actually shed some tears? I'm so happy!

No worries on the date and time of your review, as long as you do actually tell me how the chapter went then its more than enough to make me want to write more.

Your reviews are very very very well appreciated! Love you to bits and pieces! ^_^

p.s. Me, a genius? Oh my God I love you so much! Thank you!

LilyVampire: Really? I'm happy my story actually sort of ahmm 'happens' in real life, its good to know that others relate to it.

So, what happened to that "guy" that you loved? Sorry if I'm prying too much. I was born a very very curious child. ^_^

Thanks for the review!

krtkuchiha: I danced on my chair while I read your review-well not really dancing but I did a sort of sway from side to side while grinning. My mom looked at me strangely so I caught myself, my eyes widened like saucers, I stopped my movement and slapped my forehead. You made me sooo happy!

Your review was more than a compliment! Thank you!

This chap has another internal debate but it would be Saku this time. Don't worry, you don't need to hit her because before she jumped to the wrong decision, Sasu finally stopped all nonsense and put some sense into their senselessness-oh no, I think I'm making no sense at all. See what your reviews do to me my beloved readers? But keep 'em coming, I don't mind looking stupid sometimes.

Yep! Raara loves the Rinrin who laughs and smiles a lot. And he's happy that she finally came to her senses and transformed back to her original self.

Our new angel's name is Chelmonde Staffaniah. She's really really small but her voice suggests otherwise. Once she's hungry, everyone in the house would know. lol

Kate Uchiha: Yep, she sounded insane alright. Karin and Saku sort of have a very mild case of bipolar disease, they's cry like there's no tomorrow one minute then laugh their hearts out the next. That's why our two stoic guys love them, they could express themselves without fear of judgment from others. Unlike them, who watch everything they say and do because they carry the burden of being watched by vultures due to their strict fathers.

I'm happy I made you laugh. ^_^

I want my own personal-Sasuke-slave too! But yeah reality hates us.

I tried making Sasu and Saku make out but I went "WTH if I was one of my readers I'd stop reading completely, I suck so bad it isn't even funny!" so yeah. But I tried, I really did! *-*'

Thanks a bunch for letting me hear/read your thoughts!

woodbyne: My friend once told me that it was my duty as her friend, to save her from awkward situations like what happened to Saku, she sort of gives me a short briefing each time we see/meet her crush/love, I laughed so hard when I remembered it that I just had to include it in the story. She's such a demanding little thing that I want to strangle her most of the time.

Sasuke-the-emotionally-repressed-douche-bag-who-can't-see-what-he-is-doing-to-his-best-friend doing. Now that's a title. I love it! It would be too long to wear it in his forehead though so maybe one of his friends-Naru most probably would make some sort of code, he'd make it "StERDBwcSwhiDthBF" and write it in pemanent ink on Sasu's forehead if he could have his way. That would be hilarious because Sasu wouldn't know what hit him,and he wouldn't understand what all those letters mean!

You are absolutely right. That's like their main problem. Because all of them got it right the first time but eventually over-analyze the situation and get it wrong. I guess lots of smart people do that most of the time. And instead of making the right choice, they make the wrong ones.

I totally agree with the slow blinking and cloudy eyes! I've seen it like lots of times and I laugh my ass off each time I do. My friends usually get back at me later when it is I, who'll be the lovestruck-girl-in-front-of-her-loved-one mode so its only fair. Man, I miss being in school and crushing on all the cute boys! ^_^

It might be obvious enough but I'll say it too. I totally love Itachi! That's why you guys could see snippets of him (and Shikamaru and Kiba) in most of the chaps. I squeeze him in if having his POV don't work. I love him that much!

I love how you quote something from the chap and then sort of dissect it, it makes me smile and then go "yeah woodbyne, you are absolutely correct!" Like the calming down and stuff. Yep, if I was a male and somebody would threaten my "big little guy" down down there, It would take more than a few people to stop me. But Sasu has an off button and Saku knows where it is, so Sasu doesn't have a choice but to calm down. WAaaahhh! I wanna have my own Sasuke, minus the bastard persona and his over possessive tendencies.

"I love how she still makes the mistake of calling him Sasucakes, and then swears because of it. It is so realistic, cuz I mean, if you've been calling someone a nickname for years, it's gonna take a while for you to stop, no matter how much you want to." My favorite part of the review! I personally think so too. You got how deep Saku's feelings are, and Sasucakes isn't just a name but a trademark, a symbol or something like that. Once it disappears, something sure is wrong and somebody would be in trouble for it. ^_^

Yep, our four "love fools" are wising up! In this chap, we'll see Sasu's so called upgrade from being a "StERDBwcSwhiDthBF" to a somewhat sweet guy.

Thanks for that wonderful review! So excited to see if the angst here satisfies you. ^_^

p.s. Our new angel is Chelmonde Steffaniah, she's really small but don't let it fool you, her voice is a lot larger than she is!lol

BadAssAlec: Sorry. ^_^

I have no cliffie this time so you don't have to hate me after reading this chap. lol

I personally like ShikaIno here. So the feeling is mutual. ^_^

Thanks for the review!

Thanks to Ichigochan Shall Eat Your SOUL (I love your pen name, btw) and LilyVampire for adding BttB to their faves/alerts list.

_Italics: flashback_

_Italics underlined: sentences spoken in the past_

_**Italics bold: SMS/text message**_

Naruto isn't mine.

Ever felt like a clown? Doing nothing but make a joke out of life? Just to make yourself smile despite all the anguish you're in? Waiting for someone to see you as something other than the lab partner/project genius/driver/confidante/adviser/buddy/chaperone a.k.a. the ever loyal bff will. Best friend for life: only seen as one and anything beyond that is considered a great felony.

"_Are you ready Sakz? We need to get there before she does," Sasucakes was in my room, waiting for me to finish my shower. We were to __**surprise**__ his redhead. Today marks the first month of them being together. _

_Truth is, I have finished my shower and even dressed myself already. I just needed to practice. I need to practice more._

_I inhaled deep and stared at myself in the mirror. My eyes still look kinda puffy and my nose still had the red tinge to it. I resorted to crying in front of Sasori-nii so he'd allow me to go out. After all, it IS a school night. It would have been easier of it was Kaa-san I would ask permission from, but she wasn't home._

_Sasori-nii probably thought that I was just crying to get what I wanted. I __**did **__smile brightly after he said yes. I even skipped and sang a happy song while I was going to my room to shower. What he and everyone else didn't know was that I cried in front of him so I won't have tears left later, that it was painful to smile and hard to act all cheery in front of everyone. I could convince him (albeit it would be very difficult to do so) to allow me to go out, but I figured crying would empty my tear ducts. I don't need my tear ducts later._

_I practiced my smile. It looked a little crooked and a little pained. I tried to chuckle, I sounded a little fake. This wont work! Smile Sakura, smile properly! Nothing's wrong, Sasucakes is your __**friend**__ and you need to help him make his girlfriend happy, no matter how painful it is for you, you need to smile to show everyone that you're alright!_

"_Sakz?" There was knocking this time. Sasucakes sounded a little impatient. Wait for a bit Sasucakes, I'm doing this for you. I don't want you to worry about me, I want you to be happy and worry-free tonight. "Sakz, are you alright? What's taking you?" The knocking continued. _

_I sighed and tried again. I smiled adding more feeling to my eyes. It still didn't work. I still looked like I wanted to cry. I HAVE to do this! Why can't I do this? I smile all the time, I even laugh easily. Why can't I do it now?_

"_Sakz? I'm going in alright? You're decent, aren't you?" Oh yeah, he knows where I keep my keys._

_I sighed and had a last attempt at laughing but I stopped on the last second. _

"_Sakz?" He stood behind me. I could see in his reflection that he was a bit worried. "Are you alright?" At least you're concerned of my wellbeing Sasucakes. That alone is enough for me to go along with this charade. _

_I smiled and nodded. All this smiling is straining my facial muscles. I laughed. "I'm okay Sasucakes! Now let's go and make your redhead happy!" I laughed again. _

_He raised a single eyebrow and sort of assessed me. "Are you sure you're fine? I don't want you to screw things up." _

_I swallowed the painful lump in my throat. Nope, he's not concerned for my wellbeing at all! He just doesn't want me to screw things up! So his surprise for his redhead would be perfect!_

_Can't you see Sasucakes? It's still difficult to convince myself that I can't have you anymore. That you are Karin's boyfriend. That you're not mine._

_I still dream of you at night. Even though I try really, really hard not to think of you before I go to sleep. And each morning I wake up with a smile, because in my dreams, you were my prince, my knight in shining armour, my ninja protector, you loved me back and I already have my happily ever after. But after minutes of smiling at nothing I would cry. Because then REALITY would bite me back. Because then I would realize that I am a selfish person. Because then I would be betraying Karin, and I can't have that. Karin. What does she have that I don't? _

_I turned around and went outside. I couldn't take it anymore. The space we were in was suffocating me. I needed to get out. I breathed in deep, sighed, braced myself, and smiled. _

_Even without my mirror, I know it didn't work. I know I still look like a clown, frowning but is somewhat forced to smile because of the already smiling paint he has on his lips. "My face is broken," I covered my mouth with my hands. Oh shit! I said that out loud? I looked behind me; Sasucakes was playing with his set of keys. Good, he didn't hear me._

_I tried to laugh again, more loudly this time. Great! I even __**sound **__broken! "Have I ever let you down Sasucakes?" He looked at me, nodded and went on outside._

_I followed him out. "I'll take you home afterwards," I sighed again. I love his voice. He looked back at me and smirked. I love his eyes. I love his eyebrows? His nose, his lips, his- "Sakz?" sarcasm, his violent tendencies (__You are a dipshit Dobe! No one appreciates a person who suddenly jumps at them! It is not my fault Sakz, don't glare at me like it's my fault! He should know better than to jump at me while I was holding a baseball bat!__) , his moods, his volatile temper (__Itachi you fucking bastard! Get the fuck out of my fucking room! You sick fucker!__), the feel of his hair on my hands, his pissed off state (__Sakura-chan? Why is Teme looking at me like he wants to murder me? All I did was kiss your hand? I wonder what he'll do if I kiss you on the lips?)__, the way he moves, the way he smiles that small smile of his, his confusion when he wakes up (__Sakz? Why are you here? Weren't you at the kitchen making me riceballs? Why are you wearing you own shirt? Weren't you wearing my championship shirt a while ago?)__, how he allows me to stick butterfly tattoos on his shoulder (__Do I have to do this? I look stupid Sakz!)__, how he eats the ice cream (then grimaces after taking a bite) that I love so much (__What the hell do you like in this thing? Tch!__), how he opens canned drinks for me (__You are so fucking annoying Sakz! Don't you know anything? That is not the correct way to open that! Give me that can!__), I love everything he does. I love him! I am in love with my friend! "Sakz, do the world a favor snap out of it. I hate it when you stare blankly at nothing," I am in love with my selfish, charming, perfectly sarcastic friend. I am soooo totally screwed! _

Mr. fashionably sensitive but too cool to care, as Jewel would put it, would in one way or another sweep you off your feet. He's perfect in every way, even his nonsense talks and humorless jokes, and your only problem is going to be the biggest problem all your life-having him for yourself. And since he's currently in love with somebody, which is more often than not the case, except of course the instances when he's addicted to basketball/soccer or online games, you'd be listening to the stories that you've memorized and you'd have no time to execute your wicked plan of bagging him.

Chances come but you'd be too engrossed in watching his every move. Even the twitch of his wrist would enthrall you (which is pathetic of course). At first it would be fun but as time goes by you'd feel more and more alienated from his world. Every star would hear your prayer, but none would answer. Somebody else usually owns him. So you'd have to rest in pieces on one corner 'til he runs to you with some God forsaken story, which would break you again.

"_You can DO it Forehead! Go already; your gorgeous raven won't bite! Just go already!" My overbearing PIG of a best friend was pushing me towards our TARGET. _

_He was currently brainstorming about something, his forehead wrinkled and sighing every few seconds. He was sitting under a tree near the goal post, legs bent Indian style, eyes glinting seriously, fingers clenching and wrist turning once in a while. I sighed, I love looking at his arms. The twitch in the muscles makes me wanna pinch it and see if it's as hard as it looks. _

_What am I doing? I shouldn't be doing this. _

"_Pig, this isn't a good time! Look at him! He's obviously pissed about something!" Our target looked up and saw us. He raised an eyebrow and his position turned relaxed. His ramrod straight back gave a small slouch and his eyes, although I'm not really sure about this one, became soft. _

_No, that's just not right. Sasucakes' eyes don't turn soft. It's either they go hard as steel or blank with apathy, at least that's what everyone says. So I must be wrong, must be hallucinating each time I see some sort of softness in his eyes. I sighed and remembered all the times I wished on stars for him to fall for me. I guess all that wishing is making me believe that his actions mean something else. I'm putting meaning to his actions! Assuming that he feels something for me though he obviously doesn't! Arrgghhh! I hate myself!_

"_Sakz, Nara's girlfriend," he nodded his head. I smiled. Nara's girlfriend eh?_

"_Shut up Ice Princess!" I laughed at Ino's pissed reply. Sasucakes looked at me and smiled a little, I love seeing him smile. "Anyway, we are here to ask your opinion," the stupid Pig pushed mo towards him. The nerve! "Does Forehead look better now, or does she look less horrific before she had her hair cut?"_

_He stared at me without saying anything. I fiddled with my fingers and looked down. Geesh! I'm acting like Hina when we were in grade school! He hummed and I looked at him again._

"_What exactly do you want me to say Mrs. Nara?" Ino-Pig hates it when people make it sound like she's Shika-kun's property. I chuckled. I love it when Sasucakes tries to piss Pig off. It makes me want to go 'Take that Forehead! That's what you get for bullying me biatch!'._

_Pig growled a little and huffed. "You do know that I hate you right?" I laughed. Oh love you Sasucakes!_

"_With a thousand burning suns Deer-girl?" Pig screeched and I laughed some more. _

"_You are nothing but a good for nothing pretty boy Uchiha! Arrgghh! Why do girls like you so much?" I continued laughing. I only stopped laughing when Pig got all quiet. _

_I glanced at her. She was looking intently in front of us. She's looking at Sasucakes. Huh? Why is that? I looked back at Sasucakes. He was looking at me. I don't see anything wrong, why the heck is Pig staring at him like that?_

_Sasucakes shook his head, his hair following his movement. He put his hand behind him and stood. It was a few seconds before I realized that I was still staring at his hands. "-transfixed Sakz? Is there something wrong with my arm?" I looked up, oh of course not Sasucakes, just that I like looking at it, not to mention I like looking at your hair, your eyes, your nose- "Are you alright? Seriously, you hang out with the Dobe too much. I'll take you home today, and don't go near him. He's turning you into a female him," he came closer and I held my breath but failed. He smelled sooo freaking good! "I have to go, I have to pick up Yakumo from class."_

_My shoulders slumped and I sighed. Yakumo is what, his third 'girl' for the month? Or is it the fourth. I sighed again. Why oh why does he have to do this? I mean I understand that Karin broke him but isn't dating tons of girls in a month going a little overboard?_

"_Forehead? Who the hell is Yaku-what's her face?" I felt Pig standing in front of me. I was looking at my hands. She held my shoulders and laughed. "Oh come on, smile! Did you see his expression? He smiled when he looked at you, he looked happy to see you!"_

"_Yeah right, if he did then why didn't I see it Pig?" I swear this is going no where! "For all I know, you're just saying that so you could make me a life sized doll or something!" She had been trying to make me look different for the past few days, so Sasucakes would 'notice' me. _

"_You didn't see it cos you were too busy laughing your face off when your good for nothing imaginary boyfriend was making fun of me that's why!" I covered her mouth._

"_Shut up Pig!" She glared at me and I let go. _

_I watched as Sasucakes walked towards the school building. _

_Are you alright Sasucakes? Sometimes I feel like I don't know you anymore. You've become really different after what Karin did. Why are you doing this? You're hurting me when you act all cold and contained sometimes. And what's with all these girls and all the parties you go to? You used to stay at home most of the time. Now, I could barely see you each time I visit your house. _

_And it hurts every time I see you with them. It hurts every damn time!_

_I'm tired Sasucakes. I'm tired of hiding what I feel. I'm tired of pretending to be alright when everything you are doing is tearing me to pieces. I want you back. I want my old Sasucakes back. Come back to me. Please. _

The pieces of you become smaller and smaller 'til it becomes too smashed for repair. Being numb would come in handy in situations which needs sufficient power not to break down and cry in front of him. By this time you're already a master of this craft so it won't be a problem at all. Breathing would be a luxury but there's always the good old "I gotta use the ladies room" excuse.

"_Sakubabe? Are you in there?" Oh my god no! Please don't let it be so! I hurriedly stood up from my bed and ran to my bathroom. My eyes are still puffy! Shit! "Sakubabe," Karin was saying my name in a singsong voice now. If I don't get out soon enough, she'll barge in uninvited for sure! I can't have that! _

_I washed my face. Maybe she'd think that the tear stains were from the water I used. No, she won't think that. The tearstains disappeared when I washed my face. Sheesh! This is making me dumb! _

"_Sakz?" What the hell! NOOOOOOO! "Sakz we are coming in alright?" I heard my door open and I sighed. I hate it when this happens._

_Karin and Sasucakes have the habit of lazing around in my room once or twice a week. They were here yesterday and I haven't cried enough yet! Why are they here now? Can't they like come back tomorrow or like never come back for good?_

_When I got out of my bathroom Sasucakes already had his face buried in one of my pillows. Karin was looking through my DVD case. _

_Sasucakes looks tired. Is he alright? His back looked really tense. I approached the bed and sat beside him. "Sasucakes?" He inhaled but other than that there was no response._

"_I know! We could watch your favorite movie Sakubabe?" I glanced at Karin and saw that she was holding my favorite DVD. "So you're sure to watch it with us," somebody groaned. I smiled despite the ache in my throat. "No complaints Sasu! Sakubabe went out last time because you chose to watch that gruesome movie!"_

_Great! I have to watch it with them? No freaking way! "No it's alright Karin, he can choose any movie he likes, I have to do something in the kitchen anyways," I smiled a REALLY painful smile and stood up. "Ahmm have fun?" _

_I was about to leave the room when Sasucakes talked. He turned his head sideways and gave me an assessing glance. "Since when did you leave your room earlier than nine in the morning Sakz? You hate getting up early," he looked so at ease lying there face down in my bed that I wanted to smile." Now quit it with the kitchen crap and stay here, we are watching A Walk to Remember," I gaped at him. What the hell! Demanding much?_

"_No really, it's no problem at all!" I have a very bad feeling about this!_

"_No, you are staying here. I do not want to throw you out of your own room. And Karin bought you milk chocos, it's in the red shopping bag, you can eat it while we watch" I sighed and looked down. Karin grinned and went to start the movie. She sat down beside Sasucakes on my bed and I opted to sit below it, right in front of the TV, so that I couldn't see them and pay more attention to the movie. _

_When we got to the middle of the movie, I could here Karin moaning her boyfriend's name. I started to take deep breaths but I was feeling like the air was choking me. I have schooled my features to look like there was nothing wrong. I was so good at it that I wanted to hate myself. I didn't know being numb was still painful. There was nothing wrong with my face, except for my eyes. No matter what I do the tears kept on coming. I wanted to bolt because it feels like my shirt is suffocating me. I couldn't talk because my throat hurt so badly and I have a feeling that my voice would crack if I do._

_Keep it down you two! Can't you see that I'm busy picking up broken pieces of myself! I can't concentrate with you creating all those noises! Give a girl a break will ya!_

_ARRGHH! Why am I in this situation again? Oh yeah, I had to fall in love with an extremely controlling person who won't take no for an answer!_

"_Sasu!" Oh fuck! I can't take this anymore! _

_Why am I still here? I inhaled deep, and trying to control the tremble in my voice I spoke, "I gotta use the ladies' room," I stood up and bolted out of my room. I went straight to the powder room in the hall and locked myself inside. I cried and cried. I screamed, covering my face with the towel to muffle the sound I emit._

_When I was calm enough, I thought for a moment. I had my own bathroom in my room, why the hell did I use this one! I just had to be so freaking obvious! God I'm so stupid! Why? Why does this have to happen to me?_

He acts like a total jerk 99% of the time, but still you wait for the rare 1% (which happens like once in a blue moon) to happen. And when this time comes you'd be in cloud nine only to bounce back to hell when you realize he's being nice coz he has someone new and he feels so damn good even his usual mood is changed. But you're willing to experience the pain (_masochist much Forehead?_) coz it's more important to see him happy, even though this would mean bleeding on your part. Still you'd say "_Really? I'm happy for you Sasucakes_", but all you want to say is "Stop it please! Can't you see I'm bleeding here?"

There are other people of course. But you'd end up comparing them to him (_Seriously Forehead stop it! If I was Sai I'd break up with you with the number of mistaken identities you've done to me. His name is Sai, quit gasping out your imaginary boyfriend's name when you're with him!_) and you'd realize that it would be useless to direct your attention to others, and it sucks when you finally found someone new, then he comes to you and makes you fall for him again (e.g. being nice, smiling that oh so gorgeous smile of his and doing the things that make you weak in the knees, and smelling so damn good it hurts your nose!) and you'd end up confused.

Ok. Sometimes you'll feel good, like you're in heaven or something. Though you're dead tired; his presence alone rejuvenates you. He can be a jerk but still you know there's 'something good' inside him. Being with him is exciting, even though you have no exchange of words. There are times you'd miss his 'overprotective' ways and his sarcastic quirks. Though he hurts you 99 percent of the time, you still have 1 percent of happy memories together. So, being stupid with him is kinda worth it sometimes. Since you'll have something to hold on to and laugh about when you're alone (_Did you take your anti-psychotic meds Sakubabe? You DO know that laughing at nothing in particular makes you look crazy right?_).

Sometimes you'd wish you'd get dead drunk so you could sort of have the confidence to confess. Drinking sessions come in but you'd be forced not to join the fun when he's around. Scared you'd goof off like the other girls. You'd get good old spanking from him if you get drunk too! You're supposed to be his long lost sister! You should behave accordingly. DUH! He's the only one claiming that anyway so you can still fantasize you and him living in a house near the beach, with windows overlooking the mountains. Spending waking hours with him would really be wonderful, glorious even. But then when you realize it's not gonna happen, you'll sulk again. Goodbye happiness, hello depression.

Funny though that when you talk or argue about little things, it'd be "_Your fault Sakz! Why the hell did you go to that part of the water! It was fucking deep and your legs are fucking tired from practice! Are you trying to kill yourself?_" But when it comes to major things, he usually takes the blame, or at least finds ways to make it up to you in small ways. He goes '_hn_,' and accepts whatever it is that you throw at him (verbally and physically). But if you'll dig deeper, he just doesn't want to talk about it. He hates having have to deal with the pissed off you (or the mute, unsmiling, angry, violent version of you in some cases) and would remain stoic and act uncaring but his eyes have a certain shine when he looks at you, making you doubt if he really cares or not.

He acts tough (or at least tries to act tough) during difficult times, like he's superman or something. You'll feel like he's amazing, nothing could stop him and he's invincible. And then you'd dream and wish on stars again, for you to be his Achilles' heel, his weakness.

You'll feel extremely special thinking that he only ever 'crumbles' with _only _you around too, like he trusts you enough to allow you to see his weakness. And there you go, falling deeper and deeper into him.

Forgiveness? What's the true meaning of the word? You'd learn it as time goes by, since he's done so many awful and hurtful things to you. Though he appears clueless of what he did, still it pains you. But just one hello and you'd forgive whatever it is that he did, even though it took you weeks to stop yourself from crying because of what he's done.

When he's away, instead of saying 'wish u were here' or 'I miss u' (_Sakura-chan? I didn't know you favor listening to Incubus' songs? Teme's rubbing off on yah!_) you'd end up saying nothing at all. You'll spend minutes staring at your phone, figuring out how to end the dilemma of delivering the SMS you want to send or deleting it instead. You usually end up deleting the damn message coz you know you'll never get a reply. That's how pathetic you'll be.

There are occasions wherein you'll be invited/forced by him to accompany him somewhere. You'd go "_I feel good!nanananananana..I knew that I would!_". You'd scramble to your feet, find a good excuse so your mom (and brothers!) will let you out late and savor the moment you have with him. Even though you know the turnabout of this situation-you, crying yourself to sleep. Coz when you get together and talk about serious stuff, you'd end up talking about his long array of girls, and like you never had enough, you'd listen to his unending complaints about the complicated species called females. You should just build yourself a monument and place it in the town park together with all the martyrs.

"_I told you about her last week," I looked up from the rough draft of our school paper and raised my glasses upwards; it was starting to slip with all the writing/typing/drawing I've been doing. I was on my bed face down on my current headache-inducer. The letters were swimming in my eyes because Sasucakes kept on moving beside me._

"_Sasucakes, quit moving around I beg you!" All the rough drafts of the articles I printed were surrounding me on my bed and I could hear lots of them being torn apart because of all his excessive moving around._

_I don't understand why he likes to talk to me about his girls. It's not like I ask him about them. In fact, I don't even want to THINK about them, much more HEAR about them! It's like he's making me jealous or something. But that's just plain wrong. Why would he make me jealous?_

_And they're pretty redundant too. They usually have red hair or if not, they would have jade orbs. I couldn't help but imagine that he likes green eyes, I blinked. I have green eyes Sasucakes! And my hair isn't that far from red, it's just a shade lighter. It even looks red in the dark sometimes! It looks kind of red when it's wet too! I touched my hair. Why does it have to be pink? If it had been red like Sasori-nii and Nagato-nii's then I could invite all of Sasucakes' girls in one room, position the girls with the green eyes in the right side, the girls with the red hair at the left and stand in the middle. And then tell him that I have BOTH the things he's fond of physically. Then maybe he'd realize that he likes me. _

_It would really be nice for you to look at me sometimes Sasucakes. REALLY look at me. Like how a guy looks at a girl. I'm blind to everyone and everything when you're around; you're the only one I see. It's only fair for you to look at me, even for just a second, even for only a short while. It would make me really happy._

_But given a choice, I wouldn't want you to only like me physically. I want you to appreciate me in a deeper aspect. Like how I adore you. You'd be a complete ass but I'd still love you. Even if you got an accident and would look like a horribly disfigured alien, I'd still smile everyday and give you the best of me. But you don't see that, you're too busy juggling your time for your girls. You don't even have time for me sometimes. _

_Before, you would be the one to wait for me and take me home (__Sakz are you done yet? We've been here for hours! I told you to ask Lazy-Boy and his vain girlfriend for help but nooo, you just had to deny my proposal and do it yourself! Why the hell are you so stubborn?)__ when my responsibilities in school make my life a living hell, not that I don't appreciate Nej and Tennie taking me home instead of you but all the strain from school disappears when you smile at me Sasucakes. I feel abnormally high when I'm with you. You're like my anti-stress drug. And you make me laugh too, in a completely different way. I love myself when I'm with you, that is if we don't talk about you're experienced girls, coz if we do, then I'd hate myself coz I always end up crying my eyes out._

"_Which one was she, the one in the little black dress?" He smirked. "The one with that severe case of ADHD," he chuckled, that girl was really borderline crazy! "or the one with the small pink dog? You do know that polygamy is frowned upon right?" He stared at me for a moment, seemingly gauging my reaction before answering me. _

"_I don't get it, is that it? That's your reaction to all this?" How am I supposed to react then Sasucakes? Cry and yell at you for telling me your love (__I do NOT believe in love Sakz, so shut it with all the love crap__) life? "And I don't understand why she had to dye the poor creature's fur. Why do you girls do that?" Oh he's a bit talkative today huh. "Why do you like to torture people?" _

"_I didn't know you liked animals Sasucakes," he raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms. "Now, shut up and let me concentrate, I need to submit this to Tsunade-sama by this afternoon. Not all of us can spend the day frolicking in the sun with our unusually large number of girlfriends, gods Sasucakes you are such a polygamous pig," he chose not to comment on what I said and stayed silent beside me. _

_After a few minutes of silence he stood up, sighed and turned around. "Fine, I'll just sleep the day away," he took a tour around my bed before stopping. "Where is your red pillow Sakz?"_

_I waved a hand and answered him. "It's in the living room; you brought it there for your nap granpa. Sheeesh! I cannot believe you forgot already! You drooled on it minutes ago!" more papers were torn apart with his movements. This is exactly why I banned him from my bed this morning! ARRGHH! How am I ever going to get this done if he destroys the fruit of my hard labor! ARRGHH! _

"_I did no such thing. And since you are beginning to act like an old witch, I will kidnap your favorite pillow and bring it to your guestroom. It will be my hostage. You shall be informed about the ransom later," I pretended to ignore him and continued my task, it was really difficult to hide my smile. I love his mood when he just woke up; he's more playful than normal._

_The sound of my mobile phone woke me up from my musings. _

_MESSAGE FROM SASUCAKES: READ?_

_I smiled and clicked ok. It read __**"Onigiri, with lots of tomatoes. Without it, your beloved red pillow will die a gruesome death!" **__I laughed. I just love just-woke-up-Sasucakes!_

Spending years of trying to forget him gets you nowhere. And enjoying your time with him doesn't hurt (at least that's what you're trying to show/trying to tell yourself). Being with him is like having a double edged sword. The other side heals and the opposite side wounds. You're happy but you're sad at the same time. Knowing he chose you to share his important issues lifts you up, but those issues hurt you bad that it brings you down again (_I think I know what you mean about losing something important Sakz, I cant believe Karin did that to me_).

It's weird and confusing.

It's weird because when you know the end of something great is coming, you want to hold on. Just for one second. Just so it can hurt a little more. Just so you can feel the pain and know that it's true.

And it gets confusing how long you will be in love with the person whom you've shared special moments with cause everything is just SPECIAL, but not OFFICIAL. I'm one step shy of becoming your girlfriend Sasucakes, I've been your best friend since forever. I'm always second in line, I want to step up and be the first for once. I want to be your number one girl (except for Mikoto-san of course!). No, scratch that. I don't want to be your number one, because if you have a number one, you're sure to have a number two. I want to be your _only_one Sasucakes. Just like how you're my only one.

But I have to say goodbye now, I've been delaying this long enough. You're talking and I don't even understand what you're talking about. I keep getting lost in your eyes and think of all the things we've shared. Just like how a dying person could see his life flashing in his eyes just before his last breathe. So this is how it feels to finally say goodbye.

"-feel like this Sakz," I sighed. I have to do it. Say I love you and then walk away with a smile and never look back. "-logize for taking too long to say this," apologize. Yeah I apologize for delaying this.

Please know that you are not only a special part of me Sasucakes. You are my life. And I have decided to end my life to make you happy.

"I love you Sasucakes."

"I love you Sakz."

And then there was silence. And it went on and on and on and on.

I could hear a faint 'foolish little brother' remark from somewhere but that's not important and wait, I'm confused, I don't get it.

What were we talking about? Sasucakes was blushing. I gaped at him. I could feel the cogs in my brain slowly turning again. He had said something so important that made my brain halt all activity.

Hold up! Freakin' pause and freakin' rewind. Did he just say he loves me? NO FREAKING WAY!

"What? Are you crazy Sasucakes?" He can't do this! "You can't freakin' DO this to me! I've decided to forget you godflammit! I wanted to end all this and say goodbye! I was gonna say goodbye while smiling too! How could you freaking do this to me! I planned and planned for this day! I spent a week, a WEEK Sasucakes! Thinking of ways to go about this situation! Contemplating about what to do with you and this stupid feeling I have for you made me emo you bastard! And I was all emo for a freakin' WEEK! I could have spent that week doing something productive but nooooo, I just had to make plans on how to finally, FINALLY after more or less a DECADE of trying, a DECADE godflammit! Finally say goodbye without crying and going all weak in front of you! And now you're saying you love me too? Are you freakin' mental! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME GODFLAMMIT!"

There were faint voices at the back of my head but I didn't pay attention to it.

"Gods Sasucakes! Don't you dare play with my feelings you arrogant bastard! I am going to kill you once I get my hands on something sharp and pointy!" He smiled that smile that I love so much and his eyes were happy. I inhaled. I need to breathe! "Stop looking at me like that! You're making me forget how to breathe godflammit!" He laughed and I gaped at him again.

"Who said anything about playing Sakz?" What? No. you can't be serious!

"You can't be serious? How could you say that? I'm a klutz, I look weird-I have pink hair for crying out loud, my forehead's enormous and I can't breathe properly when you're around! Don't come near me, I have to talk first! I change topics faster than a bullet and I think I have a pseudo bipolar disease or something!"

I'm making no sense at all! I walked backwards and it was hard concentrating when he's looking at me like that. Is this for real? He looks so sincere it's scaring me. I can't do this. What if he gets tired of me? I'm boring and plain. I can't have him, he's perfect. What could I possibly give him except headaches and problems? We could be happy but could that last? What if he'll get bored and leave me like a hot potato like all his exes?

"Sakz, what are you so afraid of?" I finally stopped and looked up. He was smiling down at me.

He figured it out.

"Yeah but. Sasucakes, I'm not perfect. I-" he stopped my upcoming speech by covering my mouth with his lips. My eyes almost bulged out of their sockets before I shut them and grabbed his shirt. I tiptoed a little and I felt him smile. The kiss was short and sweet and it was perfect.

I was still dazed when he talked. "Don't try to make yourself perfect for me. I love you and every single imperfection you have," oh shit my knees are melting! Is this really Sasucakes talking?

"What was that? I wanna hear it again baby Sasu-chan! Make it a little louder so it would register well in the video," was that Mikoto-san? I tried to turn around but Sasucakes' hold on me tightened. I didn't even realize that one of his arms was holding me. His other hand was playing with my hair.

"Mother, why are you here? Itachi you bastard put down that camera!" I hid my face in his chest and closed my eyes. This is embarrassing. Wait, I'm in a really convenient position to do something I've always wanted. I smiled and inhaled. Gods I love his smell! He was hunched down a little so I might possibly reach his neck if I put up a little effort. I tiptoed I was right, I did reach his neck! "Sakz? What are you doing? Stop that right this moment."

Everyone around us laughed. But I don't care. I finally have my happily ever after. This is the best day of my life.

I take it all back, I don't hate my life. I love it! It's better than the best!

* * *

So how was it? Was it alright or is it a little 'crooked'?

I'm starting to write the Sasu-version of this chap but I'm telling you, IT IS EFFIN' HARD! I'm getting headaches making Sasu somewhat still "Sasuke-like" but its sooooo damn hard to make him confess properly!

So please please post lots and lots of suggestions to make my life a little easier.

As always, please leave a review!


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